Tanner / Packer Memorial Show 2018

[SWAT Team]

Jeremy Tucker : That’s the song Fulton! Come Together! The SWAT locker room is doing that tonight in remembrance of our departed legends, and we are going to put on one hell of a show in their name!

Andrew Fulton : Preach it Jerry! The House of Pain were the BOMB!

Jeremy Tucker : Reginald P Packer WAS SWAT! Adrian Tanner our greatest star EVER! Tonight, we honour them and celebrate their lives and careers!

Andrew Fulton : That’s right Jerry. We are going OLD SCHOOL UWA style, and bringing back the Challenge of the Champions! Every title holder here at SWAT in the ring at once, the winner, a Golden Ticket to the Haunted House at Helloween where we crown SWAT’s World Heavyweight Champion!

Jeremy Tucker : The Amazons are breaking out in a 3 cage frenzy, where the winner there too will get a Golden Ticket to Helloween!

Andrew Fulton : We got more Golden Tickets than Willy Wonka, so much so even the girls can get one!

Jeremy Tucker : The “girls” are blowing away the Wrestling World here at SWAT and breaking new ground every day! We welcome this new direction where they are also eligible to hold the big gold belts.

Andrew Fulton : Being invited to the party is one thing, being the last person standing after the big professional power drinkers get going, another. Let’s see how this goes.

Jeremy Tucker : We also have the culmination tonight of a blood feud here at SWAT between Beelzebozo and Vile Vince Viper, these two have been building to this match for 12 months now, and tonight, we see them settle it, once and for all!

Andrew Fulton : Vile all the way Jerry! The man is a god!

Jeremy Tucker : He and Tanner were real close, so much so he came to us last year to make an appearance for the first Memorial show.

Andrew Fulton : Yeah, and never has left. What is this joint, like Wako Texas?

Jeremy Tucker : Pesci would have you believe Vegas. Also tonight, we see the return of one of our favoured SWAT stars, and one half of the Connection with Adrian Tanner, The Great Syberus returns to action here tonight, and he faces off with The King of Goths, Psychotic Goth!

Andrew Fulton : These two last year blew us all away with their battles in the infancy of the ACW, and build that region on their backs, Goth has been agitated with his lack of matches, and made an open challenge for tonight’s show, and as luck would have it, there in the building waiting to make his return, was his old foe, The Great Syberus, isn’t it wonderful when coincidence plays out so in the wrestling world Jerry.

Jeremy Tucker : Yeah, how about that, and what about our opening match for the night, named after Mr Packers stable, the House of Pain!

Andrew Fulton : And you know what’s at stake for the winner of the House of Pain match Jerry, yup, you guessed it, a Golden ticket.

Jeremy Tucker : Speaking of, let’s take you to two people who already have golden tickets to Helloween, from winning last year’s Anzac cup, The Thailand Express!

(Team Fairtex is walking through a corridor when a Tye Gibson comes up to them.)

Tye Gibson: "Team Fairtex what are your thoughts about The House of Pain Match."

Tong Fairtex: "You know when it comes to this kind of match. I'm not afraid at all and never will be afraid at all about this kind of match and you know why?"

Tye Gibson: "Why?"

Tong Fairtex: "This kind of match is right up my alley. This kind of match reminds me of Hardkore Helloween when Hardkore World still existed. At one point during the barbed wire ring match in my ring bloc I lasted close to an hour in that match before getting pinned or submitted. That was the longest period in the match for me and it still stands too."

Phantam Fairtex: "You actually made it that long in a match so brutal and bloody....."

Tong Fairtex: "Yeah and now you'll be experiencing that too and you will be introduced to real extreme and hardcore action that's Hardkore World style."

Tye Gibson : "What do you think of your competition in the match."

Phantam Fairtex: "Plenty of tough guys in this match and let me tell you it's not going to be easy but Team Fairtex is going to be ready and we're going to go out there and win. We're out to spill blood if we have to and we will spill blood if we have to in order to win."

Tong Fairtex: "Like my brother just said. We're out for blood and we're going to spill some and we're going to bleed as well just to win and get another golden ticket. Now as for the competitors we have a few scores to settle and we're going to settle them in that barbed wire ring. First off we're going to target Strike Force Nick Roth and Shane Sky. Now we have nothing against you two and you were pretty good out there. Yet it was still spoiled by Bro Code and Top Guys."

Phantam Fairtex: "Yeah it takes some really big ass to cost us our match and then attack us, but you know what that saying goes and that's 'Revenge is the sweet as the nectar that comes from it.' Oh it's going to be sweet when we give you a taste of that reality. Oh we're going to make sure you bleed real good and we'll use that barbed wire just to wrap you up so we can beat you down real good."

Tong Fairtex: "Which doesn't mean we haven't forgotten you Strike Force. We still plan on beating you decisively in the middle of the ring whether it be pin or submission which doesn't matter to us as long as we come out on top."

Phantam Fairtex: "Which is what we plan on doing no matter what we have to do to do it."

Tye Gibson: "What about Massacre."

Tong Fairtex: "Thanks for mentioning them. Let me tell you something Mrs. Parish and you ask your clients if they can understand plain English and not voice scrambled Australian clichés. Who are they really and how come they came just at the same time Pesci got rid of Soutter and Christian Sebastian Kennedy....."

(Phantam does an imitation of Mr. Kennedy.)

Phantam Fairtex: "Mrrrrrrrr.........Kennnnneddddddyyyyyyyyy!.......Kennedy!"

Tong Fairtex: "Strange coincidence that Malyce just happened to call me out even though the two of us never wrestled in the ring before our tag team match. Yeah Malyce strange coincidence huh. Well let me tell you something Malyce or is it CSK. In the ring or outside the ring I'm going to pull your mask off and expose you to the rest of SWAT no matter what anyone thinks. That will link you to Menace aka Soutter and Mrs. Parish I do have a long memory compared to your selective memory addled client."

Phantam Fairtex: "We won't need much effort to even tear the masks off since we can easily use the barbed wire to shred their masks off and expose them for the cons and frauds they really are."

Tye Gibson: "There's another individual whom you know James Fierce."

Tong Fairtex: "Yeah I remember him from my days in Hardkore South when he was the first Hardkore South Heavyweight Champion when Packer was running the place. He was tough and doesn't give up easily and I found that out when I wrestled him for the title. We were bleeding and it was quite the brutal war as it was billed as but in the end I won the Hardkore South Heavyweight Title. Then I defeated him in an equally bloody and brutal affair to retain the title and then you know who decided to take a cheap shot at me."

Phantam Fairtex: "A certain individual whom I shall not name but he enjoys hiding behind a mask and his name's Soutter."

Tye Gibson: "Will you be able to remove the mask."

Phantam Fairtex: "Whatever it takes we'll do it. Yeah Mrs. Parish we intend to make sure that we get our revenge on Massacre and make Mr. Pesci really happy while we collect another golden ticket."

Tye Gibson: "What do you think of Ronnie Cash."

Tong Fairtex: "He better watch his back or shall I say his crotch, because I may decide to use a wrench on his balls or even better yet barbed wire on his crotch. Believe me you're going to see how it's like when this vengeful husband gives you the beatdown you never really received. Nothing or nobody's going to get in my way and I'm going to make sure you don't even get any closer to a golden ticket or a gold title. You won't be spending any cash Cash and you won't be called the man in black unless it includes blue as well. Hell I'll include red like in blood red."

Phantam Fairtex: "That's how you're going to look when my brother gets through with you. Your face is going to be the canvas for my brother's artistry and it's going to be a classic beatdown on you."

Tye Gibson : "What do you think of Roderick Cage."

Tong Fairtex: "Total respect for the guy. He has the skills and the drive and desire to win. He may not have had an impressive debut against 'The Ruler' Paul Blair due to Blair's need for interference. Roderick's going to get back at him through his jackass of a partner. Well I know he's going to do quite well."

Phantam Fairtex: "There's going to be plenty of interference in the ring since everyone's going to be in the ring at once. There's no doubt there's going to be plenty of fender benders and lots of pile ups and plenty of bloody carnage. We'll see who survives the collision and receives the reward."

Tye Gibson: "What do you think of the newcomer Red Dragon."

Tong Fairtex: "Did Little Dragon change his name to Red Dragon."

Tye Gibson: "No that's his name."

Tong Fairtex: "So far he must be silent since he never even said anything since he got here. At least Little Dragon's more worthy to wrestle here and I know since I saw more of him than Red Dragon. Pesci would have invested well in Little dragon more than he would Red Dragon."

Phantam Fairtex: "More fire in him that Red Dragon and a lot more extreme and hardcore action than red Dragon. I don't even give Red Dragon much of a thought let alone chance to win. He's not even worthy to even be in SWAT if he doesn't keep up the promotional itinerary."

Tye Gibson: "Who do you want to win the golden ticket to the world title."

(Team Fairtex points to each other.)

Team Fairtex: "Him."

Tye Gibson: "Well thank you for your time and goodluck."

Tong Fairtex: "Yeah and we plan on making our own luck."

Phantam Fairtex: "Because we're the best there was, will and always plan to be and if nobody likes that they aren't even close to excellent."

(They leave the Reporter.)

Tye Gibson: "Back to you."

(The scene slowly fades to black.)

[SWAT Team]

The cameras return to ringside where Jeremy Tucker and Andrew Fulton are.

Jeremy: And we will see that House of Pain Match right NOW!.

The camera pulls away from the ring to show a dome of chain link over the ring where the competitors are. The ring announcer has just finished announcing everyone and is leaving the ring. As he steps out the door to the cage is closed and locked as well. All the men are seeing how the others measure up. Menace is the first person to step forward and he gets in the face of James Fierce. The two exchange words as behind them Tong and Phantom are looking to be going after Malyce, who is trying to stay away from them. But team Fairtex is having none of it and predicts Malyce's next move and Tong gets hold of Malyce from behind and Phantom lands a series of kicks to Malyce's stomach. In another area of the cage Shane Sky is the first to grab a weapon, choosing a kendo stick. He turns and uses it on Ronnie Cash, landing a blow to the stomach. Cash doubles over and Shane stays on him. He now has Ronnie on the mat and is landing blows to Cash, who seems to already be giving up. Sky goes to hook the leg

1……..

2……..

3!!

Jeremy: Someone has to be first.

Andrew: I would be embarrassed if that was me.

Jeremy: Why don’t you join them in the cage?

The door is opened and Cash manages to crawl over to it and leave the ring and the door is shut once again. Fierce is still going after Menace. However Fierce is pulling on the mask Menace wears.

Jeremy: Could we find out this evening who is under the mask?

Andrew: It could be just about anyone. Have you heard any rumors?

Jeremy: I haven’t, and I gather from that question neither have you.

There is chaos everywhere. Nick Roth has been circling Dash Walker. Dash decides to make the first move and he charges at Roth,, but Roth hits him with a back drop. Tong is going after Roderick Cage while Phantom is Red Dragon. Tong manages to throw Cage into the chain link and Cage screams in pain. Tong stays with Cage, and sets up Cage for a DDT that he lands and seems to knock Cage into a different state of mine. However Tong follows with a couple elbows before he hooks the leg.

1……..

2……..

3!!

Jeremy: And we have our second person eliminated.

Referees unlock the door so Cage can get out. Tong doesn’t think that Cage is moving fast enough so he picks Cage up and throws him towards the door. The referees manage to pull Cash out and close the door as Fierce has thrown Menace into the ropes. Fierce goes for a back drop but telegraphs it clearly and Menace grabs the ropes. Fierce looks up as Menace charges him but the Fairtex brothers decide to help out a bit and both hit Fierce with solid dropkicks. Menace goes for Fierce but people have forgotten there are a few others hanging in there. Scott Drake is one of those people and he is climbing up on the ropes and reaches for a metal bar. He drops down to the mat, sees Roth coming towards him and manages to pull the bar up as Nick charges, landing a blow squarely to the forehead of Roth, splitting him open. Blood is pouring down Roth’s face and he’s trying to see. Drake then gets behind Roth and hits him in the kidney area, causing Roth to collapse to the mat, blood pouring everywhere. Drake drops the metal bar and sets up Roth for a sharpshooter. Roth doesn’t take too long and he taps. After he does he crawls, leaving a trail of blood behind him. Medics are ringside waiting for Roth and he looks grateful to be done with the match.

Jeremy: People are dropping like flies around here.

Andrew: they should stop the match. Look at all that blood.

Jeremy: Really? YOU are concerned about blood in the ring?

Andrew: Well ……someone could slip on it.

Jeremy: Uh-huh. Stick with that idea.

Back in the ring Tong and Phantom decide to help Fierce out. Tong lays hands to Menace’s head as Phantom holds him. Tong has his brother release Fierce and throws him into the ropes. But Fierce sees it and grabs hold of the ropes. Tong looks up and is met with a kick to the face. Fierce goes for a pin.

1,……..

2..

Kickout!

Tong looks up and looks at the ref then his brother. Phantom pulls Fierce into a corner and both of them go to work on Fierce. Menace in the meantime has reached up on the cage and pulled down a baseball bat wrapped in barbwire. He turns, assesses his opponents and finally lands on the one guy who seems to be lucking out and charges at Red Dragon. Dragon is confused, but given no one else has really decided to take him on, he knows he needs to not let Menace land a blow. No such luck cause as Dragon turns and still gets hit with the bat, just in the back instead of the front. Dragon screams in pain and drops to his knees. Menace then hits Dragon in the back of the head with the bat and another scream comes out. Menace drops the bat and pulls Dragon up and power slams Dragon to the mat. He covers Dragon……

1……..

2……..

3!!

Jeremy: Red Dragon has been eliminated.

Andrew: We’re quickly seeing who will this will probably come down to.

Now that Menace has eliminated someone he turns back to the ring and sees Fierce slumped in a corner catching his breath. But Menace charges at Fierce but Fierce gets a knee up slowing down Menace just a bit. Fierce goes back to work on the mask to see if he can get it off. While he’s doing that Shane Sky made the mistake of going after Tong Fairtex. Phantom is now working Sky over, determined to take someone out. Tong has climbed up to get a weapon and it’s a board with a large railroad spike sticking out. He tosses it to his brother, who sends Sky into the ropes and then catches him in the shoulder with the spike. Sky slumps to the floor and Tong puts him in a cloverleaf causing Sky to scream in pain and tap!

Andrew: Shane Sky has been eliminated.

Meanwhile in a corner Fierce nearly has the mask off. Tong charges at Fierce but he moves, and Menace ends up on the receiving end of a body splash. Tong seems concerned but can’t focus on it too much as Dash Walker found the ball bat and nails Tong in the left shoulder, leaving small cuts that start to bleed. Phantom sees this attack on his brother and charges at Walker, yanking the bat from him. Tong yells to his brother, who comes in and hits Walker repeatedly with the bat. Finally Phantom stops and Walker slides to the mat. Phantom covers Walker

1……..

2……..

3!

Jeremy: Dash Walker has been…..

Before Jeremy can finish his words. Malyce is carrying Drake and then throws him into the cage right next to the door. But the ref tells Malyce he cant just throw Drake out so Malyce picks Drake up and hits a piledriver followed quickly by a second one. Drake appears to be dead to the world and Malyce arrogantly stands on Drake

1……..

2……..

3!!

Andrew: And just like that Scott Drake is eliminated as well.

Fierce is finally making some progress and the mask is almost off. Tong and Phantom try working over Fierce but not before…..

The mask is off…….

Jeremy: Oh my God….its….

ITS SOUTTER!

Andrew: Souter is in this match? He’s….Menace?

Jeremy: I’m glad to know you’re as stunned as me.

Andrew: No….it….um it explains why Menace is so good.

Jeremy: Look at the final five competitors we have. Any of these guys could win a huge prize. I can see any of them as world champion.

Andrew: Getting a bit ahead of yourself aren’t you? It’s only a golden ticket for the main event at the next pay per view, and THAT is for the SWAT World title.

Team Fairtex has recovered from the shock of seeing Soutter under the mask. They double team Soutter while Malyce is doing the same to Fierce. They seem to wear Malyce down and he slumps to the mat but neither of them covers and pin Malyce or put him in a submission hold. Instead they turn to go after Soutter, who is working Fierce over. He’s got a cut on his forehead and its bleeding profusely. Tong attacks Soutter from behind and when he turns he gets a dropkick from Phantom. Fierce seems to be catching his breath as Tong holds up Soutter and Phantom goes to land a vicious shoulder to Soutter but at the last minute Malyce jumps in front of Soutter, takes the shoulder plus Tong nails kicks to the head of Malyce. Phantom is the one to cover Malyce

1……

2……

3!!

Andrew: Malyce is eliminated.

Jeremy: I don’t see this going well for Soutter, these guys don’t like him.

One would think that having a three on one would slow Soutter down but he manages to fight off Tong and Phantom while Fierce catches his breath. Soutter hits a powerslam on Tong, and then hits the Soutter Special on Tong.

1…….

2……..

3!!

Tong Fairtex sits up dazed……and not believing he just got eliminated. He looks at Soutter, but Soutter is across the ring and the ref is telling Tong to leave. Tong does so but doesn’t look to thrilled about it. Phantom seems to be prowling the ring and then he nods at Fierce. Phantom goes to straitened up but he is so focused he forgot about Fierce! Even though they want the same thing, to beat Soutter and get the golden ticket, they don’t want to share the prize. Soutter watches them size each other and then charges at Phantom. He lands several right hands to Phantom’s face when suddenly his knees give out thanks to Fierce. Tong is standing on the steps, wanting to get back in the ring, but the referees made him get down and close the door. Phantom is momentarily distracted by Tong and Soutter hits a Soutter Special on Phantom and hooks a quick leg.

1……

2……

3!

Jeremy: Its down to Fierce and Soutter!

Fierce is wiping blood from his eyes as Soutter is catching his breath and they are circling each other. But Soutter is the faster man and charges and catches Fierce and quickly hits the Soutter Special for the third time in under 10 minutes! He hooks the leg, and then has to hit a couple more elbows to Fierce and again hooks the leg.

1…….

2…….

3!!!!

Jeremy: He did it! Soutter gets the ticket and he’ll get a title shot!

Andrew: I’m truly in shock but I know Soutter would be an awesome champion.

Jeremy: You are such a suck up.

[SWAT Team]

(Psychotic Goth is shown on the tron with Vampira on one side and Little Dragon on the other side both have their arms folded. In the background there are individuals dressed in red satanic robes.)

Psychotic Goth: "Tonight we shall be honoring the two greats in Hardkore World and SWAT. Tonight we shall be honoring the memories of these two legends in two various ways. There are Packer and Adrian Tanner, Jr. Two men who were influential in the time when both promotions were at their height and we still loyal to these promotions until they folded."

(He pauses.)

Psychotic Goth: "Packer ran Hardkore South and he was also a successful manager. He was quite worthy and he had an excellent division that was full of life and he kept it going quite efficiently. Never did Packer let talent go by the waist side. Never did he fail to create a good show and he kept doing it until the end when the division finally folded."

(He pauses.)

Psychotic Goth: "Then there was Adrian Tanner Jr. who was a legend in the ring and was considered one of the greatest champions in Hardkore World even to this day. He was an excellent singles champion and an excellent six-man and tag champion. He was a man with great Hall of Fame credentials and always was backed up by both his skills and accomplishments."

(Little Dragon looks to the side and hands him a framed picture.)


Psychotic Goth: "Adrian teamed with The Great Syberus to form The Connection. A successful tag team that faced everyone from Tiger's Den Dojo, Warhammer Corp., etc. They were a legendary tag team who held many titles during their run as champions in the tag team division."

(A slightly crazed and obsessed look crosses his face.)

Psychotic Goth: "Then a bit of selfishness occurred and it ruined Hardkore World! It destroyed this once powerful promotion due to that selfishness and power hungry greed! Yes I'm talking to you Syberus and your drive and obsession with power! You Syberus ruined everything good about Hardkore World and tarnished Hardkore World's good name!"

(He roars with a beastly bellow as he screams in a strange dialect.)

Psychotic Goth: "You don't remember, do you! Well do you! It was years ago when you challenged Johnnie Valentine to a match with control of Hardkore World at stake! You foolishly believed you could have done a better job but you were too incompetent to even realize the complexities! When you defeated Johnnie Valentine you condemned Hardkore World and it's legacy to it's death! You condemned it to hell all because you wanted power and you gained it but now you wished you regretted it!"

(A sadistic and evil look appears on his face.)

Psychotic Goth: "How does it feel Syberus. How does it feel to be so proud of your accomplishment of destroying Hardkore World by taking over as it's leader.
how does it feel to ruin all that was good for the promotion. The promotion that you and Adrian Tanner, Jr. prospered and made a name for yourselves in. The promotion you had success in but you decided that you wanted to destroy Hardkore World instead of continuing to grow it to make it even greater than it was."

(He roars.)

Psychotic Goth: "HOW DOES IT FEEL! YOU HAPPY ABOUT WHAT YOU DID GREAT SYBERUS!"

(He grows silent.)

Psychotic Goth: "Now I shall seek revenge for what you did to Hardkore World. I shall avenge Hardkore World's death by making you pay for what you did.
If you thought our SWAT ACW battles in the ring were bloody and violent. Tonight at the Packer/Tanner Memorial Show will prove even more violent and bloodier than you and anyone else shall realize. There shall be carnage and we shall destroy each other Syberus and there's nothing that anyone can do about it."

(He screams in a strange dialect.)

Psychotic Goth: "I shall make you suffer and suffer and suffer as you'll want to do the same. I don't care and I know you don't care either. We want to destroy the other and we'll do it no matter if we have to eliminate the referee. I know we won't care if we have to make the ring run red with blood. I don't care since it doesn't matter Syberus. As long as we settle this grudge once and for all. Then again nothing ever gets settled no matter what."

(He laughs.)

Psychotic Goth: "Everyone thought I was crazy and insane when I prophesied your return and surely enough you did return to the ring to face me. Yes you came to the ring and challenged me. So SWAT what do you think of my predictions and prophesying now. I'm making bad omens for you Syberus and they are going to be yours to remember as you shall see after before, during and our match is over. I shall come out on top and I shall make sure we end this once and for all. There shall be blood and lots of lots of blood."

(They turn and head for the hooded individuals and he places the framed photo in the large oil drum.)

Psychotic Goth: "Ode is to the hero who destroyed the promotion he ruled but couldn't keep to what he had and overreached. Tonight Syberus our wars shall come to an end. Or shall they come to an end. Our grudge shall be either sated or continue to pour more and more blood, pain and agony as well as carnage
that shall become more stained and bitter."

(He lights an match and drops it in the drum which lets our a thunderous roar as fire leads upwards and Psychotic Goth laughs and roars in a strange dialect.)

Psychotic Goth: "Yes Syberus look at the fires of hell. Look at the fires of purgatory as they rise and consume what is left of your soul oh Great Syberus. See te sins that are present for what you have done to Hardkore World and it's loyal participants. Now tonight I shall make sure your wages of sins are taken from you and you are left poor with only the glory and memories of that sorry moment. What could have been turn out be nothing more than a pipe dream that is empty without end."

(He turns around and lowers his head and raises his arms before slinging his head back revealing his pale handsome gothlike looks.)

Psychotic Goth: "Yes Syberus I shall take it all away from you in a matter of moments. I know you don't feel anything close to fear, but you should feel it and see it coming from all directions to consume you as it consumes your soul or what's left of it. I shall settled the score between us once and for all and if you don't feel it is settled we'll resume the bloodbath that was resumed last year in the old ACW. This is my edict. This is my proclamation. This is my omen and prophesy to you."

(Vampira hands him a velvet bag which he slings over his shoulder.)

Psychotic Goth: "WELCOME TO YOUR DEATH!"

(He roars and they leave as the camera pans slowly into the can and sees a brning picture of Syberus as the scene slowly fades to black and so does the tron.)

[SWAT Team]

Evil green mist bellows out of the ring entrance as a woman screams and Psychotic Goth laughing maniacally as "Welcome To Your Death" by Annihilator plays and Vampira leads Psychotic Goth to ringside in chains while holding Psychotic Goth's homemade weapon. He ignores the ringsiders and stops at the ring for Vampira to unlock the chains and Psychotic Goth rubs his wrists hard as he climbs the ringsteps and enters the ring and stands in his corner. He slowly takes off his trenchcoat and jewelry before he lowers his head and raises his arms before throwing his head back revealing his pale handsome gothlike looks looking and snarling like a demonic maniac crazed and intimidating as he is given his homemade weapon and he caresses it before placing it in his corner for Vampira to hold until it's time for Psychotic Goth to use it.

Frank Salazar : THE FOLLOWING MATCH IS SCHEDULED FOR ONE FALL!!! Introducing first, hailing from the depths of Hell, and coming in at 6’5 & 235 lbs .... PSYCHOTIC GOTH!!!!

"Gold" by Kiiara kicks in and the crowd explodes as stop motion clips of Syberus wrapping his wrist tape, pulling on his boots and tying his trunks, as well as him warming up etc. fill the screen. Syberus soon pushes through the curtain as the first verse starts and the crowd reaches meltdown. Syberus wears a classic "Connection" T-Shirt, a stylised gold "C" on a black shirt.

Jeremy Tucker : Arizona crowd hot for Syb Fulton, he enters the ring and mounts the turnbuckle, and OH MY GOD!!! Goth just attacked Syb while he was mounted on the turnbuckle, he cracked him in the back with the handle of that scythe!

Andrew Fulton : Goth kick starting this match up Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker : Goth mounts a fallen Syb and starts choking him with the handle of the scythe on Syb’s neck, Syb is gasping for air and the ref is trying to pull Goth off of Syb, Goth is a mad man!

Andrew Fulton : Syb tries to roll out of it, but Goth twists and grapevines the legs around Syb and continues choking him with the handle, now from behind pulling back on it.

Jeremy Tucker : Syb is holding onto the scythe and trying to block the choke with his hands, and Goth smashed him in the back of the head with a brutal head butt!

Andrew Fulton : Go Goth! Finish him off!

Jeremy Tucker : The match hasn’t even started yet! Goth with the Scythe! He is pushing the blade up on Sybs forehead, cutting him open, look at that blood gush! Wow!

Andrew Fulton : He is gonna scalp him!

Jeremy Tucker : Syberus is bleeding profusely, this is insane, the match hasn’t even started!

Andrew Fulton : The ref now is accompanied by three other refs and somehow they manage to pull Goth off of Syb. This is over before it even begins.

Jeremy Tucker : Head Referee Bo Brady goes over to Frank and starts talking to him, Frank nods.

Frank Salazar : I have just been informed, winner of the match, by disqualification .... SYBE ....

Syberus snatches the mic.

B]Syberus /b]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (Bellows Syb, a bloody mess.) This is not gonna end, like this, before it even starts. Ring the bell, this is just beginning!

Andrew Fulton : Syb drops the mic and the bell rings and Goth charges Syb but Syb meets him with a hard right strike.

Jeremy Tucker : Syb with another Strike, a 3rd! He is hot and Goth is reeling.

Andrew Fulton : Inverted atomic drop by Syb, he then puts his fingers into the face of Goth, and is gouging him.

Jeremy Tucker : Wow! Syb is bleeding like a stuck pig but taking it to Goth ... short arm clothesline!

Andrew Fulton : Syb wipes the blood out of his eyes and Goth goes in with a face gouge of his own.

Jeremy Tucker : Goth head buts Syb, cutting him open deeper, then nails a gut wrench suplex.

Andrew Fulton : Goth stomps away on Syb, drops an elbow but Syb rolls out of the way.

Jeremy Tucker : Syb grabs the leg of Goth and brings him down to the mat, then grapevines the leg and applies immense pressure.

Andrew Fulton : Goth reaches for the ropes, but Syb digs into his leg and stops him, Goth boots at Syb with his other leg, but Syb blocks it and rolls over into a one legged Boston Crab.

Jeremy Tucker : Goth reaches out and gets a rope break.

Andrew Fulton : Syb releases the Crab and dives in for a reverse chin lock. He holds it in and is choking the life out of Goth, thats illegal ref!

Jeremy Tucker : Syb getting his breathe back, has this chin lock in deep, and he loves to punish with these move!

Andrew Fulton : The crowd clapping along, whats wrong with these fools, its a damn REST hold!

Jeremy Tucker : Syb is the king of the head lock Fulton!

Andrew Fulton : Goth trying to escape, and Syb locking it in even more, this is dumb.

Jeremy Tucker : You’re dumb.

Andrew Fulton : Jerry, he is putting on this rest hold, cause he has lost so much blood, he can barely stand on his feet. Believe me, this match is as good as over.

Jeremy Tucker : We will see. Syb has great resilience, and stamina, he has matched it with the very best.

Andrew Fulton : So has Goth. All these hot shots when they face him, say the same old stick, your good, but not great, bah, he is the constant of great, every match, he gets it done, and the hot shots who come and go dismiss at their own peril.

Jeremy Tucker : Syb now choking Goth in the middle rope.

Andrew Fulton : Mule kick to the groin by Goth, breaks that up!

Jeremy Tucker : Goth mounts Syb and starts wailing away with vicious rights and lefts, and the blood is splattering across the ring,

Andrew Fulton : Are you a blood donor Jerry?

Jeremy Tucker : Syb makes it back to his feet, swings a left strike at Goth, but Goth evades, and Syb falls on wonky legs to the mat!

Andrew Fulton : He is done Jerry!

Jeremy Tucker :Goth picks up the wonky Syb ... electric chair!

Andrew Fulton : Thanks for the appearance Syb, see you next Memorial pal.

Jeremy Tucker : Cover by Goth


One ...............................

Two ...............................

Thr (kick out by Syb.)

Andrew Fulton : Wow.

Jeremy Tucker : Goth can’t believe it and he is admonishing Brady.

Andrew Fulton : Tell him Goth, that was three!

Jeremy Tucker : PURE CONFIDENCE!!!!

Andrew Fulton : NOOOOO!!!

Jeremy Tucker : Syberus hits the Pure Confidence DDT! Covers Goth ..............

ONE .......................

TWO ....................

THREE!!!!!

Andrew Fulton : Nooooooo!

Jeremy Tucker : Syberus got him! Unbelievable!

"Gold" by Kiiara blares and Brady raises the arm of a bloody Syberus in victory, the road agents then swarm the ring, and half help, half escort him to the back and the waiting paramedics, Goth glaring at him the whole way, shaking his head in anger and disbelief.

Frank Salazar : Winner of the match .... THE GREAT SYBERUS!!!!!!

[SWAT Team]

Glamorous Glenda from the Amazon announce team is backstage and she sees Marie Caedes, dressed in her ring gear, stretching against a wall. Marie sees Glenda coming but doesn’t run off although she wants to.

Glamorous Glenda: Marie! This is our first time getting a chance to speak to you. How you feel about tonight?

Marie pulls her dark auburn hair back and secures it with the hair tie she had around her wrist. She’s being careful about what she’s going to say.

Marie: How do I feel? Are you kidding? This is a HUGE show and this is a huge chance for me to show everyone, men and women, what I can do.

Glenda: What do you think of your competitors who say you’re too young to be doing this? I mean……have you even graduated high school?

Marie: Really? That’s what you want to know? **sighs** Ok I’m a senior in high school, my favorite color is light blue, I’m a third generation wrestler, my grandfather and five of my uncles have or are wrestlers as well as my mom and my dad. There I covered plenty of topics. Next.

Glenda: Well there is something in that I want to ask and that’s about your mom. I mean last show she became the General Manager of the Amazons.

Marie is starting to look exasperated at Glenda’s questions and is thinking about just walking away from the reporter. But she stands her ground for a few more minutes.

Glenda: Well now that you brought it up, how do you feel about her being GM of the Amazons. Are you expecting any special treatment.

Marie: Such as?

Glenda: Well like the cage match you’re in this evening. Do you think Delilah would have let you participate in it given your…..well lack of experience?

Marie: Given this match was probably already set up before my mom even thought about tearing Delilah apart, what can I say? I’m grateful for the chance and don’t intent to let anyone, and I mean anyone, whether they have wrestled for 20 years or 2 months to stand in my way. This match is actually perfect because I can show all the Amazons, show all of SWAT, show people like you, and show the fans and the rest of my family that I’m just as good as they are. Tonight makes a huge leap in my career because I’m not having to go through them in one on one matches, which might take a year…..or mean I don’t face a few because they quit.

Glenda: Speaking of the cage…..well Lynn is going to be in there as well.

Marie: And?

Glenda: You’re willing to fight your mom?

Marie: One of the first ….five things I was taught when it comes to ….I guess you could call it ring ethics is that sometimes you have to face family. It’s not easy but it happens. You still give it all you can.

Glenda is standing there, mouth open, eyes wide as if hearing Marie was going to take a giant shit in the middle of the ring.

Marie: Surprise you? Look yes she’s my mother but if I pinned the great Lynn Brewster? My career would LEAP to the top in one bound. Even she wouldn’t be able to deny my talent. But first things first. I have others that have to be eliminated before I can get in the 3rd cage. There are 20 women standing in my way. Think about it. A “rookie” (Marie makes air quotes with her fingers) winning the golden ticket? Would set the place on its ear.

Glenda: But then you’d be in the Helloween match and…..

Marie: And an 18 year old kid, with perhaps not as much experience as others, if I won? SWAT would take notice. One because of my age, and some would then say they wouldn’t expect less of a daughter of the great Lynn Brewster.

Glenda: Please just a couple more questions.

Marie rolls her eyes in exasperation but given this is her first interview, she’s trying to be patient. She does prop one leg up on a bench and finishes tying her boot.

Glenda: Since you brought up the idea, are you going to be watching your mom’s back? You know…..

Marie straightens up.

Marie: Are you asking if something is kicking the crap out of my mom will I watch or go after them?

Glenda: Yes.

Marie: I’ll go after them! I’m not some heartless bitch who would take pleasure in watching my mom get beat down. Then when it’s just her and me…….I’m getting ahead of myself. When I cross that bridge then I’ll think about it. Now I’m going.

Marie picks up her towel, tosses it over her shoulder and pushes by Glenda and the cameraman before the camera goes back to ringside.

[SWAT Team]

[As Marie moves off screen, Alice Brady walks in from the other side and sidles up to Glenda confidently. She has swagger. Alice is in her ring gear and ready to go Jack.]

Alice Brady : Family bonding, don’t you just love it Glenda.

Glenda : Oh (surprised). Hi there Alice.

Alice Brady : Hi there yourself. Marie, you don’t have to worry about any bridges Sugar, unless it’s me textbook bridge pinning your shoulders to the mat 1,2,3!

Glenda : This memorial has been going well Alice, next up the Amazons take centre stage ...

Alice Brady : The only place we belong. Glenda. This is the time, the time of the Amazons, the time of Alice Brady. I was the GM of this region and i assembled the best women in the land all under the one umbrella, sure Pesci and Delilah wanted to take my glory and he used me as a pawn in his battle with Suit

[Alice grins to the camera.]

Nice reveal by the way big guy. One golden ticket to YOU. Now is my turn, i hope to see you in that haunted house chocolate factory come Helloween.

Glenda : That would sure be something.

Alice Brady : If anyone in the Amazons deserves to be the one to carry our hopes against the guys, its ME! I have paved the way here, and i intend to continue to do so.

Glenda : There is a lot of competition who would think otherwise.

Alice Brady : No doubt, they all think they are qualified, yet where have they been, the opportunity is right in front of us, who has stood out above all others, to claim this time and spot her own, who Glenda?

Glenda : Ummmm .....

Alice Brady : Exactly! No one. Not a single Amazon. When opportunity presents itself, you seize it with both hands, you make it your own! You stand out from the crowd and you don’t hope you succeed, you make damn well sure you succeed, you reach out and you grab that opportunity, snatch the brass ring from any who think to stand in your way. Thats what i do! That’s what i have seen not one other Amazon do.

Glenda : Lots have spoken up and are trying.

Alice Brady : There is going through the motions Glenda, and there is standing out from all others. When no one stands out from the rest, guess who advances, the best viable option, who happens to glide by on what they may show in the future, well, the Future is right here and right now, and there will be no gliding by, there is only one viable prospect from the Amazons who can hang with the guys, as much as i am proud of all the girls i have assembled here, to stand up and go to that next level, well, you know what they say, if you want something done properly, you have to do it yourself.

Glenda : Do you really think you can compete and hold your own with the guys at Helloween?

Alice Brady : Compete and hold my own? No, i don’t think i am going to do that. I am not going to HOLD MY OWN! I AM GOING TO KICK THERE TESTOSTERONE JUICED UP PIMPLY ASSES!!!

Glenda : Yo ...

Alice Brady : (snatching the mic from Glenda) Amazons, get to steppin, this is my match, Kaycee Tanner ... this is for YOU!

[Alice charges off towards the ring.]

[SWAT Team]

(The show returns from commercials for the latest DVD releases, Arizona Ice Tea and a talk show promo with Joe Pesci before fading into the arena where the camera pans around the arena showing signs saying "Emperor Syberus Rules!" "The Psychotic One is King!"
Olympia is pure Gold!" "Jade's Got Wrench!" "Serve me please Alice!" and “Do some Damage Shannon!" before fading to Michelle Williams, Kathleen Parks and Dragonatrix and Jade who are wearing headsets.)

Michelle Williams: "Welcome back to the first ever Packer/Tanner Memorial Show and next up is something that both Dragonatrix and current SWAT Women's Champion Jade knows quite a bit about, and speaking of Jade, the Amazons Champ has decided to join us in commentary for this match before she competes in the main event Challenge of the Champions match up"

Kathleen Parks: "Considering the stakes are high I don't blame her. She's on a collision course with Avery McCullen and possibly the winner of this match."

Jade: "That's right Kathleen I want to see who I'm going to face. Believe me there's plenty of potential contenders in the cages and a lot of bad blood ready to spill."

Dragonatrix: "There's the Amazons version of a mob war going to explode even more when Joanne Cannelli and Candace Morelli. Then there's Suzi Spitz and 'Lucky' Linda La Fey and Avery McCullen."

Jade: "Anything can happen in a match like this and it will too, but one thing’s for certain it's going to be a bloodbath."

Michelle Williams: "When you have 22 women caged it's going to be like a prison riot. Of course let's not forget that whoever gets the most wins or submissions and survives the Three Cages of Fear Match wins the golden ticket."

Kathleen Parks: "This isn't going to be a Willie Wonka moment and everyone's going to be acting more like drunken greedy miners in a barroom brawl over a gold claim. Then there's the title shot or whoever has the title."

Jade: "I don't care who I face. The only opponent I care about is Avery McCullen. That's my focus and I'm not going to lose my focus. Frankly I don't care who wins because it's going to be bloodshed one way of the other."

Dragonatrix: "So far most of the participants are in the cages. I just wish that Lynn didn't allow Marie Caedes into the match. She isn't ready and she's going to be severely injured or have her career
ended too early. I even expressed my concerns to Lynn too."

Michelle Williams: "Don't tell me she refused to do so."

Dragonatrix: "Yes she refused to do so and then I offered to help train her and she still refused."

Kathleen Parks: "Well we could see a possible death in a SWAT Amazons match."

Michelle Williams: "Well Dragonatrix is known for her brutal honesty and speaking her mind. Right now let's go to the ring announcer for the rest of the introductions."

Frank Salazar : "Now coming to the ring they hail from Dublin, Ireland. They are the Irish Rose Bombshells Avery Mc Cullen and the former SWAT Amazons Women's Champion 'Lucky' Linda La Fey."

("Linger Cranberries" plays and The Irish Rose Bombshells storm the ring slapping hands and entering their assigned cage.)

Frank Salazar : "Now entering the ring from Frankfurt, Ky. She comes in at 6ft. Tall and weighs 215lbs She is the current General Manager of SWT Amazons Queen Wildcat Lynn Brewster.

("Cat scratch Fever" by Pantera plays and he ringsiders boo as Wildcat Lynn Brewster comes to ringside and gets into her assigned cage and continues to soak in the boos.)

Frank Salazar : "Now coming to the ring they are the Nerds of Wonderland Alice and the current SWAT Pan Amazons Women's Champion Erica Lindsay Rich."

("Revenge of the Nerds" the main theme from the 1984 movie "Revenge of the Nerds plays and Nerds in Wonderland come to ringside slapping hands before going into their assigned cage.)

Frank Salazar : "Now introducing The Troublesome Trio Erika Fox. Thalia and Karen."

('Love Disease" by Cash plays and The Troublesome Trio come to ringside in a sultry walk. Erika goes up to Jade and gets into her face.)

Erika: "Prepare to give up your gold old hag."

Jade: "Go sniff your partner's asses. Even better sniff your moronic boy toy Melvyn's ass."

Dragonatrix: "Get into your assigned cage Troublesome Trio and earn your way right now."

(They glare at each other before entering their cage."

Frank Salazar : "Now introducing from New Orleans. She is the former SWAT Amazons Women's Champion 'The Vicious Vixen' Suzi Spitz."

(Suzi Spitz comes to the ring to a mixed reaction and she signs a bottle of her spring water as Jade just shakes her head and rolls her eyes as Suzi Spitz enters her assigned cage..)

Jade: "As usual she's full of herself and I helped save her from Neela Shizeguma."

Dragonatrix: "Mistakes happen these days."

Frank Salazar: "Now coming to the ring from....."

(Joanne Cannelli stumbles out followed by the Mean Girls and Candace Morelli who is accompanied by Joey Morelli. The ringsiders boo but turns to cheers as Kim storms out and goes after the Mean Girls and Candace Morelli.)

Dragonatrix: "Excuse me....."

(She removes her headset and heads over to break up the assault.)

Dragonatrix: "CANDACE GET INTO THE CAGE AND YOU AND THE MEAN GIRLS HAD BETTER HOPE JOANNE CAN......"

(Joanne spears Candace and they roll around brawling and Dragonatrix again breaks them up.)

Dragonatrix: "I SAID GET INTO YOUR ASSIGNED CAGE AND JOEY MAKE SURE SHE GETS INTO THE CAGE RIGHT NOW!"

Joey Morelli: "Okay! Okay!"

(Joey rolls his eyes at Dragonatrix and they wait until Candace Morelli is in the cage before she allows both Kim and Joanne are in the assigned cage.)

Frank Salazar : "Now introducing Double Trouble Bonnie and Pamela."

("Femme Fatale" by CFO $ plays and Double Trouble comes to ringside and enters their assigned cage.)

Frank Salazar : "Now coming to the ring with special guest former Sheriff Joe Arpaio and introducing Shannon Damage."

(sheriff Joe Arpaio and a team of lawmen are leading Shannon Damage to ringside. She screams and lunges towards the fans who give her a better reaction than Sheriff Arpaio. She gets into her assigned cage and sits down racking back and forth ready to have a complete meltdown.)

Frank Salazar : "Now introducing from Olympia, Washington. She comes in at 6ft. tall an d weighs 130lbs. She was the first SWAT Pan Amazons Women's Champion and a former Olympic Gold Medalist .... Olympia!!!"

("The Olympic March" plays and Olympia comes to ringside and enters her assigned cage.)

Michelle Williams: "We're rejoined by Dragonaterix who's still in a foul mood after that assault on Joanne Cannelli."

Dragonatrix: "I'm supposed to enforce the rules and make sure the itinerary is followed. Besides, if you want to settle things do it in the ring or in the cage like real women do."

Kathleen Parks: "Yeah and there goes Shannon complaining about men being in this match."

Jade: "I don't know what her problem is but if she can't tell a male from a female she's definitely sick in the head."

Michelle Williams: "Joanne and Kim resume the brawl with Candace Morelli and The Mean Girls before the bell even sounds and now that the bell officially sounded while in cage two Shannon and Alice engage in a wild slugfest and it looks like the bad blood not just spilled already it's boiled over."

Kathleen Parks: "One of the understatements of the year. In the first cage The Mean Girls are double teaming the general manager who delivers a series of headbutts to both Wendy and Lizzie and then double clotheslines The Mean Girls. while in cage two Terry is going Wild, pun intended, on Roxanne Ryan who counters with a series of forearms."

Dragonatrix: "Double Trouble is working over Kitty Jones who's trying to fight back but the numbers game always wins. Believe me Kitty is way out of her league along with Marie Caedes. Olympia just dropkicked Pamela and then dropkicked Bonnie saving Kitty for the time being."

Jade: "That's Olympia's nature. Erica just went after Olympia which could be a big mistake on ELR's part. She whips Olympia in to the ropes and belly to belly suplex's her and covers her for a one count."

Michelle Williams: "Double Trouble attacks ELR and Olympia and they engage in a slugfest. Olympia gains the upperhand and whips Bonnie into the corner and stinger splashes her as Erica whips Pamela into her partner and does the same. A least Double Trouble's living up to their name when it comes to what's happening to them."

Kathleen Parks: "In the second cage Terry dropkicks Roxanne Ryan and then starts stomping on Roxanne. In the first cage Candice smashes Joanne's head repeatedly into the steel cage post relentlessly as Joey Morelli shouts and shakes the cage in encouragement while Shannon shakes the cage and looks at you Jade."

Shannon Damage: "ADMIT IT BITCH! ADMIT YOU'RE A FUCKIN MALE!"

Kathleen Parks: "Yeah she's definitely gone over the deep end. Shannon spears Alice and she rubs and scrapes Alice's head and face into the steel cage mesh and Alice is bleeding. She shows how hungry she is by biting into that cut."

Dragonatrix: "Wendy and Lizzie are taking turns and talking as if they are showing each other how to make an opponent bleed. Wendy digs her nails in to that bad cut and makes it worse and Lizzie shakes her head no and rubs and scrapes Kim's head worsening the cut before biting that cut. Kim has a wild look on her face and she wedgies both of them before executing a series of knife edges to their throats."

Jade: "In the second cage Linda and Suzie Spitz continue their wild brawl and back in cage one The Mean Girls are getting their asses kicked by The Troublesome Trio proving there's truly no honor amongst thieves."

Michelle Williams: "Lynn Brewster double chokeslams Cannelli and Morelli. She drops a series of knees on Morelli and then doing the same to Cannelli. Kitty whips Olympia into the ropes and gets dropkicked. Kitty attempts another dropkick but Olympia also executes a dropkick. Karen and Thalia deliver double knees to Kitty and Olympia."

Kathleen Parks: "Olympia is whipped into the corner but she counters with a Clothesline from Hell. Terry Wild attempts a clothesline and Olympia ducks and rolls forwards before springing up and Breaking News Olympia's attempting to gain the first submission of this match. She cinches in a rear naked choke on Terry Wild and it truly is in tight. Terry's attempting to break it but Olympia's tamping down tighter on it."

Dragonatrix: "I taught Olympia to be aggressive and that's what she's doing. The referee is checking and Terry Wild's fading but still attempting to resist. Olympia continues to apply pressure and Terry Wild finally taps out."

Ring Announcer: "At 8minutes and 30seconds Terry Wild has been eliminated."

Jade: "Olympia strikes early and eliminates Terry Wild. In the first ring Morelli just got busted open by Cannelli and she's opening a can of whoop ass ... she picks up Morelli who takes her legs out and they start rolling around punching each other hard. They get up and Candice low blows Joanne and snap suplexes Joanne before opening a can of whoop ass of her own. That seems to be making Joey Morelli even happier as she covered Joanne for a close two count and speaking of being happy Kim and Shannon seem to be enjoying choking each other to death."

Kathleen Parks: "So does the survivor of this match get charged with murder."

Jade: "No! You've been watching too many streaming crime dramas."

Kathleen Parks: "Thought so. The Mean Girls break it up and are working both over real good."

Dragonatrix: "That won't last long. Lynn Brewster is kicking the asses of The Troublesome Trio. I say go for it and give them a good slapping around."

Michelle Williams: "That's unusual even for you."

Dragonatrix: "They trashed the veterans of this roster and let's see if they back it up. Besides, I warned the newcomers not to act like posers and they obviously didn't get the message and now they'll see how it's like to have it delivered personally from the GM herself."

Jade: "Dragonatrix predicted it correctly as Kim and Shannon are fighting it out with the Mean Girls and Wendy and Lizzie are getting their just desserts or making fun of the veterans."

Michelle Williams: "In the second cage Linda and Suzi Spitz are continuing their battle while Avery beats up Roxanne Ryan and DDT's her and makes the cover but Double Trouble breaks the count."

Kathleen Parks: "Nerds of Wonderland attack Double Trouble and they start slugging it out with them. Erica and Alice double synchronized suplexs to Bonnie and Pamela and make the double cover.....One.....Two.....Thr......No! Double Trouble barely kicks out."

Dragonatrix: "Give Double Trouble credit for barely surviving up to this point. In cage one Marie Caedes clotheslines Karen and bodyslams her. She makes a weak cover for a two count. In cage two Olympia belly to back suplex's Avery hard into the ropes and her head bounces hard off the steel cage and ropes."

Jade: "Olympia said she was going to be twice as aggressive and she's a woman of her word. Suzi clotheslines Linda and then Olympia before opening up a can of whoop ass on all three of them. In cage one Troublesome Trio works over Lynn Brewster Erika tells Thalia and Karen something and waits as they whip Lynn into the ropes but Lynn counters with a double clothesline."

Michelle Williams: "Erika dropkicks Lynn who stumbles but remains on her feet. She foolishly tries another dropkick but misses. Candice sets Joanne up on the top turnbuckle and attempts a suplex but Joanne blocks it and counters with a cyclone DDT. She makes the cover for a two count."

Kathleen Parks: "Shannon and Kim just shredded The Mean Girls faces and heads open. Looks like they're not as mean and nasty or even pretty as they want to be after this match is over. Kitty just got chokeslammed by Alice and goes for the cover.....One.....Two....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 15minutes Kitty Jones has been eliminated."

Dragonatrix: "Alice is on her way to winning this match and a golden ticket. Joanne just busted Candice open and she's continuing to bite and dig her nails into that cut."

Jade: "Joey's screaming and he's climbing the fence and screaming like Shannon trying to escape the wacko ward. Joanne spits on Candice before charging and delivering a flying knee into the fence sending Joey Morelli and that over privileged and worthless ass onto the concrete floor. Candice charges and she delivers a flying knee to Joanne's back and now she returns the favor by rubbing and scraping Joanne's head into the steel cage mesh with twice as much savagery and she's bleeding now. Candice continues to return the favor by biting and digging into that cut before spitting on Joanne."

Michelle Williams: "The way these two are going at each other. This feud won't end until one of them is dead."

Kathleen Parks: "Please stop with the death references."

Michelle Williams: "Sorry."

Kathleen Parks: "Back in cage two Double Trouble and Nerds of Wonderland continue to battle hard. Alice whips Bonnie into the corner and Erica does the same with Pamela and they take turns trainwrecking them repeatedly and Double Trouble is definitely in double trouble."

Erica Lindsay Rich: "Did I do that!"

Kathleen Parks: "Yes you did Erica Lindsay Urkel Rich!"

Dragonatrix: "Alice sets up Bonnie for a 3-D and Erica executes a stunner before they make the double cover....One.....Two.....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 22minutes Double Trouble has been eliminated."

Jade: "So far nobody's had an advantage in this match. In cage one Kim and Shannon take their hatred for each other out on The Mean
Girls. Kim unleashes some vicious muy Thai kicks to Wendy's head and face busting her nose open while Shannon delivers a can of whoop ass on Lizzie."

Michelle Williams: "Shannon won't be denied as she delivers a series of headbutts to Lizzie's nose and busts her open real badly. Lynn sneaks up on both of them and she double chokeslams them. She covers KIm while looking at you Jade for a two count."

Jade: "She should win before actually having a staredown with me or anyone else. Shannon's all over Lynn Brewster with vicious kicks and punches but Lynn's no selling it. Believe me Shannon's mean, nasty and vicious but she's outmatched and out of her league since Lynn's much more of a maniac in the ring. I ought to know since we've had a whole lot of vicious wars ourselves in the past and I have the upmost respect for her."

Kathleen Parks: "Speaking of violent wars our two mafioso princesses are hitting the other with stiff forearms to the chest. Lynn continues to beat on Shannon who seems to be enjoying it. She screams and rams her head repeatedly into Lynn's mid-section."

Dragonatrix: "Kim's helping Joanne out as they doubleteam Candice much to Joey's anger and threats to Kim. She looks at him and dares him to climb the cage. He takes the bait and Kim delivers a vicious Muy Thai kick sending him down onto the hard concrete floor and onto his ass. Talking about well deserved."

Jade: " In cage two Olympia spears Karen and she belly to belly suplex's Thalia and does a vicious spinning head kick and all three are down."

Olympia: "Hurrah!"

Jade: "Olympia Olympic slams Karen and she cinches in The Golden Lock. Karen is screaming in pain and Olympia's applying the pressure with such relentlessness that Karen's screaming even louder."

Michelle Williams: "Karen just tapped out. In cage one Marie Caedes is getting doubleteamed by The Mean Girls and they are beating on her relentlessly."

Ring Announcer: "At 30minutes Karen has tapped out."

Kathleen Parks: "Olympia charges and dropkicks Linda. She starts grounding and pounding Linda who turns her around and returns the ground and pound. They roll back and forth throwing punches with a vengeance. Can I ask you a question Dragonatrix."

Dragonatrix: "What."

Kathleen Parks: "Was Olympia always like this when it came to her training to become a professional wrestler."

Dragonatrix: "She's always been competitive and will always be competitive."

Jade: "Linda and Olympia continue to battle the way they had when they had their title for title match and were still champions. They get back to their feet still brawling. In cage one Marie Caedes gets clotheslined by Lizzie and both Mean Girls take turns dropping vicious elbows onto her chest and head and Lizzie invites Wendy to cover her but she politely refuses and tells Lizzie to do the honors and she does for a close three count."

Michelle Williams: "Kim German supolex's Erica into the corner and she pounces off the turnbuckle pads. She jumps onto the top turnbuckle and grabs the cage and jumps off giving Erica a double boot to the face. She sets up Erica and executes a Death Valley Driver and goes for the cover.....One.....Two.....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 23minutes Erica has been eliminated."

Kathleen Parks: "Now it's just The Terrible One with only Thalia left. Shannon powerbombs Joanne Canelli and Candice just executed a diving clothesline on Shannon before making the cover for a close three."

Dragonatrix: "I guess nobody interferes with mob warfare specially with these two mafia princesses. Shannon looks steamed and both Canelli and Morelli continue to stomp on her but she's screaming and urging them both to bring it on...."

Shannon Damage: "Come on bitches! Is that the best you can do to little old helpless me! Let's see some real beatdown!"

Jade: "They may wish they never messed with Shannon Damage. Shannon gets up slowly as they continue to punch her before Shannon explodes violently with lefts and rights so vicious it knocks them both down. She picks up Joanne and begins to headbutt her relentlessly before doing the same to Candice."

Shannon Damage: "Hey Morelli you want a real woman! Here I am!"

Michelle Williams: "Joey looks sick after what Shannon just offered him. Meanwhile Lynn sees Wendy charging her and she delivers a devastating big boot. She drops an elbow to her head followed by a knee drop also to her head and makes the cover.....One.....Two.....
three."

Ring Announcer: "At 36minutes Wendy has been eliminated."

Kathleen Parks: "Well The Mean Girls have been eliminated by one of the old hags. Kim whips Thalia into the ropes and she spears her."

Dragonatrix: "Kim isn't done yet as she psyches herself up."

Kim: "Hurrah!"

Dragonatrix: "She picks up Thalia and positions her for a jackhammer and executes it with authority before double hooking the legs....One.....two.....three."

Ring Announcer: "At 38minutes Thalia has been eliminated."

Jade: "So far it looks all even but you never know who's going to pull ahead. Now the question is can Shannon put her affinity to throw away an opportunity for a golden ticket aside to actually win a title shot."

Michelle Williams: "In cage two Roxanne Ryan and Avery McCullen are exchanging punches put Avery's too much for her and decks her. She grounds and pounds her savagely and she picks her up and whips her into the ropes and Brogue kicks her before going for the cover......One.....Two......Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 40minutes Roxanne Ryan has been eliminated."

Kathleen Parks: "In cage one Marie Caedes is getting her face smashed into the steel cage post and then getting it grinded into the steel cage mesh and she's bleeding badly by Shannon Damage and she gets into Marie's ear...."

Shannon Damage: "Welcome to the big time fresh meat! Welcome to my fucking world!"

Kathleen Parks: "Seriously. Shannon sets her up and she piledrives Marie Caedes with authority and makes the cover One....Two....Morelli saves her and Shannon's steamed."

Dragonatrix: "That's wrestling. Shannon explodes on Morelli and again smashes her head into the steel cage post relentlessly in front of Joey Morelli....."

Shannon Damage: "Hey big boy! What are you going to do now! Teach little old helpless me a lesson!"

Jade: "Yeah that will really work on Shannon Damage."

Michelle Williams: "Linda clotheslines Olympia and Avery continues her battle with Suzie Spitz."

Kathleen Parks: "What do you think of Marie Caedes chances now far into this match."

Dragonatrix: "Honestly slim to nil chances though I give her plenty of credit for guts and being game but she still needs more training. Alice clotheslines both Olympia and Linda. Erica is exchanging punches with Avery but misses with a wild roundhouse right and Avery counters with an atomic drop suplex."

Jade: "In cage one Candice Morelli snake eyes Joanne Canelli and plays some sweet chin music before making the cover.....One.....Two....Three. Joey Morelli just celebrated that pinfall."

Michelle Williams: "Shannon Damage just caught Candice and she executers a stunner.....One....Two.....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 48minutes both Candice Morelli and Joanne Canelli have been eliminated."

Kathleen Parks: "Looks like Joey Morelli celebrated well too soon."

Dragonatrix: "Another understatement. Kim and Lynn continue their battle of attrition exchanging brutal elbows to the head. Kim screams at Lynn who forearms her in the chest and Kim answers back with one of her own."

Jade: "Both continue to scream and bellow at each other daring the other to bring it on hard and they do. They continue to stagger the other but refuse to go down and they still dare the other to bring it on. Shannon climbs to the top turnbuckle and flies off executing a double clothesline screaming and bellowing as she beats her chest."

Michelle Williams: "Looks like Shannon's feeling it now just like Lynn and Kim. She spears Lynn and then spears Kim before she opens up a can of whoop ass screaming like a maniac. She jumps on Kim's chest first and then jumps on Lynn's chest before looking at you Jade."

Shannon Damage: "This is a small taste of what's to come Jade! I'm coming for you Jade and I'm going to kill you fucking bitch!"

Jade: "Oh shut up you crazed shithole and concentrate on earning your golden ticket!"

Kathleen Parks: "Like that's going to happen."

Dragonatrix: "Lynn's been resting and biding her time. She clotheslines Shannon with authority. She whips Shannon into the ropes and misses with a big boot. Shannon bounds off the opposite ropes and counters with a flying forearms."

Jade: "Against any other opponent that would have been effective but Lynn's too strong and too tall for Shannon. Lynn bellows and so does Shannon and both are determined to show who is the craziest."

Kathleen Parks: "Well whichever one survives will be considered crazy."

Michelle Williams: "You may have a point. In the second cage Erica covers Olympia for a close two count as Alice and Erica work over Olympia. They whip Olympia into the ropes but miss with a double clothesline. Olympia stops and waits before executing a German suplex onto Erica and then delivers one to Alice. I think this has taken a lot out of them."

Kathleen Parks: "Does Lynn and Shannon fit in to that category. Suzi just rolled up Erica .... One .... Two .... No! She kicks out and Erica's looking upset and could turn into The Incredible Hulk. She waits and spears Suzi Spitz."

Dragonatrix: "Experience always wins out. Erica may have made a serious mistake by using one of Olympia's prized moves. Believe me the Olympic Slam is one of her favorite moves and then she cinches in a sharpshooter but Olympia psyches herself into a rage and spears Erica right out of her sneakers."

Jade: "Just goes to show that you don't make fun of someone like Olympia or copy her moves either. She grounds and pounds Erica without mercy after what she did. Olympia cinches in a knee bar and Erica's screaming in agony and the look on Olympia's face tells us she means business."

Michelle Williams: "Alice saves her partner by dropping an elbow on Olympia and spears Suzi Spitz into Avery McCullen and the dropkicks Linda. Suzi pushes off Avery and sneaks up on Linda and rolls her up using the tights but Linda kicks out at two."

Kathleen Parks: "Avery delivers a Brogue kick to Suzi Spitz She waits and legdrops Suzi to the back of her head and goes for the pin. Erica breaks it up and Linda dropkicks Erica and we have a big pile up in the center of the ring."

Dragonatrix: "Olympia is about to make it a bigger pile up as she climbs to the top turnbuckle and and she moonsaults wiping almost everyone out."

Jade: "Back in cage one Kim and Shannon continue their bloody battle exchanging real stiff elbows and they refuse to back down. These two are showing that they really want to fight and they have no intention of backing down or giving ground or any quarter."

Michelle Williams: "Lynn quickly breaks that up with a double chokeslam. She makes the cover but both kick out. Lynn's really steamed about that."

Kathleen Parks: "I don't think Lynn's really steamed just pissed off that they were able to kick out at the same time. She continues assaulting them by delivering devastating double axehandles to their backs."

Dragonatrix: "Back in ring two Alice is climbing to the top of the cage and I hope she isn't thinking what I think she's doing.....Oh god. Alice just executed a 720 spinning Molly go Round ... the TOP YOU OFF!!! and connects with the rising Olympia and the big pile of others in the cage ala Air Alice."

Jade: "Alice should stick to just waiting tables and wrestling since she is no pilot. Hell if she flew an airplane the passengers would land in an abandoned airport and then find out she flew them into a dimension where they were attacked by furry flying creatures called Langoleers."

Kathleen Parks: "I wouldn't be surprised if that happened. They would have been even more surprised the stewardess serving the drinks and food was the one flying the airplane."

Michelle Williams: "What is Alice doing now."

Kathleen Parks: "How should I know. Alice is an idiot when it comes to poor choices of opponents to call out."

Dragonatrix: "Looks like Alice is climbing the cage again and is trying to get into cage one for some reason....."

Kathleen Parks: "That strange reason is a crazed maniac named Shannon Damage."

Dragonatrix: "Well Alice just pulled out some heavy duty cutters and is starting to cut the steel cage mesh. She's making a very large hole into the wall and then starts working on the other cage wall and slips into cage one."

Jade: "Alice is climbing to the top of the cage again. Damage slams Lynn to the mat, then slams Kim. Alice is perched and flies ... and executes another 720 spinning Molly Go Round onto Shannon wiping her out even though it's against the rules of this match."

Michelle Williams: "That's subjective. Alice backstabber on Shannon Damage and she goes for the pin....One.....Two.....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 55minutes Shannon Damage has been eliminated."

Michelle Williams: "Well the first ever pinfall by a competitor sneaking into another cage. Shannon is steamed and she goes into her tights and pulls out a pair of brass knuckles and she hits Alice hard knocking her out. She screams and starts kicking and stomping her mercilessly."

Kathleen Parks: "Well another first Shannon is pinned but still is participating in this match. Lynn hooks alice and chokeslams her, then covers 1 ................ 2 ....................3!!! Alice is eliminated! Lynn kicks the door open and throws Alice out and Shannon follows her out and they continue to brawl all over the ringside area and into the backstage area in what is yet another first."

Ring Announcer: "At 57minutes both Alice and Shannon Damage have been eliminated."

Dragonatrix: "So far it's mother-daughter Lynn Brewster and Marie Caedes along with Kim. In cage two it seems to be 'Lucky' Linda La Fey, Avery McCullen, Suzi Spitz, Olympia and Erica Lindsay Rich. Believe me things are going to be real interesting after this."

Jade: "Looks like it since Erica will probably have an injured knee after what Olympia did and she could be vulnerable in the Challenge of Champions Match. In cage one Mary Caedes is asking to start off the match but Lynn refuses to let her and for good reason. Believe me Kim could care less who starts off as long as she faces someone. Marie Caedes goes over and gets in Kim's face and that's another reason for her to not start off this match."

Michelle Williams: "In cage two all four meet in the center of the ring and are going at it. Erica and Olympia start exchanging stiff elbows which is an error on Erica's part due to Olympia's martial arts experience as a trained striker. Erica's no wimp either but believe me Olympia's much more tougher and a much more aggressive competitor."

Kathleen Parks: "Which makes it even more dumber for her to test an angry Olympia after she copied her moves. She should be smarter than that. All the more reason for Erica to retire and invent indestructible furniture. Linda and Avery doubleteam Suzi Spitz and are giving her a well deserved beatdown. Olympia whips Erica into the ropes and powerslams her and covers Erica for a close three count."

Dragonatrix: "Linda clotheslines Olympia and she opens up a can of whoop ass on her and Avery does the same to Suzi Spitz. In cage one Kim continues to dominate Marie Caedes and introduces her to the steel cage mesh. Lynn just shakes her head and charges delivering a stiff knee to Kim's back."

Jade: "Why am I not surprised. Lynn whips Kim into the ropes and she powerslams Kim with authority. Marie crawls over and makes the pinfall despite Lynn's objections. No matter Kim gets a shoulder up and Marie is pounding on the mat."

Michelle Williams: "While Marie is having her pout fest in cage two Avery and Linda whip Erica and Olympia into the ropes and double dropkick them. They go for a double cover for a close three count. Avery picks up Olympia who counters with a series of stiff lefts followed by a series of stiff European uppercuts and a knife edge to her throat."

Kathleen Parks: "Olympia rolls her up for a close three count but once again she sees Erica copying her Olympic Slam again and then in to an ankle lock. She angrily charges and delivers a flying knee to Erica's head and delivers a series of knife edges to Erica's throat."

Dragonatrix: "That's what happens when you copy someone else's moves. Olympia grabs that bad leg and Erica tries to counter with an enziguiri but Olympia ducks and transitions quickly into The Golden Lock. She quickly transitions into a knee bar forcing Erica to tapout."

Ring Announcer: "At 60minutes Erica Lindsay Rich has been eliminated."

Jade: "That's what makes Olympia so dangerous and that's her quick transitions ad that she shows no mercy to her opponents."

Michelle Williams: "That leaves Lynn Brewster, Kim, Avery McCullen, 'Lucky' Linda La Fey, Suzi Spitz, and Olympia remaining in this match. The big question is whether Erica will have enough left or be able to survive that brutal submission by Olympia for the Challenge of Champions match."

Kathleen Parks: "Back in cage one Lynn directs Marie Caedes to hold Kim. She bounds into the ropes and Kim ducks a big boot. Kim rolls Marie Caedes up and eliminates Marie Caedes."

Ring Announcer: "At 61minutes Maries Caedes has been eliminated."

Dragonatrix: "That seems to leave five and in cage two someone has just entered and just as Linda is pinning Suzi Spitz and Avery was just about to pin Olympia respectively. Linda sees the mystery person attack and knock out Avery and rolls Olympia onto Avery but it's too late. Suzi sneaks up and she rolls Linda up using the tights.....One....Two.....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 63minutes 'Lucky' Linda La Fey and Avery McCullen have been eliminated."

Dragonatrix: "Olympia's now leading despite the dubious interference tainting her pinfall of Avery McCullen. Still who was that person and why target Avery McCullen."

Kathleen Parks: "Let's see you were here. Jade was definitely here and that eliminated you two. Could be Shannon who wouldn't be that crazy."

Jade: "I'd like to know who it was too. However, the final four are now set between Lynn Brewster and Kim in cage one and Suzi Spitz and Olympia in cage two."

Michelle Williams: "You said it best Kathleen about the stakes being quite high and now we're about to see who goes to the top cage and battle for the golden ticket. In cage one Kim and Lynn lock up and waste no time exchanging punches."

Kathleen Parks: "In cage two Olympia and Suzi Spitz lock up and Olympia takes Suzi down with a waistlock takedown and Suzi reverses it and both grapple on the mats which isn't a good idea with Olympia. They reach the ropes and Olympia breaks cleanly."

Dragonatrix: "Once again Olympia's nature comes out along with her martial arts experience. She whips Suzi into the ropes and flying leg clotheslines her and makes the cover for a close three count."

Jade: "In cage one Lynn forces Kim into the ropes and pummels Kim hard. Lynn whips her into the ropes and delivers a big boot to her face. She drops a series of devastating elbows before making the cover for a close three count."

Michelle Williams: "Olympia bodyslams Suzi and delivers a knee to her head. She waits and attempts to cinch in a rear naked choke but Suzi counters with an elbow followed by an atomic drop suplex. Suzi's showing her experience."

Kathleen Parks: "In cage one Kim and Lynn are exchanging chops and Kim's psyching herself up. She delivers another chop and Lynn counters with the same thing. and Kim bellows and beats her chest. Lynn obliges and let's her have it and Kim staggers but counters with a knife edge to Lynn's throat."

Dragonatrix: "In cage two Suzi is attempting to take Olympia's legs right from under her but Olympia sprawls blocking it. Olympia lifts up Suzi and she powerbombs her for a close three. In cage one Kim and Lynn continue to exchange forearms to the chest."

Jade: "Like me Kim won't back down from any opponent. Kim starts kicking at Lynn's legs and she's staggering into the ropes. Kim charges and delivers a flying running knee to Lynn's chest and then Kim goes for the Thai clinch and delivers powerful knee strikes to Lynn's head."

Michelle Williams: "Lynn's staggering and is on wobbly legs but we saw this before and what's coming afterwards....."

Kathleen Parks: "Which sums what's coming right up correctly."

Michelle Williams: "You got that right. Kim psyches herself up and quickly goes in for the kill...."

Kathleen Parks: "Please don't say kill when Jake and Kim are involved."

Jade: "You can bet on that when someone says something stupid."

Kathleen Parks: "Please don't mention that. Kim gets onto the top rope and is pounding Lynn with stiff lefts and rights but Lynn shoves her off. Kim remains relentless and continues to throw those stiff kicks but Kim counters with a knee."

Dragonatrix: "Lynn waits for Kim to get up and she executes a Catatonic and she makes the cover.....One.....Two.....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 68minutes Kim has been eliminated."

Jade: "Now it comes down to Olympia and Suzi Spitz. They both continue to exchange stiff chops but remain standing. Suzi delivers a knee to Olympia's mid-section followed by a jumping DDT. She makes the cover but only gets a close three count."

Michelle Williams: "Suzi sets Olympia up for a tombstone piledriver but Olympia counters and reverses it. She makes the cover.....One......Two.....T....No! Suzi gets an arm up. Both these women want that chance at that golden ticket.:

Kathleen Parks: "Who wants it the most. Olympia whips Suzi into the ropes and Suzi sunset flips Olympia who rolls out and diving dropkicks Suzi. She goes for the cover and still gets a close three count. Olympia sets Suzi up in a Death Valley Driver but Suzi floats out of it."

Dragonatrix: "That's Suzi's experience. Suzi just pedigreed Olympia and goes for the cover.....One.....Two.....Thr.....No! Olympia gets an arm up. Suzi signals the end and goes to the top rope as Olympia gets up and executes a jumping backstabber and makes the cover.....One....Two.....Three."

Ring Announcer: "At 75minutes Olympia has been eliminated."

Jade: "Lynn is already in the cage rested a little bit and is waiting for Suzi to climb into the third cage which is a Hardkore World competitor's dream store of weapons."

Michelle Williams: "You can bet everyone's going to enjoy Lynn and Suzi using them to continue the bloody battle. Lynn wastes no time stomping on Suzi's head and then reaches for some barbed wire. She wraps it around Suzi's face and head and pulls backwards mauling the 'Vicious Vixen's' head and face."

Kathleen Parks: "Yeah Suzi's the 'Vicious Vixen' but Lynn's twice as vicious and she's the Queen of SWAT Amazons and twice as vicious. She continues her assault on Lynn's face and head before letting go and sees a baseball bat and picks it up and pats it on her boot as if she's preparing to go to bat and then cracks it over Suzi's back......Oh great here comes Lynn's daughter Marie Caedes."

Dragonatrix: "This isn't good news for Lynn since every time Marie comes out it becomes more of a bad omen for Lynn. She sees her daughter and tells her to leave ringside but Marie is pleading to help her. Suzi sneaks up to Lynn and attempts a backstabber but Lynn holds onto the steel cage mesh and Suzi stumbles away."

Jade: "Marie just can't take a hint. She enters the third steel cage and Lynn doesn't even see her as Lynn picks up a bag of tacks and empties it onto the canvas. She sets Suzi up and piledrives her onto those tacks and Suzi is screaming and thrashing in agony."

Michelle Williams: "It doesn't get any better for Suzi as Lynn picks her up by the hair and bloodies Suzi even more as she smashes her head into the steel cage post. Lynn attempts to do it again but Suzi blocks it and she returns the favor."

Kathleen Parks: "Looks like Suzi has a bit of life in her after all. She starts pummelling Lynn with her fists and then starts kicking her legs. Lynn shoves her away and as Suzi moves in Lynn unleashes a devastating clothesline flooring Suzi. Lynn drops a leg on her and makes the cover ..... One .... Two ...... Thr ...... No! Suzi gets a shoulder up. What is Marie's problem. Lynn tells her to leave but she refuses and ignores her as if she has something to prove. During this heart to heart conversation Suzi crawls over and finds a Kendo stick. She whacks it over Lynn's head and uses the remains to jam it into both Marie's and Lynn's mid-sections."

Dragonatrix: "Suzi finds a barbed wire baseball bat and she smashes it over Lynn's back and then does the same with Marie who's screaming in agony. Suzi opens up a can of whoop ass on Lynn and continues to stomp a mud hole into her and then does the same with Marie."

Jade: "Suzi whips Marie into the corner and she trainwrecks her and Marie slumps down onto the canvas. Lynn takes the time to sneak up on her and she trainwrecks Suzi with aurthority."

Michelle Williams: "Lynn whips her into the ropes and she tilt-a-whirl backbreakers Suzi and holds her in an over the knee backbreaker. She continues to apply pressure as the referee checks to see if she'll submit but Suzi shakes her head and refuses. She kicks Lynn in the head six times before Lynn's forced to release the hold."

Kathleen Parks: "Lynn picks her up and she bodyslams Suzi with authority. She continues to kick and grind her boot into Suzi's head. Marie hasn't stirred for a few moments as much as Lynn doesn't need her."

Dragonatrix: "Lynn splashes onto her and goes for the cover and gets a really close three count. She picks Suzi up and Suzi delivers a series of European uppercuts but Lynn counters with a series of vicious axehandles. Suzi headbutts Lynn hard and low but Lynn grips her by the waist and she powerbombs her for another close three count."

Jade: "Marie is slow and she stirs trying to use the ropes to get back onto her feet. She stumbles over and insists she wants to help out despite Lynn's reluctance and tells her to find the sledgehammer and she brings it over and Lynn smashes it into Suzi's stomach repeatedly while Marie kicks Suzi's back."

Michelle Williams: "Well this is going to be quite interesting since Marie makes this into a faux handicap match, though that won't stop someone like Suzi Spitz. She whips Suzi into the ropes and Bubba Slams her."

Kathleen Parks: "Marie drops a couple of knees onto Suzi's head despite Lynn's objections, but makes the cover ...... One ..... Two ..... Thre ..... No! Suzi barely gets a shoulder up and Lynn's steamed."

Dragonatrix: "That's not a good look for anyone to have. Suzi attempts to fight back but Lynn's just too powerful physically. Suzi just throws a series of vicious knees and then executes a reverse neckbreaker and makes the cover..... One ..... Two .... Th ..... No! Suzi barely gets an arm up again."

Jade: "Suzi's barely surviving this match. Lynn prepares to chokeslam her but Suzi uses elbows and breaks it up. she delivers a series of elbows to Suzi's head and face but Lynn counters with a series of headbutts knocking Suzi to the canvas as Lynn shakes her head to get the cobwebs out."

Michelle Williams: "This match has taken a lot out of the competitors and it's taking sheer will to just be standing. Whoever wins will be nursing a whole lot of wounds and is going to be in lots of pain and will be walking around like a mummy."

Kathleen Parks: "Marie starts kicking Suzi and she whips her into the ropes but Suzi delivers a flying shoulder tackle and Lynn gores her as she gets up."

Dragonatrix: "Something bad is going to happen. Marie stirs and she sees an electric cattle prod as Lynn picks up Suzi and has her arms pinned. Marie grabs the taser and raises the electric cattle prod like it's some sort of victory weapon, Lynn telling her to get the hell out of there"

Jade: " Lynn transitions into a surfboard telling her daughter take a hike and an angry Marie lunges in withe taser but Suzi barely slips out of Lynn's grip and Marie uses the taser and electric cattle prod on her mother."

Michelle Williams: "Suzi quickly rolls up Lynn and uses the tights as leverage as the referee counts.....One .... Two ..... Three!!!!!"

Ring Announcer: "At 90minutes here is your winner of the golden ticket 'Vicious Vixen' Suzi Spitz."

Michelle Williams: "Suzi Spitz wins!!! Suzi wins!!!!."

Dragonatrix: "Let no one say THAT SWAT Amazons doesn't create or pioneer firsts. Suzi has climbed down from cage three and is now asking for a microphone."

Kathleen Parks: "Let's hear what the golden ticket winner has to say."

Suzi Spitz: "Twenty two women entered these two cages and one woman won that golden ticket and that winner is ME.....Suzi Spitz!"

(The ringsiders boo.)

Suzi Spitz: "Boo all you damned well bloody want but you are looking at THE SWAT WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!"

C.O.D. by AC/DC hits and Suzi mounts the top of the cage victoriously with her Golden ticket

[SWAT Team]

The scene opens on the backstage area where we see Avery walking through the long hallway, with an ice pack over her eye. The match hadn't gone the way she wanted, but she still managed to last a bit longer then most. Joanne and Candice tore each other apart along with anyone else that stood in their way. e rounds the corner, and sees Glamorous Glenda. She smiles as Avery moves toward her.

Glamorous Glenda: Miss McCullen... Can I get a few words with you about your match?

Avery: Sure.

Glamorous Glenda: You managed to last almost to the end of the match. I have to say that it is an accomplishment.

Avery: It was, but I wanted to get to the end and go onto the big match in October. But it's alright. I have my sights set on something else...

Glamorous Glenda: It's good to see that you have a positive outlook.

Avery: You have to in this line of business. But I guess I was a bit distracted.

Glamorous Glenda: From what?

Avery: Jade... It was something that she said...

Glamorous Glenda: That she wanted to face off against you?

Avery: Something along that line... I'm ready anytime to face off against her. I'm not afraid of her or anyone else for that matter.

Glamorous Glenda: I have no doubt. Is there anything you want to say to Jade?

Avery: No... She'll hear from me soon enough...

Avery walks off leaving Glamorous Glenda alone as the scene fades to black.

[SWAT Team]

We switch to the locker room and Paul Soutter is in his room with none other than his former bodyguard, The Compton Colossal, Bruno. Suit is untying his wrist tape and still in his ring gear and Bruno is in a black SWAT muscle top and black sun glasses, he is JACKED.

Soutter : (clasping hands enthusiastically with Bruno) Hey Dawg! Great to see ya. The Sovereign is back in town!

Bruno : Great win boss.

Soutter : Fierce and the Fairtex girls saw it coming and stood there like deer’s stuck in the head lights.

Bruno : You’re a Menace to Society!

Soutter : Malyce proved himself, he has true blue got my back, he and Murmur have been great with Massacre.

Bruno : I knew you had it in you, come Helloween, the world title will surely be yours.

Soutter : Now i am free from the conflict of ownership of the fed, that World title has my name written all over it. First was this golden ticket, next is the world title, then, look out Pesci, the company will be coming back to the Sovereign. How is it going with Pesci?

Right on queue, Joe Pesci walks into the locker room.

Peaci : Well, well, well. What do we have here. My old best friend and turn coat Mad Dog Paul Soutter, or is it Menace? Either way, and my new body guard and ‘trusted’ employee Bruno, just like old times, hey guys?

Bruno : ..... (says nothing, just glares at Pesci thru the sunglasses.)

Soutter : Hey there Joe. Welcome to the party.

Pesci : (whiny mocking voice) ‘Welcome to the party.’ Fuck your party pal. How bout that! This is MY show! You think you’re so great, putting on your dumb Menace mask, everyone knew it was you all along. I couldn’t even fire you if i wanted to, that fucken legends clause. You may have a golden ticket, what a pointless charade, but there is half a dozen other wrestlers going in that Haunted House. Suzi Spits! James Fierce! The Fairtex Brothers! BETTER THAN SEX!!!

Soutter : (laughing) There is nothing Better Than Sex. I just beat three of them right THEN! Viper, you tried to set him onto me at Battleground, all you got was a riot and a dozen law suits.

Pesci : (grumbling about the law suits) Win some lose some.

Soutter : You’re meant to point your fingers when you do that. Win some. (points to himself.) Lose some. (points to Pesci)

Pesci : Everything is a big joke to you! You know who gets the last laugh, Italians! We will be laughing when you are six foot under! Maybe Eight foot with that girth!

Soutter : Italians. Ha! Yeah, hows Chianti going? Your own nephews wife turned on you humps, and where does he stand in all that? I know where he doesn’t stand, with a GOLDEN TICKET!

Pesci : He is family. We will sort it out, and we will SORT YOU OUT!

Soutter : Two matches to go, how you going to top what we just saw from the Amazons?

Pesci : Well, Beelzebozo and Vile will knock it out of the park, and then ... the main event, i have a big announcement regarding the Challenge of the Champions!

Soutter : What’s that?

Pesci : It’s now .... A LADDER MATCH!

Soutter : Not bad. I like it.

Pesci : Bruno, lets go, and in future, watch who you associate yourself with, this guy will do you no good, you gotta keep away from the riff raff, if i have told you once, i have told you a thousand times, you work for ME now! Let’s go. Suit, we got a date waiting sooner than you think, a hot date in the hot desert sun.

Scene fades with Joe turning his back on Suit and power walking out of the room, motioning for Bruno to follow, Suit gives Bruno a nod and he goes off with Joe.

[SWAT Team]

The scene opens on the backstage area where we see a locker room door open slightly. The sound of what could be growls mixed with screams are heard coming from within. The camera moves to the interior where we see Joanne standing in the middle of the destroyed locker room, with her hair falling over her face as the door opens and we see Reno and Rude walking in. She growls slightly and her eyes flash red before going back to normal and her breathing starts to slow.

Reno: Boss, its just us.

She pushes her hair back from her face, and sits down on a chair that Rude fixed for her.

Rude: Damn, it looks like an...

Joanne: What? An animal came through? I know! I was so close!

Reno: Yeah but Candice was put out at the same time as you were. She didn't any further either

Joanne smirks as she leans against the dented lockers.

Joanne: I know. But I would have given anythin' to get that ticket.

Rude: You don't need it boss. You're better than that bitch that got it anyway. You have a bigger problem anyway.

Joanne: Candice...

Rude: Damn right.

Joanne: Don't worry I have somethin' in mind for her. It will be the end of her, or myself...

Reno: You can't mean...

Joanne: I do.. It will be a match for the ages... And one she will never live through.

Rude: I'll make the call boss, and have it started.

Joanne: Good... This is the perfect way to end her... And show the world the beast that I have become.

Her eyes flash red once again, as she begins to laugh and the scene fades to black.

[SWAT Team]

Jeremy Tucker: Well fans... our next match takes us out of the arena.

Andrew Fulton: That’s right, TripleV has challenged Beelzebozo to meet him at an abandoned carnival.

Jeremy Tucker: These two have had a long running rivalry to see who was the most malevolent, horrible...

Andrew Fulton: Motherfucker.

Jeremy Tucker: Language Andrew... as I was saying, to decide which was the most despicably cruel and crazy monster in the history of Syndicate Wrestling. For the past year, they have been at constant odds. Viper cost Beelzebozo both the royal rumble and Anzac Cup, while the clown denied Viper the ACW heavyweight title.

Andrew Fulton: Its INSANELY rare for TripleV to stick around a federation this long without a title, so you know that pissed him off to NO END.

Jeremy Tucker: In SWAT Europe, their general contempt got significantly more personal, as Viper seemingly ended the career of everyone favourite SWAT wrestler - and Buster’s best friend, The Industrial Man Attila Balan.

Andrew Fulton: If you thought Beelzebozo was unhinged before? I really wouldn’t want to be Viper tonight!

Jeremy Tucker: Their first encounter for the ACW title, and the Anzac Cup confrontation between Funny Business and Better Than Sex are considered SERIOUS match of the year contenders. Despite the unusual setting, this promises to be quite the...

Andrew Fulton: Snuff film.

Jeremy Tucker: Yeah. Parents, please send your children to bed, this promises to both be brutally ugly, and the greatest thing they will ever see. Its all downhill from here.

CARNIVAL FEED

The video feed cuts to the Sonoran desert.

"Beelzebozo" Buster Friendly staggers through the sand with a whisky bottle in his hand. He almost trips over another whisky bottle. Is he going in circles? The intense heat that comes with wearing a trenchcoat in this barren landscape allows the Atlantic Coast champion to get drunker faster. Science.

Beelzebozo: Balan...

Already incomprehensibly drunk, the red eyed clown curses as he notices the sun setting. Going to get cold soon. As the sky turns magenta, neon lights spark up in the horizon. Are those circus tents, or a mirage?

Brandon Young: You too?

Looking over, Beelzebozo finds himself standing next to Adrian Tanner Jr.’s childhood friend, Brandon Young, and the killer miniature robot, Soundy.

Brandon Young: It gets hard this time of year. Like... close to it.

Beelzebozo looks back down at his bottle of hooch. Some of the pills floating in it haven’t dissolved yet.

The tiny robot tugs on Brandon Young’s pant leg, gesturing towards the big tops ahead of them.

Brandon Young: My buddy here is taking me to a fair to get my mind off of it. Some people say he’s just a robot, but I wouldn’t trade him for the world.

Buster Friendly slowly nods, half listening but appreciating the sentiment. Recognizing a quiet drunk when they see one, Brandon and Soundy start heading towards the circus. Beelzebozo looks back down at his whisky bottle, then drops it into the sand.

Beelzebozo: Not going to drink myself to death... just yet.

Empowered with the healthy living that comes from embracing revenge, Buster Friendly starts to follow the remains of NextWave towards the menacing menagerie in the distance.

The camera follows after him... its a feel good moment, but its still going to take a few minutes to get over their, so lets set their stroll to some music.

#Risin' up, back on the street#
#Did my time, took my chances#
#Went the distance, now I'm back on my feet#
#Just a man and his will to survive#
#So many times, it happens too fast#
#You trade your passion for glory#
#Don't lose your grip on the dreams of the past#
#You must fight just to keep them alive#
#It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight#
#Risin' up to the challenge of our rival#
#And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night#
#And he's watchin' us all with the eye of the tiger#
#Face to face, out in the heat#
#Hangin' tough, stayin' hungry#
#They stack the odds 'till we take to the street#
#For the kill with the skill to survive#
#It's the eye of the tiger, it's the dream of the fight#
#Risin' up to the challenge of our rival#
#And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night#
#And he's watchin' us all with the eye of the tiger#
#Risin' up, straight to the top#
#Had the guts, got the glory#
#Went the distance, now I'm not gonna stop#
#Just a man and his will to survive#
#It's the eye of the tiger, it's the dream of the fight#
#Risin' up to the challenge of our rival#
#And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night#
#And he's watchin' us all with the eye of the tiger#
#The eye of the tiger#
#The eye of the tig----------

Beelzebozo is PUMPED right the FUCK UP! Isn’t it great to be alive? He’s also arrived at the carnival. Look at those big neon letters.

Just look at them.

“Buster Friendly’s Circus”

He didn’t.

Beelzebozo’s eyes narrow in horror at the sign.

Oh YES he did!

Reaching into his secret pocket, Friendly pulls out a flask. This seems as good a night to die the thousand liver deaths as any.

The remains of NextWave have already wandered in.

Brandon Young: Thanks for the thought, Soundy, but this place seems pretty dead.

“Like what I’ve done with the place?”

The ringmaster steps out from behind a prize counter. Top hat, bright red coat with golden sequins and cartoonishly long coat tails. White gloves hiding brass knuckles. White shirt. Black snakeskin vest. Red bowtie. The devil of SWAT is dressed to impress.

Vile Vince Viper: Apparently Balan was building thisss eyesore for you when he had his little malfunction. Seems like the rest of Luchian Inc. weren’t as enamoured with justifying your existence as that russsty {Mongo Edit: Nah we don't say that anymore}, <pearly yellow> so I got the place for an INCREDIBLE STEAL. I bet you could have set up your whole Menagerie with substantial 401s... <shaking head> I guess this place was your DREAM...

The rest of the attractions all fire up. Ferris wheels spin, rollercoasters jet, and merry go rounds turn... happy music plays, its all quite sinister.

Vile Vince Viper <eyes narrow>: Welcome to your nightmare.

CARNIVAL DEATH MATCH

Letting out an inhuman shriek of rage, “Beelzebozo” Buster Friendly charges through the entrance and down the midway towards his archenemy as fast as possible given the big ass shoes.

Brandon Young: Um. Vile. This is kind of a painful day for us… and um, well, you kind of terrify us, so we’re just going to go.

Vile Vince Viper: Perish the thought Brandon. We need witnesses.

Brandon Young: What about the camer----

Before Young can finish his thought, Viper has thrown a fireball at the charging Beelzebozo, missing the clown by a wide range. No easy feat. Just as Buster Friendly dives at Viper, the fireball catches the camera right in the lens.

SIGNAL LOST

Static. The live feed cuts back to the announcer’s position at the arena.

Jeremy Tucker: We apologize for the interruption fans, we seem to be having some technical difficulties at the other site.

Andrew Fulton: He torched that camera on purpose!

Jeremy Tucker: Of course he did. Viper has been very vocal about this match not being the main event, likening it to Hogan vs Savage curtain jerking for the Brooklyn Brawler taking on Greg Gagne, Miz, Sable and Eva Marie.

Andrew Fulton: I don’t know who any of those people are.

Jeremy Tucker: Me neither, though we can all guess who they represent, and the situation sure has Viper steamed. So he’s obviously beating up cameraman hoping that we’ll run through the rest of the card while waiting for him to come back to air.

Andrew Fulton: That all sounds like something he’d do. Also like something we'd do...

Jeremy Tucker: But the jokes on him. Pesci is so committed to the contest of champions, that he ponied up for TWO camera operators. Take it away, Dave!

CARNIVAL FEED

A SECOND CAMERA shows the smoking remains of the first camera, and the unconscious videographer next to it. SWAT has thought of everything. So Viper hits it with a European upper cut!

SIGNAL LOST

Jeremy Tucker: MOTHER FUCKER!

Andrew Fulton: Language Jeremy!

Jeremy Tucker: Well, I guess its time for the Contest of champions... we should probably send all available camera operators to wander the Sonoran desert... the Arizona part... in search of this match. It was suppose to be the match of the year...

Andrew Fulton: It probably is, we just can’t watch it.

CARNIVAL FEED

The signal cuts back in again, to find Brandon Young cowering behind a hot dog stand, trying to stay out of sight. It should be noted that the image is now from a weird worm’s eye view, and Brandon is SUPER PISSED when he sees it pointed at him.

Brandon Young: Put that thing down Soundy... and stop filming me, I don’t want them to know where I am.

Spike Nelson: Hey Brandon!

Brandon Young: AH!

The BETTER half of Better Than Sex stands over the hot dog stand. A terrified Brandon Young looks like he may have pissed himself, only to breath a sigh of relief at Simply Amazing’s friendly mug.

Spike Nelson: Hi Soundy. Hey Brandon, what are you doing here bud?

Brandon Young: Hiding from your grandfather.

Spike Nelson: He’d be really hurt to hear you say that.

Brandon Young: He kayfabe killed me like seven times in Backyard, and LEGALLY twice. Just keep your voice down, I haven’t seen him in awhile.

Vile Vince Viper: Oh he’s up there.

Soundy zooms out slightly to find that Vile Vince Viper has been two feet away from this conversation the entire time. The king of snakes is currently looking at the Ferris Wheel, which a devastatingly drunk Beelzebozo is climbing.

Speaking of liquid courage, it might be his empty bladder, but Brandon Young decides to man up, throwing himself between cameraman Soundy and the king of snakes.

Brandon Young: Please don’t break him Vile... he’s all I’ve got left.

Vile Vince Viper <checking watch>: Don’t worry, by this point the contest of champions will have ended, or everyone will have killed themselves from boredom. So your diminutive robot is safe.

Spike Nelson: So can we get some cotton candy now, Grandpa? <turning to Brandon with a smile> We’re going to eat it until we’re ready to explode! This is going to be the best Spike-Grandfather Fun Day EVER!

Vile Vince Viper: Here he comesss.

With self-loathing abandon, Beelzebozo throws himself off the Ferris wheel, diving at the king of snakes with a suicidal elbow drop!








Soaring fifty feet through the air!







When you’re this shit faced drunk, you have a hard time with things like depth, so he may not have realized how far he was flying.









...Or which of the three Viper’s he should be aiming at.

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

#CRASH#

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Beelzebozo DESTROYS the cotton candy machine ten feet to Viper’s right.

Spike Nelson: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Vile Vince Viper: Making Spike cry? This just got persssonal.

The scarlet serpent starts to lift the unconscious Beelzebozo out of the broken cotton candy machine, only to kneelift him back down into the glass. Grabbing a fistful of greasy hair covered in fluffy pink powdered sugar, VVV rubs the clown’s face into the glass, carving it up, before dragging him out.

Brandon Young: He looks like he’s had enough.

Vile Vince Viper: We’ve ONLY. JUSSST. BEGUN.

Barely lifting him, Viper drags Beelzebozo along the rough pavement by the hair, pulling the large man over to the prize stand that he’d started at. It looks a little beat up from some earlier off screen action, but the glass case is intact.

Vile Vince Viper: So I don’t know if you know this Brandon... but I sort of won a haunted house match last year that entitled me to all of Tanner’s shit. I lossst most of it to a fire, but I did come across a number of valuable minerals... including this little number.

Ramming Beelzebozo’s head into the glass case, again and again, soon turns the white face paint pink... and shatters the glass, to reveal...








The Syndicate Wrestling And Tradition WORLD Heavyweight Title

VVV continues to ram Beelzebozo’s face into sharp corners of the box while cutting a promo. With every word Viper utters, he smashes Friendly’s face for emphasis.

Vile Vince Viper: Turn in your tickets to WIN fabulous prizes! Golden ticketsss? HA! You win one of those at the Halloween Cup, Beelzley? We don’t accept counterfeit crap for our valuable bobblesss! At Buster Friendly’s Carnival - you need to play games to win tickets. We don’t just hand them all away! You have been the ONE THING standing between me and TOTAL DOMINATION... so while the rest of the SSSWAT clowns fight for golden tickets... tonight... you and me... this is for the WORLD TITLE!!!!!!!!!

Leaving Beelzebozo’s mangled corpse in the glass, Vile runs his blood covered white gloves through his air, trying to compose himself.

Vile Vince Viper: So want to play a game? Ssshall I guess your weight?

Beelzebozo: Nah... let me guess... yours...

Vile seems amused that the bloody husk is regaining consciousness, and game.

Beelzebozo: A few pounds less by the minute.

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Pulling a butterfly knife out of his sleeve, Beelzebozo runs it across Viper’s midsection, cutting the bottom half of his vest off, and leaving a ten inch scar across the albino’s now exposed gut.

MONSTER POP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The audience pops hard! But when they realize they’re just Brandon and Soundy, they get very quiet and very scared.

Viper starts to retaliate, only to clutch his stomach, trying to keep the torn skin from ripping back further. Blood starts to pour onto the midway.

Beelzebozo: How about a high striker.

TripleV turns just as Beelzebozo NAILS him square in the nuts with a GIANT HAMMER. The force causes the old man to double over, and throw up water. Never a good sign. As Old Scratch assumes the position, Beelzebozo nails him in the back with the hammer! The force causes Vile to collapse onto a strength tester.

Strength Tester: 3!

The puck goes up to 3, but they can do better than that. This isn’t Amazons. Spike Nelson tries to help his grandfather off the bottom of the level, only to jump back at the next hammer swing. Coming down hard on Viper’s back around the area where the tester connects, the puck is sent straight up to the top.

DING!

Strength Tester: 10!

Beelzebozo: Lets get this match started...

DING! DING! DING!

That was cruel.

While Beelzebozo struggles to pull a bottle of vodka out of his trenchcoat, Spike Nelson tries to help his grandfather up. VVV looks like he’s broken a few ribs.

Spike Nelson: I know you don’t need help grandpa but...

Vile looks ready to strangle Spike, happily taking any edge he can get. Another hammer shot, sees Spike duck, and Viper knocked into a whack a mole game.

The impact starts up the game, with plastic moles shooting out of holes, catching Viper in the eye a few times as he desperately tries to pass out on top of it.

A mole pops up two inches from Viper’s nose. Its smiling.

#SMASH#

A massive hammer shot narrowly misses Viper, taking out the mole, and a large piece of the table.

Wide eyed with fear, Viper wakes up fast.

Vile Vince Viper: Two can play at that game.

Forcing himself upright, Viper grabs the giant mallet from the whack a mole game!

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Brandon Young: Duelling Rubber Hammers!

A vicious Beelzebozo giant hammer shot cuts the novelty mallet in two. Desperate, Vile pulls out the next thing he can find to sword fight with.

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Brandon Young: DUELLING GIANT HAMMER VERSUS PLASTIC MOLE NOVELTY ITEM!

What? Vile sees he’s pulled out one of the animatronic moles just as has it batted out of his hand, and probably has his hand broken. Another hammer shot sends a now bloody Viper stumbling back into the hotdog stand.






! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Brandon Young: DUELLING GIANT HAMMER VERSUS WEINERS!

His fingers might be bent in all the wrong directions, but your king of snakes has enough function in his mangled digits to hold a fistful of hotdogs he thought was a weapon.

#SMACK#

Yeah, that hand is busted.

Looking for something else to throw, Viper settles on a tub of boiling hot HOT DOG water.

Beelzebozo lets out another inhuman scream, as he tries to block the water with his trenchcoat. Still manages to catch him in the arm, and splash his face a little. Dropping the giant hammer in agony, Beelzebozo rips the steaming coat off his back. The blisters have already started forming on his neck, as he turns around for the...

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Spike Nelson: SATAN’S STRUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Brandon Young: BUT VIPER’S FINGERS ARE SO BENT OUT OF SHAPE THEY DON’T CATCH THE EYES!

Grabbing Viper’s messed up hand, Beelzebozo pulls it down towards his own neck, rubbing it in the boiling water that’s peeling off his skin. The blood has a cooling effect on the clown’s third degree burns, while its still hot enough to scald the old man.

Brandon Young: Friendly trying to pull Vile’s arm out of the socket and eventually hiptosses him over into the... oh no!

Spike Nelson: Frog Bog is the best game of all time!!!

Brandon Young: Said nobody ever.

Crushing the king of snakes neck with his size 32 clown shoe, Beelzebozo keeps the old man’s head under the water.

As the bubbles start to lessen, Buster takes another drink from his trusty flask, then poors some out for his dead robotic homie... only to catch it in his hand and drink that too, because he has a serious drinking problem.

Brandon Young: A clown shoe thrust kick sends Viper further back into the pond, and Buster Friendly is loading up that lever.

Spike Nelson: WATCH OUT GRANDPA!!!

Brandon Young: Buster firing plastic frogs at lily ponds, mostly catching Viper in the face. No, that frog caught his hand... kind of a dick move. Vile looks like a drowned rat, broken hand, broken ribs, and just getting buried under those toy frogs!

Spike Nelson: Buster has Jedi accuracy skills! He’s like some sort of drunken master when it comes to Frog Bog.

Brandon Young: I’m surprised you’re not helping Vile double team Friendly.

Spike Nelson: Grandpa wanted to keep this one on one. He was telling me that sometimes a man has to stand on his own two-

Vile Vince Viper: SPIKE HELP ME!

Spike Nelson: ...I’ve got to go.

Viper looks ready to cry as Beelzebozo sends another frog straight into his mouth. Before Friendly can let the stream of frogs assault the already bruised or broken ribs of the ancient one, Spike Nelson catches him in the back with a turntable.

Spike Nelson: Time to have a rap battle... oh.

Sadly the turntable falls into frog bog.

Spinning around, Beelzebozo barely acknowledges the turntable shot, as he sucker punches Simply Amazing, then knocks him away with a Clown Shoe Yakuza kick.

Brandon Young: This might be the best frog bog death match I’ve ever seen. Certainly in the top five! Viper trying to get out of the stupid game, but Beelzebozo keeps knocking him back in. Friendly also keeping Spike Nelson at bay with some vicious right hooks. He’s holding his own against both members of Better Than Sex, but why not, with his double vision, that drunk has been fighting two people all night!

Soundy: Beep.

Viper blinds Beelzebozo with a fistful of circus peanuts, the grittiest substance known to man. This opens a window for Spike to hit a shining wizard. Better Than Sex take turns kicking the clown with their human sized boots.

Brandon Young: Cheap shot puts Buster back on the defensive. Spike Nelson not showing his usual heart as he joins his grandfather in stomping a hole in Friendly.

Soundy: Beep.

Brandon Young: True. Vile trying to get Nelson enthusiastic about this gang beating, bulldogs Beelzebozo into the one thing that no self respecting Jersey Boy can ignore.

Spike Nelson: SCOOCHAMUNGAGOUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Soundy: Beep.

Brandon Young: Viper tying the clown’s shoe laces to the lane edges so that Beelzebozo is spread eagle on a-

Spike Nelson: SKEE BALL! God’s sport!

Brandon Young: Spike Nelson’s Jersey is showing. Simply Amazing throwing a skee ball down the lane...

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Vile Vince Viper: Great throw Spike!

Spike Nelson: Thanks Grandpa!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: RIGHT IN THE DICK! SON OF...
Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson throws a skee ball.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson starts to waver.

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Is this the right thing to do?

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Beelzebozo starts trying to undo his shoelaces to free himself, as Spike has a personal crisis...

Beelzebozo: ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Spike Nelson: Grandpa, I’m not sure I should be helping like this.

Beelzebozo: YOU JUST FIGURED THAT OUT!? MY TESTICLES ARE SWELLING TO THE SIZE OF FUCKING SKEE BA------ARGH! MY CROTCH!

Vile Vince Viper: But Spike <holding up a bunch of tickets> look at how many ticketsss you’ve picked up! You could be the world champion before me! A winner is you!

Girls like winners! Spike throws another skee ball, which hits Buster Friendly square in his elephant sized – formerly mouse sized – junk... but Simply Amazing’s heart isn’t in it.

Spike Nelson: I’m starting to get a tummy ache.

Is Spike growing a conscience? He’s watched the Grinch that Stole Christmas so many times, this could be the only way to develop one.

Vile Vince Viper: It sounds more like an ulcer, no doubt worried... NOT because you were doing anything bad, but just thinking about what that ssscary drunk was doing to your poor grandfather.

Spike Nelson: Oh.

Vile Vince Viper: Now throw another skee ball. Lets stop this parasite from unleashing more bastards on the world.

Bastards. Another touchy subject in the Nelson house. Before Viper can wax over his social faux pas with some more hilarious genital mutilation, a shoeless Beelzebozo takes Better Than Sex out with a double closeline.

Brandon Young: Beelzebozo freeing himself from that skee ball lane, taking out Better Than Sex! Spike Nelson rolling away, lost in a moral dilemma – which leaves Viper to take the clown’s bow legged wraith!

Soundy: Beep.

Brandon Young: You said it!

Beelzebozo: You want a prize! Try this!

Reaching up at one of the gambling booths, Beelzebozo rips off a cheaply made Korean stuffed purple dolphin. He slams it over VVV’s head. Vile doesn’t sell for stuffed animals, so Beelzebozo makes sure to stand on his broken fingers while using the toy.

Spike Nelson: I’m coming Grandpa...

Simply Amazing tries to interject himself again, only to eat a stuffed animal shot, which he sells like death!

Vile Vince Viper: NO SSSELL IT, SPIKE!

Spike Nelson: I’m trying Grandpa!

It might be the ulcer bleeding out, but Spike curls up in a fetal position and starts shaking violently.

Beelzebozo: Don’t you ever shut up.

Pulling the dolphin’s head off, Beelzebozo pulls out a fistful of stuffing, and shoves it down Viper’s gullet. Then another fistful! Viper starts to roll around, choking violently.

Brandon Young: Buster Friendly trying to suffocate Viper with that cheap toy stuffing! Vile is turning red, and he’s an albino by the way!

Grabbing a bowling pin from one of the games of chance, Beelzebozo decides to beat Viper out of their misery. The old man rolls with each shot, trying to pull the garbage out of his mouth, or create an air hole. Finally one of the bowling pin shots, sends him crashing into the merry-go-round.

MERRY-GO-ROUND DEATH MATCH

Brandon Young: Beelzebozo beating Viper onto that merry-go-round, and decides to follow up... nope... Friendly’s equilibrium in his current state wants NO PART of that moving platform.

Soundy: Beep.

Brandon Young: He’s ready to finish Vile off, but wants to wait for the corpse to circle back around.

Holding his balls in pain with one hand, while raising the bowling pin like a baseball bat with the other, Buster Friendly waits for the merry go round to bring Viper back for the death kill.

The old man can barely defend himself, but he does have a lighter. If he can’t dig the blockage out, he’s going to have to burn it out...

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Vile Vince Viper: YOGA FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Igniting the stuffing, Viper blows a huge fire ball at Beelzebozo!

Brandon Young: Buster Friendly ON FIRE!!! And Viper catching his breath, looking to the games of chance for more props!!! Here it is - an air gun!

No sooner has Buster Friendly rolled the fire out, then VVV is shooting him with an air gun. That tickles.

PFFT!
PFFT!
PFFT!

Rather than going for real damage, Viper starts to herd Beelzebozo towards another ride. Everytime that Beelzebozo tries to no sell the gunshots, he takes another to the groin... which is hard to protect at its current size.

Brandon Young: Viper sending Beelzebozo over towards the rollercoaster. Spike Nelson is sitting on it, currently staring off into space.

Vile Vince Viper: What’s a carnival without rides? You too!

Brandon Young: I’m not comfortable with roller coasters... those things are death traps.

Vile Vince Viper <infamous scowl>: I wasn’t asking.

Firing at their feet, Viper herds Brandon and Soundy onto the rollercoaster as well.

Out of ammo.

Vile Vince Viper: Oh.

Vile tries to swing the gun like a club, only for Beelzebozo to spear into him another cart. Brandon starts to get up to leave, but the neck rests come down, firmly strapping him and Spike into the ride. Soundy is too short, and the active participants brawling like lunatics.

ROLLERCOASTER DEATH MATCH

Brandon Young <covering eyes>: I CAN’T WATCH!!!

The rollercoaster slowly starts to rise up above the carnival grounds. From the third compartment, Beelzebozo and Viper trade shots - but the state of Viper’s left hand definitely gives Buster the edge. Its all VVV can do to work a few low blows in to keep it from being completely one sided.

Brandon Young: TELL ME WHEN ITS OVER!!!

Soundy: Beep.

Beelzebozo tries to hiptoss Viper off the ride, but the old man puts the breaks on, and thumbs him in the throat.

A shoulderblock almost knocks Beelzebozo backwards. They’re a good sixty feet up in the air. Friendly teases falling out, only to grab Viper by the throat.

The old man pulls them both back in.

This thing sure is high.

Brandon Young: I’m going to be sick!

While being choked, Vile tries to force his broken hand into a devil hand gesture for the satan’s strut.

Then they reach the top.

Before Vile can hit his patented eye gouge, the rollercoaster starts to barrel down at 120 miles per hour. Not strapped in, both men go tumbling up from the third cart to the sixth one.

Beelzebozo tries to kick Viper off, only to have his leg bitten.

Both men are trying to hang on for dear life while throwing whatever punches and kicks they can at each other.

There’s a loop.

They somehow hang on.

Then there’s a second loop.

The two men, and robot holding a camera, go airborne.

Ever the showman, Beelzebozo tries to make it look like he’s hitting Viper with a Superman punch. Its hard to tell if the punch hits, before both men go plummeting into the fun house roof.

Spike Nelson: GRANDPA!!!

Brandon Young: WHAT AM I MISSING?!

The roof breaks.

SIGNAL LOST

...

CARNIVAL FEED

When Soundy gets back up, the three men have fallen through the roof into a house of mirrors.

Beelzebozo slowly rises to his feet, only to be confronted by a few dozen images of his burnt, scared face.

Vile Vince Viper fortunately managed to break his fall... With a mirror that’s currently sticking out of his shoulder.

Both men inspect their surroundings, mostly ugly images of themselves starring back at them.

Something doesn’t feel right about this set-up.

Vile Vince Viper: I didn’t even know this place had a house of mirrorsss. You’d think they’d have to declare that with a bill of sale...

#SMASH#

Beelzebozo punches a mirror with Vipers reflection on it. His hand is cut to ribbons by the broken glass.

Spike Nelson: Grandpa, are you alright?!

Having found a way off the roller coaster, Spike Nelson and Brandon Young stare down from the hole in the ceiling.

Brandon Young: You there, Soundy?

Soundy: Beep.

Spike Nelson: Hang on, I’ll find a way down.

Vile Vince Viper: Don’t Spike, thisss place...

“Welcome.”

The few hundred mirrors light up with a hologram of Attila Balan.

Beelzebozo: heh.

AB : Buster. If your optical recepticals are reviewing this information, than this unit is no longer functioning to analyze your further developments into the best Buster Friendly you can become. It also means that you have achieved this state of effeiency without Luchian Inc.’s further assistance. Congratulations. This unit’s probability simulator had 0% doubt that it would occur.

Vile Vince Viper: DON’T COME DOWN HERE SPIKE!!!

#THUD#

Spike Nelson: I’ll save you grandpa.

Jumping down, Spike now finds himself faced with hundreds of mirrors, some featuring him, others Vile, others Beelzebozo, mostly Balan.

Spike Nelson: This is just like on Dagobah.

AB : This unit’s cerebral cortex recognized that you could only reach that final evolution by yourself, Buster. If this unit’s central processing unit allowed for feelings, it would miss you a great deal. All known data suggests that humanoids like yourself require closure. It was also this unit’s larger design that you would have a final challenge where you could understand how much you have changed and grown since our experiment first started. It is Luchian Inc.’s hope that the following test will provide both for you.

Vile Vince Viper: SPIKE LOOK FOR AN EXIT!

AB : Standing before you is a reflection of Beelzebozo. Or is it Buster Friendly? To better yourself, you must embrace yourself. Recognize the flaws, but do not be defined by them. There are new paths available to you. This circus is not a gift, recognize your own worth, and that you have earned it. The path is up to you.

A red light starts to flash.

AB : A three-minute timer has been set. If you fail to reach the exit of this house of mirrors before that countdown ends, you will be trapped in here. At that point, a Hell’s Bouncer promo will be played on loop, reflected in these five hundred mirrors. A soul stripping experience this unit would not wish on its worst enemy, let alone its best friend. The door will be open in six hours, but our research and development team finds it will feel like a hundred years, and render any victims quivering organ sacks void of any psyche.

Viper and Spike start desperately running around corners, feeling out reflective glass as they look for an exit. A calmer Beelzebozo stares at the image of his friend.

AB : Should your memory banks hold any thoughts of this unit, it is Luchian’s hope that you will step on flowers, they are revolting. You can do this Buster. You always could. Goodbye my friend.

The hologram cuts out.

A desperate VVV starts to spit black venom at mirrors, attempting to mark off the reflections to clear a path. The reflections of black just make it harder.

Vile Vince Viper: That stupid fucking robot.

Seeing a reflection of Viper running towards him, Beelzebozo puts his hand through one of the mirrors. #CRASH#

Viper’s reflection looks startled, only for another mirror to bite the dust. #CRASH#

Beelzebozo then turns to his own reflection, and punches through it too.

Wrapping his good arm in his ringmaster coat for protection, Viper starts to charge through sheets of glasses. His broken hand dripping blood behind him. The coat protects a little, but is cut to ribbons in seconds. The flying glass nicks his face.

Spike Nelson has somehow managed to get stuck to one of the mirrors covered in black venom.

Having given up his shoes at the skee ball lanes, Beelzebozo stomps bowlegged through broken glass, looking more like John McClane by the second.

Brandon Young: To the left Soundy, nah, your other left!

Brandon’s less than helpful advice is soon drowned out as the two men smash mirror after mirror. Some looking like their nemesis, others looking like themselves. It’s hard to say which they hit harder.

Beelzebozo goes to knock out another Viper reflection, only to catch the real on on the chin.

Spitting up blood, Viper stomps on Beelzebozo’s foot, grinding the glass in.

Fighting through the pain, Beelzebozo lifts Viper up in the air, spearing him through four rows of mirrors. Without the coat on, the glass makes quick work of VVV’s back.

Putting the breaks on, Viper manages to lock on a headlock, and twist Beelzebozo through two other mirrors.

Grabbing large shards of glass from the floor, Buster and Viper start to have knife fights, pushing one another through mirrors when not actively stabbing at each other.

The floors are dripping with gore, with neither man showing any sense of stopping.

Soundy attempts to pull Spike Nelson off of his tar soaked mirror, only to break it, revealing an exit.

One minute.

As the knife fight starts to escalate further, Soundy abandons the action, taking the mirror outside.

Spike Nelson: Over here!

45 seconds.

Taking a shard of glass to the throat, VVV pulls Friendly into a bearhug and starts headbutting glass down into Friendly’s face. He’s starting to resemble jigsaw.

Jumping forwards Beelzebozo throws himself and Viper through another mirror. Both men roll around in pain.

20 seconds.

Noticing the exit, all three men make a break for it. Beelzebozo has bloody stubs for feet, elephant testicles, and was too drunk to walk to begin with. Spike Nelson can only shift side to side because most of his body has been glued to mirror by his grandfather’s horrible black venom... and Viper is old. Its quite a race.

10 seconds.

Viper rushes path both men to the exit.

8 seconds.

Beelzebozo can barely stand on his feet.

5 seconds.

Beelzebozo grabs Spike Nelson...


4
3
2

...and throws him out before the gate closes.

As the door swings shut, the hole in the ceiling allows you to hear a promo cueing up, and the silent acceptance of a slow and agonizing death.

Unsure of what just happen, Spike manages to break the mirror he’s attached to, as he falls down on his knees. Grabbing the door, Spike desperate tries to pull it up. Use all of his strength. Only to drop to his knees, waiting for the horrible end of his rapping rival.

The former NextWave member climbs down the side of the Fun House to join the camera operator.

Brandon Young: You thought this was going to get my mind off of it?!

Soundy: Beep.

Brandon Young: ...robots.

Having immediately cleared out, Vile Vince Viper smiles to the heavens that he has once again cheated death, and vanquished the only man who could beat him. Cackling like an insensitive field, Viper grabs Soundy by the neck and drags the camera operator over to the prize table.

Vile Vince Viper: There you have it...

Reaching into the table, Viper pulls out his SWAT World title, holding it up for the camera.

Vile Vince Viper: WAS THERE EVER ANY DOUBT? Ha! Follow THAT, motherfuckers!

The Devil of SWAT spits blood at the camera. Through the crimson red you can still see his silhouette posing with Adrian Tanner’s world title.

[SWAT Team]

[Backstage, Pesci is WALKING...]

“Excuse me, Mr. Pesci.”

[The SWAT owner who might also be a popular actor turns towards a middle aged man in a cheap suit, standing next to the SWAT Backyard ULTIMATE Champion, Sirius Man.]

Man <handing card>: I’m Barry Rosenberg, The Wrestling Lawyer.

Joe Pesci: If you’re wondering why that stronzo isn’t in the contest of champions, we don’t appreciate Backyard working the same cities as SWAT Europe, and until the matter is settled, its an outlaw region in my eyes!

[Sirius Man raises a plate of ravioli.]

Sirius Man: I just came for the kraft service table...

[The Dog Faced Luchador starts to stuff linguini into his pockets. They really don’t feed the Backyard gang.]

Barry Rosenberg <handing Sirius Man his card>: It sounds like the Ultimate Champion has a strong case for discrimination, call my office, I’m sure we can put a headlock on this despicable injustice. <back to Joe> No Mr. Pesci, I’m actually here representing a different client.

LEFT Tentacle: Hey Joe!

[OH NO! Terrified, Joe Pesci tries to run away from the giant felt tentacle, only to have his path blocked by the Ultimate Champion.]

Joe Pesci: NO, wait---

Barry Rosenberg: I can see from your reaction that you are aware of the case. That will save some time, but I’m still going to have to bill for it. At last year’s New Years Nightmare, you put a bounty on members of the Backyard roster – offering compensation for assaulting them with chairs.

Joe Pesci: It was a figure of speech!

Barry Rosenberg: Due to the complicated ownership structure of the SWAT regions, confusing nature of the board of directors, and mazelike levels of management, it has been difficult for my client to collect his reward.

Joe Pesci <turning to LEFT Tentacle>: I told you I was good for it kid!

LEFT Tentacle: I know Joe! This isn’t me! I could happily wait forever...

Joe Pesci: Works for me.

LEFT Tentacle: BUT This is the lawyer’s idea... I'm so sorry Joe!

Joe Pesci <sharking his head in disgust, while LEFT Tentacle looks like he just stabbed his closest friend in the back>: Et tu, Tentacle?

Barry Rosenberg: In taking complete ownership of SWAT, streamlining the board of directors, and reorganizing the territories under your control, you have made the situation much easier to traverse.

Joe Pesci: Figlio de Puttanna!

Barry Rosenberg: That’s what they all say. Along with the original 8 million, we’re seeking an additional 2 million in damages for irreparably harming my client’s career by sending him to XWCW, as well as covering his court fees.

Sirius Man <jaw drops>: TEN MILLION!?! I thought it was like five hundred dollars a headshot, how many guys you hit with chairs?!

LEFT Tentacle <dying>: I can’t see in this outfit. I’m really sorry everyone.

Joe Pesci <shaking with rage>: Fine, you want to sue me, LEFT? I guess we all see your true colours now, you commie tentacle son of a bitch! Well I can lawyer up too, have this joke tied up in court till we’re all dead!

Barry Rosenberg: Court? Mr. Pesci... I’m Barry Rosenberg. The Wrestling Lawyer. My court is the squared circle.

[Barry tears off his pants to reveal a pair of black trunks, and wrestling boots! He’s ready to practice law!]

Barry Rosenberg: We’re settling this in the ring!

Joe Pesci <running for his life>: I NEED BETTER REPRESENTATION!!!

LEFT Tentacle: I’ll help you, Joe!

[Coming over from the craft service table is Backyard wrestling’s favourite referee Curly Appleton, and voluptuous timekeeper Siphilonia carrying her trusty bell.]

DING! DING! DING!!!

Joe Pesci: Get out of my way, you Mamaluke!

[Pesci kicks LEFT Tentacle in the crotch, desperately trying to escape the Wrestling Lawyer. This is a shame, as Tentacle is the only one trying to help the horrible owner of SWAT. Without his client in the way, Barry V-lines towards Joe, taking him over with a waistlock, before transitioning to a headlock.]

Barry Rosenberg: Just sign on the dotted line!

Joe Pesci: Never!

[Letting go of the headlock, Barry locks on a hammerlock armbar, forcing a pen into Pesci’s free hand, and muscling him towards a contract acknowledging the 10 million debt. For his part, Pesci tries to use the pen to stab at Rosenberg, but the shrewd grappler didn’t spend 8 years in wrestling law school for nothing, and easily dodges.]

Barry Rosenberg: SETTLE!

Joe Pesci: Mangia merde e morte!

[Apparently officiating this contest, Curly moves in to see if Pesci will sign the paperwork...]

! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

[Only to be SAVED by LEFT Tentacle, who pulls his own representation off with a full nelson.]

LEFT Tentacle: RUN JOE!

Joe Pesci: Thanks kid!

[Before Tentacle can harm his future any further, The Masked Annihilator jumps out from behind a door, and takes Pesci’s head off with a closeline. The mysterious stranger then pulls Tentacle away from his lawyer, freeing Rosenberg.]

Joe Pesci: awww... ma... jaw...

[Escaping his client, Barry Rosenberg dives on top of Pesci for a cover...]









ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!










TWO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DING! DING!! DING!!!

Siphilonia: The winner of this match, The Wrestling Lawyer!

Joe Pesci: WHAT NO!!! NO!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!

LEFT Tentacle: I’m so sorry!

Joe Pesci: THIS WON’T HOLD UP!!!!!!!!!

Barry Rosenberg <putting his pants back on>: You just don’t understand the wrestling business, Mr. Pesci.

Joe Pesci: It’s not fair...

[As The Masked Annihilator disappears into the background, the Backyard workers lift their new multimillionaire colleague up in the air. Far from happy, LEFT Tentacle looks genuinely devastated for his close friend, Joe Pesci, who is sobbing on the floor.]

[SWAT Team]

Tucker: Welcome back everyone and it appears Pecsi has ordered every competitor to the ring immediately following his changing the stipulations of this match.

Fulton: I can't even tell you who, right now, looks the best going into a ladder match. .

Frankc Salazar : The following contest is the main event of the evening Challenge of the CHAMPIONS!!!

Introducing the SWAT International Champion ... DANIEL COLLINS!!!!

The SWAT AMAZONS Champion ... JADE!!!!

The SWAT Hardcore Champion .... HELLS BOUNCER!!!!

The SWAT Pan Am Champion .... ERICA LINDSAY RICH!!!!

One half of Bro Code and the SWAT World Tag Team Champions .... THE RULER PAUL BLAIR!!!!



DING DING

Tucker: And with that the battle for the Golden Ticket to the Helloween and a shot at the World championship has begun.

All six participants scramble out of the ring all going for a ladder. Bouncer and Collins grabbing the same large ladder and staring down each other as they start a tug of war. Jade and Blair getting a ladder of their own with ELR moving more sluggishly. Showing signs of fatigue from their earlier match. Still she's able to jump Blair from behind while he's folding up his ladder. Shoving him towards the barrier. The ladder ramming into it and him bouncing off of it. Jade looks around and quickly shoves the ladder into the ring and starts setting it up, Seeing the others are distracted.



Fulton: One of the smartest moves in an odd numbered match like this. The others are all in a one on one battle. Capitalize where you can and stay under their radar.

Tucker: Jade climbing towards the prize already. The match couldn't end this early could it.

Collins points into the ring getting Bouncer's attention. Together they throw the ladder over the top rope and it strikes Jade squarely in the back. She crumples on the rungs she's clinging too. Screaming and holding her back where the ladder hit her.

Tucker: Those two lucky enough to catch Jade trying to steal the prize.

Fulton: Damn shame she failed.

Tucker: It would have been a very unsatisfying main event.

Fulton: A World title match is hanging up there. I couldn't blame someone putting opportunity before entertainment.

Collins tries to climb into the right, but Bouncer grabs his by the ankle and yanks him off making him slam his head on the apron in the fall. Kim, Jade's twin, climbs into the ring trying to help her sister back up. ELR is pulling the ladder off of Blair and sliding it into the ring. Climbing inside with it and chasing Kim out of the ring. Jade grabs ELR from behind and hits a neckbreaker on the canvas. Blair slowly getting up outside and looking around.

Fulton: Well I guess you're getting what you want Jerry. It's now a cluster of action.

Tucker: It certainly is and I don't hear the crowd complaining.

Jade gets back up and turns to Blair, ducking a swing and coming back with several strikes. She whips him across the ropes and comes running after him. Blair ducking and pulling down the rope as he does. Sending her tumbling outside. Blair gets back up and is met with a clothesline from Bouncer, sending him out besides Jade. Collins, meanwhile rolls into the ring and starts to pull ELR back to her feet. She fights him off and pushes him back into the standing ladder. She tries to hit a running forarm but he sidesteps causing her to slam her own arm into the ladder. She holds onto it looking pained. Collins climbs a few steps on the ladder, she reaches up to grab at him with her injured arm, but he jumps over it and lands a kick down on the same arm. Her falling and holding tightly to onto her arm.

Tucker: Rich taking more damage early when dhe already had to fight tonight.

Fulton: The underdog in this match for sure. She has my vote.

Tucker: I thought you were behind Jade?

Fulton: I'm behind the winner Jerry.

Bouncer pushes the ladder over making it fall towards the ropes. Collins uses his foot to catch himself on the rope and pushes off. Leaping from the ladder and hitting a crossbody on Bouncer. Blair has recovered and is grabbing another ladder and swinging it at Jade. Jade takes a hit across the back again and crumples against the barricade. Kim comes rushing over and checks on Jade as Blair moves back into the ring. He catches Collins in the chin with a kick and backs him up into the corner. He starts to deliver knife edge chops that garner WOOOS from the audience.

Fulton: Get that out of here. We're better than that.

Tucker: A lot of our superstars certainly think so.

Jade is back up with Kim's help. Kim climbs onto the ropes and starts to yell at those in the ring. Bouncer is getting up and sees her. Making his way over to chase Kim off again. Jade climbs up to her side quickly and hits a leaning kick to Bouncer's face. She drops back down and Kim helps her in locating a ladder. Bouncer comes back to the ropes and he's met by the top end from both women, slamming him in the face making him fall back in the ring. The two women then bridge the ladder over the barricade and ring.

Blair is turning away from Collins, but is blindsided by a ladder that ELR is wielding. She isn't able to hold onto it though, and drops it. Blair is getting off the ropes, still dazed and tries to swing at ELR. She manages to dodge and hit a few strikes into Blair's face and then sweeping his leg out from under him. She opens the bottom end of the ladder and rolls him between the sides. She goes to slam it down across him but he stops it. The two struggle, her pushing down and him pressing up. He eventually manages to make her lose her grip. The end of the ladder hitting her and causing her to fall back. Collins has climbed in the corner and dives off landing down on top of the ladder and managing to crush Blair inside. Collins rolling off, clutching his back.

Tucker: Putting his body on the line for an opportunity.

Fulton: It's a huge waste if it doesn't pay off.

Bouncer has wandered over to the standing ladder and is leaning on it. Looking around and seeing all but Jade currently down, and Jade not in the ring. He turns and starts to climb the ladder. He's a bit slow getting up. Collins slowly starts to clutch at the bottom of the ladder, trying to chase after Bouncer. Jade is quickly into the ring and then stomps onto Collins shoulders before beginning to climb up behind Bouncer. She wraps herself around his waist and yanks him back. Trying to hit a german suplex off the ladder. Collins rolls to the side and Blair has slid out of the ring. Bouncer holds on, not struggling too hard against Jade. ELR is back up as well, climbing the other side of the ladder. She seems to attempt to ignore Bouncer and reach for the prize. Bouncer elbows Jade off of him, dazing her enough to have her step down off the ladder. He comes back up and grabs ELR and slams her face first into the top of the ladder. He powers her over and suplexes her off the top of the ladder to the canvas, both hitting hard in the ring.

Fulton: Just shove her off.

Tucker: Jade seems to be trying to race to the golden ticket again.

Fulton: You can't beat how intelligent she is.

This time it's Blair to make a save, grabbing her from the ladder and hitting a backstabber. He manages to get up and pushes the ladder over and out of the ring. Seeming out of breath at the moment.

Fulton: Wait... you're supposed to get the ticket.

Tucker: Blair may not think he can make it right now. Removing the ladder may be a way to slow down the match and give him a chance to recuperate enough to go after it later. He's seen everyone that has gone up fall hard. He doesn't want to be next.

Fulton: Okay I'll give him that's actually clever. IF thats what he is thinking Jerry. More likely he doesnt know where the fuck he is at.

Bouncer comes up behind Blair, who responds by elbowing him back. He runs over kneeing ELR in the side and causing her to roll out of the ring. He comes back attacking Bouncer. Striking down across the back over and over again. Bouncer pushes him off, seeming desperate. Blair coming back fast, but gets caught with Bouncer hitting a stiff spinebuster. Outside of the ring Kim is pulling ELR under the bridged ladder. Jade coming over and grabbing ELR by the legs. She then catapaults her up and slams her chest first into the ladder.

Tucker: Brutality is starting to pick up in this match.

Fulton: Yeah, but it is in matches like these that the most clever tend to shine.

Tucker: Well everyone has had their shining moments in this match. It's still anyones game.

Bouncer pulls Blair over to the ropes and threads him between them to hold him in place. He runs back and returns landing a knee directly into Blair's back. Him unable to do anything but writhe while still tangled in the ropes. Collins has gotten up outside of the ring. Pulling a ladder out and setting it up on the outside and beginning to climb it.

Fulton: I think Collins doesn't know where he is anymore.

Tucker: I'm not so sure. He seems to be eyeing Bouncer.

As Bouncer seems to be backing away for another run at Blair. Collins leaps off the ladder and catches Bouncer across the neck with a flying legdrop. The impact is loud and once again Collins seems to be in pain from his own assault.

Fulton: He's going to end his career doing shit like that.

Tucker: At the moment it doesn't look like he's getting himself any closer to the championship opportunity.

Blair manages to free himself but falls out of the ring and flat on his back across the bridged ladder. Jade has climbed up to the corner near him and leaps from it. Hitting a double stomp down on him, cracking the ladder in half under Blair.

Tucker: HOLY... Jade just stomped Blair through the ladder. The officials are looking at him and it appears like they're calling for medical assistance.

Fulton: That's one way to take someone out of the match.

As Blair is being tended to outside of the ring Kim helps Jade take another ladder and slide it into the ring. Both Collins and Bouncer are stiring as she brings the ladder up and bridges it over the side ropes to cut across the corner as a platform. She finds the other ladder laying on the canvas and lays it up in the other corner of the ring as she turns to Bouncer and kicks him in the ribs. Shoving him to the edge of the ring and then forcing him out under the ropes. She turns her attention to Collins.

Tucker: I wonder what Jade has in mind setting up ladders that seem to have no intention to be used to climb to the golden ticket.

Fulton: I'll tell you what. Same thing she did to Blair. Making there be less competitors to worry about.

Collins takes a swing at her, but Jade is currently in a better position. Easily dodging and striking several blows across his back as she drags him over to the corner with the ladder laying in and slams him face first into it. He's slumped against it while she backs up and then runs to dive across his back. He moves at the last second, her body splashing against the ladder, it making a huge crash in the arena.

Tucker: Another crash and burn moment.

Fulton: Much like your career of late Jerry after this show..

Tucker: I go down you go down with me partner..

Fulton: Not me, pal. I'm the voice of SWAT!

Bouncer was recovering outside along with ELR. She spotted the big man and attacked him. Taking one of the pieces of the ladder that had broken and started to swing it across his back over and over again. Each time he tried to get up he was struck again with it. Until he had stopped moving.

Tucker: What a beating from Rich!

Collins grabbed Jade off of the ladder and throwing her onto the canvas. He then grabs and arm and falls back, holding her in an armbreaker submission. Jade is screaming and struggling to try to break free of him. Smacking her other arm against the mat and seeking out a rope.

Tucker: What goes around comes around. Jade trying to take out other people and now Collins may just do that to her.

Fulton: You can't just break a woman's arm.

ELR climbs back into the ring and sees the two. She runs to the ladder that is laying in the corner and pulls it out. Setting it up and starting to climb up towards the ticket. Collins has to break the hold and race up the other side of the ladder trying to catch up with ELR. She is reaching up for the ticket. Touching it with her fingertips. Collins pushing her back and trying to hold her down. Using his leverage to try to reach up as well.

Tucker: It's a battle for the ticket!

Fulton: Those two could end this right here.

Kim gets into the ring and grabs onto Collin's legs. Pulling him down slowly. Making him have to pull out of the fight for the ticket. Bouncer slides in from the other side and grabs onto ELR, also pulling her away from the ladder. Lifting her up and powerbombing her on the ladder bridged over the ropes.

Fulton: Oh god!

Tucker: That's got to be it for Rich. I can't imagine her getting up after that powerbomb.

Bouncer turns around towards the ladder and is smacked across the face by a piece of the shattered ladder by Jade. He falls down, looking to be completely out cold. Collins still trying to fight Kim off.

Tucker: Jade just knocked out Bouncer.

Fulton: The ticket is up for the taking.

Jade starts to climb with a big grin on her face. Backing off from grabs by Collins and laughing at him as she gets up and reaches for the ticket.

Tucker: She's going to steal this with Kim's help.



Two other women jump out of the crowd and rush into the ring. One running up to Kim and pulling her off of Collins. The other stopping Jade just as she is touching the ticket. Yanking her off the ladder. Collins watching in disbelief.

Tucker: That's Lucky Linda and Avery McCullen. THE IRISH ROSE BOMSHELLS!

Fulton: What are they doing?

Tucker: Stopping Jade and Kim apparently. They have seen enough of Kims inteference in this match and as a whole!

Fulton : Its just support for her family, geez.

Kim is thrown out of the ring as the two women come over to Jade and proceed to flapjack her onto the bridged ladder. Letting her lay there across it as they exit. Collins is just staring in disbelief at the scene, and looking around seeing no other competitor up.

Tucker: The Irish Rose Bombshells have cleared the ring of Jade and her interfering twin Km, HB and ELR and Blair are out of it, Collins sensing the moment.

Collins climbs back up the ladder and reaches out. Pulling the ticket down and holding it against his chest.

DING DING DING

Salazar: Here is your winner... DANIEL COLLINS!!!

Fulton: That wasn't what I was expecting at all. But... you can bet that if I had put money on this. It would have been on Collins.

Tucker: Sure it would have. But none the less. Daniel Collins has won himself a World Championship opportunity.

Fulton: I'm quite excited to see that match, to be honest.

"Eye of the Storm" by WattWhite hits and Collins poses on top of the ladder as streamers and glitter fall fromt he ring, and we fade.