SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Jan 31, 2020 5:12:29 GMT -5
[The arena lights go out as a video starts to play it shows Trent Jones dressed up with a bow tie and his black biker vest. He is holding chocolates and flowers he smiles before speaking to the crowd.]
Trent Jones: Ladies tonight one of you will win two million dollars. I just wanted to let you know that Trent Jones is available to date and is looking to hook up with the winner of tonight’s final match. Baby, I can’t wait to show you why they call me Mr. Bones.
[The lights come on and at the announcers’ table is now Trent Jones and his new manager Layton Cook.]
Trent Jones: Welcome back to…
Layton Cook: Dude its the No Man’s Land show.. How do you not know?
Trent Jones: Because It’s sexiest and it should be the NO Person Land Show. The females tonight in these matches are deserving of being showed the upmost respect. Its 2020 SWAT women power is strong.
Layton Cook: Dude that’s not what you…
[Trent leans over and whispers but the microphone picks it up.]
Trent Jones: No shit dumbass no one cares about women pretending to wrestle. This is the biggest trash tournament ever. But dude if i get Mr. Bones wet tonight and get some of that 2 million dollars I am all about pretending to care about these bitches.
[Trent sits back up and smiles. ]
Trent Jones: Well let’s watch this first entrace we have the very Sexy….
Layton Cook: You have no idea who is in this match do you?
Trent Jones: Can we just call them Contestant 1 and Contestant 2
Layton Cook: Hannah Rockford is the first
[We Appreciate Power starts playing as the long dirty blonde-haired women makes her way to the ring. ]
Trent Jones: I just feel an instant connection to…
Layton Cook: Its Hannah Rockford.
[Hannah shakes hands with a few fans as she slides in the ring.]
Trent Jones: This chick is legal age right?
Layton Cook: Lucky for you I did my research she is a 20-year-old from someplace in Ireland.
Trent Jones: So she might want to suck me lucky charm?
Layton Cook: It is of no surprise that you are single. Now you can see the other girl her name is Melody doll.
Trent Jones: I once had this buddy who had a sex doll. He always said he got tired blowing it up and he would twist her midsection because he was light-headed. I tried to tell him to get one of those terrorist dolls as they blow themselves up but he doesn’t listen.
Layton Cook: Your that friend aren’t you?
[Dollhouse starts playing as the dark hared Melody doll steps out into the smoke-filled area as the lights dim.]
Trent Jones: Well damn look at this bitc.. I mean look at this sexy thing, this girl looks like she would either gut you or service you… or possibly both. So tell me, Layton, what do you know about this girl.
Layton Cook: She and her sister make up a tag team normally but Melody is I think 27 if I remember right. Melody is a hardcore wrestler and honestly legit crazy.
[The two women are in the ring as the smoke clears the two women are looking at each other waiting for the bell to ring. The bell rings.]
Trent Jones: Well let’s see what woman is going to earn my Bone.
Layton Cook: Well Melody moved quick and just delivered a knee to the gut of Hannah and quickly continues the attack. Melody is delivering punches… So Trent is the Bone like the rose on the Bachelor?
Trent Jones: Well if the guy on the show has a huge pork sword and wants to give it to the winner then yes…. If not then no. Well Hannah is back to her feet and she looks like my ex-girlfriend when I forgot to remind her when I was about to..
Layton Cook: Oh crap another big kick from Melody sends Hannah back against the ropes. Melody Charges in and Hannah ducks out of the way and delivers a smashing blow to the midsection to Melody as she hits the rope.
Trent Jones: Hannah is continuing to throw blows this blonde chick really wants to win the chance to date me.
Layton Cook: She must have heard you as she just let Melody get lose and the two are throwing punches at each other. These ladies are going all out tonight to give the fans a great match. Melody drops to a knee as Hannah then tackles her to the ground.
Trent Jones: There is something sexy about an Irish girl’s light skin on black leather. But it is even sexier watching Melody and Hannah all over each other. Damn, Tag me in let me get in this match. I will let both of them deliver some big blows.
Layton Cook: While you daydream about something that wont happen. Let me talk about how great these ladies are going at it. Melody has Hannah in a chokehold and she starts to wrap her legs around Hannah. And here comes the next dirty comment from Trent Jones.
Trent Jones: That’s not true. Hannah is starting to struggle to breathe as those sexy leather-covered legs wrap tighter and tighter around her midsection. The thigh gap is hard to see but her monkey is pressed tightly against Hannah’s sexy little ass.
Layton Cook: Hannah is slowly reaching for the ropes. But she is getting closer to it. She is dragging both her and Melody’s weight. She grabs the rope and Melody rolls off and jumps up and kicks Hannah out of the ring.
Trent Jones: My girl Melody is about to win and move closer to winning the money.
Layton Cook: Hannah is using most of the referee’s 10 count, but she is back inside of the ring.
[The two women lock up and Melody goes to whip Hannah into the corner but Hannah digs in deep and reverses the move and sends Melody into the corner. She slams into the corner. Hannah moves in quickly.]
Layton Cook: She is back at it and delivers three quick blows to the head… Trent dont say a word. Hannah sends Melody out of the corner and quickly delivers a double-handed blow to the back of the neck on Melody.
Trent Jones: Melody just went down faster than a fat girl trying to earn some free cake.
Layton Cook: And to think SWAT was not wanting to let us call one match… I now see why.
Trent Jones: That’s cause they suck but both of these ladies are standing and you can see both of their tanks are on empty.
Layton Cook: Melody swings and connects, but Hannah throws a punch back. They both keep swinging back and forth and they are both going all out. Two million dollars will have that effect on you.
Trent Jones: Like me wanting in on that two million I am willing to slap uglies with one of these girls. But at the end of the day, only one skank can win.
[Melody lands a hell of an uppercut and she grabs her and lands a triple Alabama slam]
Layton Cook: That’s Melody’s move she calls the Raggedy Anne
Trent Jones: The fingers to the mouth move is something I see more and more in some hardcore porn lately. However, Hannah doesn’t seem to like it.
Layton Cook: Hannah just bit Melody’s hand to break the hold.
Trent Jones: Well for the record Hannah wasn’t the one i was worried about biting Mr. Bone but now I am.
Layton Cook: Jesus Melody just landed her porcelain thumbnail finisher and she is going for the cover.
Trent Jones: She went down harder than my boner that time the stripper with the big ass tits, dick popped out.
Layton Cook: Jesus... help me.
1….
2….
3
Trent Jones: Well looks like Melody Doll is going to be my girl for the moment
[Melody is standing in the ring looking down at Hannah laying in the ring. Trent Jones slides in with candy heart and some flowers. Melody looks at Trent as he walks over with the gifts. Trent hands then to her and she takes them.]
Layton Cook: Oh shit she accepted the gift….. oh my god she just punched Trent in the bald and smashes the heart candy in his face and bites the head of the flowers off. She spits them in his face this bitch just rejected me boy.
Layton Cook: Well she is moving on, in other news both Hannah and Trent are starting to move, Trent looking at Melody with a corny ‘true love’ face, he LIKED IT!
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Post by edwarddubin0604 on Jan 31, 2020 20:27:28 GMT -5
(The room is dark and cod as the cameraman slowly and carefully walks into the room and there is a black silhouette in front there is a loud clap and lights go on revealing Psychotic Goth. There is an evil grin on his face as slowly raises his head and looks into the camera with a demonic gleam in his eyes.)
Psychotic Goth: "Hello again. I see that Jonnie Valentine's been showing why he's the biggest joke in SWAT and the worst and most pathetic champion in SWAT. While he's doing SNL and all these commercials that claim all these lies about getting over your sexual problems and make you well again or extend your life beyond their years."
(He roars in an ancient dialect.)
Psychotic Goth: "You would expect better in a champion than this pathetically sad joke of a man. A sad shadow of himself who recruited a whore named Suzi Spitz using potions like cannabis and marijuana to lure her into his gang of old shits and fuckers.
it obviously didn't take much to lure the bitch into The New Society of the New Breed. Suzi you shall feel .the curse of Psychotic Goth and 'The King of the Goths' shall make sure you are totally cursed forever for your sin."
(Psychotic Goth bellows in an ancient dialect.)
Psychotic Goth: "Alex Winters. I see you have returned to SWAT with a new attitude and without that joke of a tag team partner Leon Washington. At least you got rid of that bunch of dead weight who thought he was a superhero but he was more of joke. The only thing we agree on is that Jonnie Valentine is a pathetic champion and you have an excellent chance of winning the Royal Rumble.
I look forward to facing you if you win and I win the SWAT World Championship. We teamed up in a six-man match against The KGB and we know each other's abilities. It should be quite intriguing if it should happen and it could happen. You should do well in your return to SWAT."
(There is an eerie pause and the silence is deafening.)
Psychotic Goth: "Team Fairtex. You shall fail just like Tong's wife Jade did in the women's tournament. Looks like you won't be able to buy the stock you bid so high on and was so overly valued. All you have to do to pay for it is sell Phantam's body to the highest bidder."
(He laughs maniacally and bellows in an ancient dialect.)
Psychotic Goth: "Good luck in selling all your possessions just to pay for all that stock in this company. You shall need it since I cursed you for betraying me and you shall continue to be cursed. Be assured about that Team Fairtex. Be assured about my curse and it's consequences and what it's going to wroth upon you."
(Psychotic Goth laughs even more maniacally and roars louder in an ancient dialect.)
Psychotic Goth: "As for you Melody Doll go back to your family of fuckin freaks or better yet go back to that cesspool basement that you live in with Ryan Cullen and whoever else you live with. Even better move in with Radu Matei and his soon to be dead body as he lies in s crypt never to be heard or seen from again. Even better I'll even destroy the crypt he and melody are in and never again will they be seen again. However, tonight in a matter of moments Jonnie Valentine shall see everything he holds dear be crushed and destroyed. My armies are going to ravage you all over the place and then raid your treasures and take all the valuables you own including the biggest prize and that's your title."
(He raises his arms as the lights increase the intensity of the brightness.)
Psychotic Goth: "Tonight Jonnie your shitty reign shall come to an end. The joke known as Jonnie Valentine shall also come to an end as well. I shall reestablish my darkness and I shall be more brutal than ever and I shall be even more sadistic when I win the SWAT World Heavyweight Championship. You and the rest of the SWAT roster has been warned if I should fulfill my prophecy and if and when it does. Darkness shall once again spread over SWAT. Thus I have spoken and thus I shall make my vow come true."
(Psychotic Goth slams his hands together and the lights suddenly go off and darkness quickly returns as he laughs demonically and the scene slowly fads to black.)
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Post by Trent Jones MR Bones. on Feb 1, 2020 12:45:34 GMT -5
A pre-recorded video feed starts to play
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Patched IN
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Trent Jones is seen inside a graveyard and a fire is burning in a trash can. Trent Jones has a full black leather jacket on and his black vest on over it. Trent Jones pulls out a metal mask and he places it over his face. He drops in something in the barrel and the flame turns green. A second man walks up dress in a white robe and he moves towards Trent Jones.
“Dude why the fuck is it a white robe this is not cool. I have spent most of my life trying to stay away from anyone with a white robe. My grandparents are rolling over in this graveyard.”
Trent shakes his head, “Brother LC, you have shown you deserve to be a Ryder and once you are patched in you can never turn away.”
“Unless I become a lawyer like Axewound…”
“You dont get to speak about Axewound…. Now do you want to be patched in or not? So shut the fuck up. LC, you are dressed in white as a symbol of being with soul. Are you ready to shed your soul and take the colors of the ryders and leave behind the life you had before? Your Ryder name was chosen but will not be reviewed prior to your commitment. So once more I ask you, Layton Cook, are you ready to become a Graveyard Ryder?”
Trent touches his head and closes his eyes he pictures the day Crossbone and his former brothers patched him in. He stood before a giant fire dressed in all white robe, the Ryders all stood with their black vest and a black metal mask. At that time the Graveyard Ryders were powerful and had so many members. Trent reopens his eyes and he looks at Layton Cook who is still standing in the white robe.
“I said Yes I am ready… You ok brother?”
Trent was struggling, but he wanted to complete the patching ceremony, “As Grandmaster, I ask that you step forward and shed that white robe and toss it into the fire.”
Again, Trent, had a vision flash before him. But this was different this was a vision of the future of the Ryders. He, Layton Cook, and Axebone (Alex Stone) were sitting in the Ryder Club House. A 4th member walks in but it all goes fuzzy. Trent opens his eyes once more and sees that Layton has removed the white robe.
“Layton Cook please drop your soul into the flame and become one of us.”
It was then that the other members would have chanted One of us… One of us. However, considering there was no other members to do it. The robe hit the flames and goes up in huge flames.
“What the fuck!”
“Dude is not a big deal, I had soaked your robe in some different flammable items. Wanted to give you the full effect of watching your soul go up in flames.”
Layton wanted to argue more but let it go. He was thinking what if he had got closer to the flame with the robe still on.
“Ryders tonight we ride with our newest brother… Bone Crusher… Bone Crusher you are now a member take this black vest and protect it at cost. Well, I ordered your name patch but it was coming from Wish. So it looks like it is on hold. I am sorry homie so, for now, it has masking tape and sharpie patch with your name on it.”
Trent handed the vest to Layton aka Bone Crusher. Layton puts on his vest.
“Now we have been in a lot of trouble so we dont use are gang names all the time unless we are doing gang business. Axebone has told me to not really do any gang talk on camera.”
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At the Halfway House
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Trent Jones is sitting in his bedroom at the halfway house. His cell rings, it says Axebone. Trent answers his phone, as he kicks his boots off.
“What up Axebone…. I mean Alex Stone”
You can hear Alex’s voice on the other end, “What the fuck is wrong with you, I just got a call from someone who works for swat and let me know you patched in a new member… I mean for fuck sake what part of pretending like the gang is dead dont you understand.” he pauses, “Please for the love of god tell me you are not being filmed now?” He waits and gets no reply and hangs up.
“Well good talk Alex”
Trent tosses his phone down and lays back on his bed. “I tried to watch some old matches off this list of trash and I couldn’t find one match that impressed me. Is this really what XHF is all about. I can tell you this I am going to win the big title in XHF in 2020. This place should be kissing my ass and begging me to stay around. What a fucking disgrace this place is. I could have defeated both the SWAT team and the Ksomething team. Truly was that the best two teams they could come up with. Frostbite helped the other special needs team to win the gold medal. But really who cares that one team of {Mongo Edit: Nah we don't say that anymore} trash defeated another team of {Mongo Edit: Nah we don't say that anymore} trash.”
Trent wast playing a disrespectful asshole he was an asshole but he truly hates everyone in SWAT. He is the one-man that stands alone in SWAT, XHF even the wrestling world. He has no relationships with anyone. He avoids everyone in SWAT. Backstage he tells them to fuck off or just avoids them.
Trent looks over at his door as Layton Cook walks in.
“Trent I have watched every person in this rumble and I have to say you go all out this is your rumble to win. These others are all looking past you. But get some rest and let’s head out in the morning.”
A few hours later .
Trent wakes up and he is drenched and shaking. He stumbles as he tries to stand up. Trent vision goes fuzzy as a dark haired leprechaun walks in the room. Trent tried to lift his head but he quickly gave up.
“Get up Tren don’t die on us.” Said the little leprechaun. The little guy quickly runs towards Trent. Well face it he had little legs so it wasn’t quickly but the little legs were moving fast. He touched Trent and felt the heat coming off of his body. He reached for his cellphone. The damn iPhone7 looked huge in his little fingers. Hell it wasn’t even a plus and it looked like an iPad. “We need an ambulance to *beep* north street at the *beep* home. Trent Jones is down on the ground and I think he is on his way to dying. Please come quick.”
The magical little leprechaun stays on the phone and keeps checking on Trent. He leaves the room and you see an ambulance light flashing out front. Trents vision goes dark.
Trents eyes open and he is in a hospital room with a huge light above him. He has wires hooked to him and he can feel the tubes hooked to his head. A team of doctors walk in and Layton Cook walks in as well.
“Trent your awake… dude I thought you were dead!” Layton cook stands next to Trent. Trent tried to speak but one of the doctors spoke up first.
“Mr. Jones you are in the hospital. You have an infection from your head wound and your non medical rusty staples you used to close your head wound. You are lucky your still alive. We want to keep you for the next few days and keep a close eye on you. You need to take a few weeks off of work and let your head heal up. We are currently running 3 different antibiotics through your system. We will let you rest and check on you in a few.”
The doctors walked out of the room and Trent looks at Layton Cook. Layton reaches for his cell phone, “Trent, I am going to call SWAT and let them know you can’t go.” As the words come out of layton mouth. Trent lifts his hand and grabs the cell from Layton Cook. His eyes say no.
“I am still Going!”
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Live Feed Backstage
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Trent Jones is sitting in the food area and he has a huge bag of ice on his crotch area. Other people backstage are giving him a dirty look as he has his legs up on the table. “That bitch rejected my offer I could have had a lot of fun with her money.” Trent removes the bag of ice and you see a blurred out sack of Trent hanging out of his pants. He tucks his bean bag boys back in his pants. He stands up and dumps the bag of ice back into the cold food area. If looks could kill, he would be dead. However, Trent dont give a shit and he makes his way to the entrance area.
“Start my fucking music”
The Arena lights dim as a Blue Light Shines down on the Entrance way. Ride to Live, Live to ride starts playing. Some Smoke starts coming out of the entrance ramp as Trent Jones Walks out with his dark black leather pants and his black leather vest. Layton Cook is next to him, He has on his leather vest as well, Trent holds up his right fist in the air and the light goes out. When the lights come back on Trent Jones is standing in the ring with a microphone and Layton Cook is being handed one as well.
“SWAT its your boy Trent Jones AKA Mr. Bones and standing next to me is the wise and smart Layton Cook aka Bone Crusher. He told me the other day that I needed to address the fans and the network more if I wanted to reach the top. Well guess what I am address all you fucking retards and guess what I am still not getting the respect.”
The crowd starts booing and some fans cheer for the bastard.
“Mr. Bones, is the soon to be champion here in SWAT and tonight he is going to take out a large pile of trash. People like, Tong and Phantom Fairtex.”
Trent cuts him off, “How cute we have a couple that is a tag team… I bet in the ring isn’t the only thing they tag team.”
“Trent they are twins!”
“You know gay couples can dress alike, just like men and women couples can dress alike. They look fucking stupid but it can be done. Its 2020 its time you stop judging people by their looks or what they like to do in the bedroom.”
“Ok…. so moving on, we have Alex Turner. Alex is...”
“Big time Trash, just like Frosty the {Mongo Edit: Nah we don't say that anymore} snow man, plus that Bouncer from Hell… if I didnt know better I would have thought it was another name for Duke Kosloff. People seem to like this Syberus guy, I thought that was a character from Hairy Cooter.”
“You mean Harry Potter”
“No I don’t I know what I mean. It is a great story I am on page 8 episode 10 on pornhub.com. I start to get a boner thinking about it but then I lose it. Because we got Marty Donovovan or little dick as the ladies call him. The dude is a pussy that wrestles in little underwear… like i am sorry but no guy should wrestle like that today. Little Dick won't win this match. You fans deserve better than Jobbers Like Tuxedo Mask, and all the scary monsters, Doomsday, Karnage, Lucifer and Rusian mistake kosloff.”
“I wonder if the cab guy from dead pool can show up tonight if he doesn't have a car full of people. But you know trent some guys like Caffrey and TJ Zousa all want to win this Match and we have so many more but you know what none of these people have?”
“Talent?”
Both guys laugh and decide to move on from this stupid shit and get real with the fans. Trent Leans on the ropes and looks out at some fans as he speaks.
“Ladies and Gentlemen the truth is the Doctors don't want me to wrestle tonight. But guess what those idiots don't tell me shit. I am here tonight because this is the only way this place is going to give me a title shot. I have to win this rumble otherwise the chance is never coming my way. They don’t want me to hold the strap here they want losers like Duke, Frostbite and caffery and they know if I win it the networked stars have no shot. I have a target on my back and tonight these people will gang up on me. I am use to being the enemy… Trent Jones Mr. Bones is the real deal and I am Killin it.”
“Mr. Bones was minutes from death if..”
“The leprechaun saved me.” Layton Cook Looked at him with a what the fuck look. “I didn’t tell you a leprechaun came in and called and saved me.”
“Um you know it was Ray that found you right he heard you hit the ground?”
“Who? No it was a little guy… he was tiny”
“Yeah you dumb ass its the midget Ray that lives in the house with us. He isn't a leprechaun he is a dwarf or whatever you call it. You are lucky he found you.”
“So tonight I am going all in, I am going against doctor's orders and even against my lawyers. So I openly admit I am not 100% but this is the big shot to get the biggest shot of my life. You see any other wrestler here would be sitting in the hospital. But not me not the next SWAT champion.”
Trent Jones points to where the belt is going to go. The fans seem to respect Tret for fighting thought an infection in his head.
“Trent Jones ladies and Gentleman he may not be the fan friendly role model but he is a warrior and tonight he will stand victories.”
“Last words before I go, I am the baddest motherfucker to ever walk down to this ring and tonight I prove it…. Hate me all you want but you will respect me.”
Trent Drops his microphone and so does Layton Cook as they walk to the back
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Post by edwarddubin0604 on Feb 1, 2020 21:22:52 GMT -5
(Team Fairtex are watching Mr. Bone's Trent Jones and Layton Cook's promo shaking their heads their arms folded as they listen to what they are saying. They are dressed in their KGB hoodies and caps.)
Tong Fairtex: "You know Phantam it seems some of the competitors have really big mouths going into the Royal Rumble."
Phantam Fairtex: "Yeah there's the not so Philly Special Anthony McCaffrey."
Tong Fairtex: "The O-Z."
Phantam Fairtex: "Trent Jones and Layton Cook."
(Katie Moss goes up to them a look of trepidation on her face.)
Tong Fairtex: "Kate what's up....."
(Katie Moss looks reluctant to speak but sighs and does.)
Katie Moss: "I'm a bit upset...."
(Team Fairtex look at each other.)
Tong Fairtex: "You're upset over Frostbite's comments about you."
Katie Moss: "Yeah."
Tong Fairtex: "Look Frostbite's Frostbite no matter what anyone thinks about him. Don't mind him Katie just ask who you're scheduled to be interviewing and ask not to interview Frostbite."
Katie Moss: "I hope that works."
Tong Fairtex: "It should. Now what's the honor of your presence."
Katie Moss: "I heard you mentioning some of the participants in the Royal Rumble."
Tong Fairtex: "They were doing the samething and we couldn't let them go unanswered."
Phantam Fairtex: "Then again that's rather obvious in wrestling or anywhere for that matter."
Katie Moss: "What are your thoughts about some of the participants."
Tong Fairtex: "Let's start with the O-Z. Let's get something straight you dumbass scrubs. You think you're gong to eliminate us and get some level of revenge for our little ultimatum what you and The Indian Warriors did to our esteemed new commissioner Zoran Sainovic."
Phantam Fairtex: "Yeah a nice little set up by you four assholes but guess what boys. In moments you're going to be in the Royal Rumble facing The KGB and we have a few sore spots to settle in the ring during it. You'll be lucky to avoid us or maybe you'll mess with the wrong opponent and get your asses tossed before we get to you if you should be so lucky."
Katie Moss: "You also mentioned newcomer Anthony McCaffrey."
Tong Fsirtex: "Yeah we mentioned that not so Philly Special. He thinks that just because he ran his own promotion...."
Phantam Fairtex: "Into the ground we might add."
Tong Fairtex: "He can come into SWAT and declare himself some sort of 'Wrestling God' as a great wrestler once opined. You see you're not in the dead and buried AXW or the AWF where one of our friends is wrestling there I might add. You're in SWAT Mr. Caffeinated and like we mentioned Soutter makes the rules and he calls the shots."
Phantam Fairtex: "So get that through your overstuffed ego and make sure your geek glasses are perfectly wiped clean because you're going to find yourself flying through the goal posts and out of the ring. Now you're thinking you're some kind of ego driven underdog but to us you're just plain filled with ego."
Katie Moss: "You seemed to have made enemies out of Satan's Disciples."
Tong Fairtex: "Yeah because of a little technicality or is it a referee oversight. Yeah we heard you were gong to throw us over the ropes or is it chokeslam us over the ropes. Easier said than done Satan's Disciples."
Phantam Fairtex: "Of course Frostbite has issues with them since he was carrying their dead weight or years from what he told us.
If that's what Satan's Disciples needed to get over the top and succeed in their careers everywhere they wrestled. They must have been pathetic but we'll see what's going to happen and if Frostbite asks for our help. Then we'll make sure he gets it and throws Satan's Disciples over the top rope and back into the pit of hell they belong in."
Tong Fairtex: "Psychotic Goth can argue their case and get them acquitted for having no brains and they can do his bidding."
Phantam fairtex: "Devil's Advocate fits his profile perfectly."
Katie Moss: "Newcomer Seiji and Shimuzu also had issues with you as well."
Tong Fairtex: "What else is new with Asian machismo. Let them go ahead and show how much we deal with issues that any opponent has with us. You see I have an issue with you since Albion Gale defeated my wife Jade. So if you didn't motivate me before I'm going to be truly motivated now and believe me you'll be the one flying over the top ropes faster than Dragon Ball Z can say Supersayah."
Phantam Fairtex: "Careful what you wish for you'll just might get it and Shimuzu that's what you'll be looking at if you think we'll be eliminated by you two."
Katie Moss: "They're one in the same."
Tong Fairtex: "We stand corrected."
Katie Moss: "What do you think of Trent sand Layton's comments about you."
Tong Fairtex: "You know from someone who as another famous wrestler said of his brother...."
Phantam Fairtex: "Which isn't us we might add."
Tong Fairtex: "Anyway this wrestler once said 'It's just one match.' You see Trent you defeated Russian Nightmare in a Dumpster Match and that's just one match. One stinking match and you think you are top contender material. Well there's going to be plenty of other people including Russian Nightmare and he probably still has issues with you."
Phantam Fairtex: "You'll be wishing it was Freddy Krueger you're facing in the mood he's in. Now imagine not being able to get a date with any of the first round winners of the $2,000,000 Women's Tournament. I thought he had a great chance with Melody Doll but he doesn't like fingers in his mouth unless he can suck on them."
Katie Moss: "I guess Jade was lucky she didn't win."
Tong Fairtex: "She wasn't just lucky. She saved Trent plenty of trouble and I don't just mean because she's my wife. Jade would have made sure he never would have participated in the Royal Rumble by breaking every bone in his body and he would need a gurney just to get to ringside. He'll look like Radu Matei only worse if Jade got through with him."
Phantam Fairtex: "Not pretty Katie."
Katie Moss: "He and Cook may want to eliminate the tewo of you."
Tong Fairtex: "Yeah and everyone else in the Royal Rumble. Alliances are made and broken but tag teams are forever loyal to each other."
Phantam Fairtex: "Except in a few cases. You know what they say everyman for themselves."
Katie Moss: "What if you two have to eliminate each other."
(Team Fairtex looks at each other.)
Tong Fairtex: "We're competitive and we both know the sport.
Phantam Fairtex: "This is professional wrestling after all."
Katie Moss: "One last thing what are your chances of getting Pesci's stake in SWAT."
Phantam Fairtex: "I think I have a great chance just like one of us has a great chance of winning the Royal Rumble."
Katie Moss: "Well I wish you both luck."
Tong Fairtex: "Thanks and keep up the good work. Let's go bro."
Phantam Fairtex: "Right behind you bro."
(They leave.)
Katie Moss: "Well Team Fairtex looks confident. Back to you guys."
(The scene slowly fades to black.)
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Feb 1, 2020 21:53:21 GMT -5
Jeremy Tucker: Coming up is the first round match between "Lucky" Linda La Fey and former SWAT World Champion Suzi Spitz. Linda La Fey is the heart and soul of SWAT.
Andrew Fulton: Eee. Pump the breaks there, Jerry, Everyone knows I'm the heart and soul of SWAT.
Jeremy Tucker: You need an armed guard to get to your car.
Andrew Fulton: You sound like my handler from Witness Protection. Most of my death threats are just people letting off steam.These people love me with all their fat, greasy hearts. That smell.
Jeremy Tucker: Noted. The winner will go on to face Melody Doll who defeated Hannah Rockford earlier tonight. Suzi Spitz recently shocked the world and joined The Society of the New Breed during the war games match against the KGB. Now she hopes to prove herself one of the best, male or female, in wrestling by winning this tournament.
["Linger" by The Cranberries plays and The Amazons Arena roars. "Lucky" Linda La Fey walks down the aisle, slapping the fans hands and giving high fives]
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey took issue with Suzi Spitz joining The Society saying their worse than the KGB.
Andrew Fulton: Hey! No one's worse than the KGB. Wait, no. You know what I mean.
Jeremy Tucker: Linda wants a win here not only to advance to the second round, but also to gain an advantage the next time these two face one another for Suzi Spitz's Pan Am Championship.
Frank Salazar: "The following contest is part of the first round of the $2 Million Dollar Tournament. It is scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Featuring first, from Dublin, Ireland; Standing 5 feet 5 inches tall; Weighing 130 pounds...'LUCKY' LINDA LA FEY!!!"
[The New York crowd gives "Lucky" Linda La Fey a huge ovation. Then the opening chords of "C.O.D." by AC/DC plays and the audience cheers. Suzi Spitz walks out wearing her SWAT Pan Am Championshop and starts high fiving fans]
Jeremy Tucker: In Greensboro, North Carolina, Suzi Spitz became the first female member of The Society of the New Breed. She and Jonnie had taken one another to their limits, and earned Jonnie's respect. But it's not his respect she was after. She's now in the most powerful group in SWAT.
Andrew Fulton: Who says? The KGB has the SWAT Tag Team titles, the women's championship, and they just beat Jonnie and his Team SWAT in the war games. I say that's the tiebreaker.
Jeremy Tucker: They only won that match because Frostbite turned on Team SWAT and joined The KGB!
Andrew Fulton: My point exactly.
[Andrew Fulton lights up a cigarette]
Jeremy Tucker: What? What are you doing?
Andrew Fulton: I'm not heading out and smoking by the bleeding dumpster during the promos anymore, I tell ya that!
Frank Salazar: And her opponent is from New Orleans, Louisiana; Standing feet inches; Weighing pounds; She is The SWAT Pan Am Champion, and she's A Little Piece of Heaven that's Hotter than Hell...SUZIE SPITZ!!!"
[The Amazons Arena roars! Suzie holds up her SWAT Pan Am Championship and then hands it to Tommy Milligan. Linda La Fey pulls on the ropes, and loosens up her neck as Milligan signals for the bell]
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz and "Lucky" Linda La Fey meet in the center of the ring and start exchanging blistering chops!
[The New York fans "Woo!" with each chop. La Fey gains the advantage, and whacks Spitz with one last one]
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey takes Spitz over in a snapmare.
Andrew Fulton: And she lands a good kick between Suzi's shoulder blades!
[The Amazons Arena lets out a collective "OH!" as Suzi arches her back in pain. La Fey pulls her up and irish whips her but Suzi holds onto her arm and pulls her into a shortarm clothesline]
Andrew Fulton: Turned La Fey inside out with that one she did.
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz pulls her up and applies an abdominal stretch.
[Suzie Spitz sticks her foot and pulls back on Linda La Fey's arm. Tommy Milligan checks in but La Fey shakes her head]
Andrew Fulton: "Lucky" Linda La Fey plants her foot and hiptosses her way out of the abdominal stretch.
Jeremy Tucker: She rocks Suzi with a european uppercut. Another one, that rattles Spitz in the jaw.
[Linda La Fey hooks her up and flips her to the mat with a lightning fast snap suplex. When Suzi gets to her feet, La Fey gets ties up their legs and snaps back into a russian legsweep]
Jeremy Tucker: Irish Legsweep!
Andrew Fulton: Linda La Fey tries to go for a suplex, but Suzi blocks it.
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz counters with a suplex of her own and rolls over into a cover.
Referee: 1...(Linda La Fey kicks out)
Andrew Fulton: Ugh, Suzi didn't like that so now she's clawing at La Fey's eyes with those nails of hers!
[Tommy Milligan finally pulls Suzi off of La Fey, but she shoves him away. She pulls up Linda into a cobra clutch]
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz pulling back on La Fey's wrist while applying pressure to the back of Linda's neck.
Andrew Fulton: Referee Tommy Milligan checking in to see if La Fey's arms are dropping, but she's holding them up.
[Linda La Fey backpeddles into the corner until she squashes Suzi against the turnbuckles. She irish whips Spitz into the opposite corner, then follows her in with a clothesline]
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey irish whips her into the ropes, and dips down for a backdrop, but Suzi catches her with a DDT!
[The Amazons Arena cheers! La Fey gets up and catches some more chops, but she ducks the last one and german suplexes Suzi]
Jeremy Tucker: Irish Suplex!
Referee: 1...2...(Suzi Spitz rolls her shoulder up)
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey grabs Suzi by the hair and tosses her over the top rope!
[The New York fans let out a collective "OH!" at the way Suzi lands on the floor. Linda waits for her to get up and then runs and hops onto the middle of the top rope]
Jeremy Tucker: Linda La Fey with a springboard senton on the outside to Suzi Spitz!!
[The crowd hops up and down and starts chanting "LIN-DA! LIN-DA! LIN-DA!"]
Andrew Fulton: Linda La Fey pulling out all the stops for that two million dollars!
Jeremy Tucker: La Fey pulls Suzi up by her hair, but Suzi starts biting La Fey on the forehead!!
[La Fey cries out in pain, and Tommy Milligan slides outside the ring to try and stop Suzi. Spitz pushes him into the apron, and then running clotheslines La Fey over the guardrail into the crowd!! The audience lets out another "OH!" at the sound of La Fey hitting the guardrail]
Jeremy Tucker: Linda La Fey lying out among the front row right behind us.
Andrew Fulton: She better watch it with this lot, Jerry.
[Suzi Spitz pulls her by the hair over the security railing back into the ringside area. She scoops her up onto her shoulder, and tries to powerslam her head into the ringpost, but La Fey slips off her shoulder at the last minute and lets her slam facefirst into the cornerpost!! The Amazons Arena lets out a loud "OH!!"]
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey rolls Suzi Spitz back into the ring, and Suzi appears to have a small cut by her hairline.
Andrew Fulton: (rubs his hands together) Oh boy, our first blood of the night!
Jeremy Tucker: La Fey climbs to the top turnbuckle and catches Suzi Spitz with a blockbuster!
[Linda La Fey irish whips Spitz into the ropes and catches her in the face with a yakuza kick that pops the crowd]
Jeremy Tucker: IRA Kick!
Andrew Fulton: Suzi Spitz can barely get to her feet before "Lucky" Linda La Fey drives her bloody face into the mat with an X factor!
[Suzi leaves a small blood stain on the mat when she rolls over. Linda La Fey pulls her up by her hair and shoots her into the ropes, but Spitz comes back with a spinning back kick! The fans cheer]
Andrew Fulton: Suzi Spitz trying to clear the cobwebs now.
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi psyching herself up and starts ripping and scratching Linda's face up with her nails!
[The Amazons Arena cheers for the aggression! Suzi Spitz gets underneath La Fey and sambo suplexes her]
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz climbs to the top turnbuckle for her split legged moonsault but Linda La Fey pushes her butt, crotching her on the top turnbuckle. Linda La Fey pulls her back into a tree of woe!
Andrew Fulton: "Lucky" Linda La Fey gets a running start and flips into a cannonball on the trapped Suzi Spitz!
[Suzi has blood drip from her head to the mat below while she's hanging upside down. Linda La Fey climbs to the top turnbuckle]
Jeremy Tucker: Linda La Fey 450 missile dropkicks Suzi Spitz while she's in the tree of woe!!
[The audience lets out an "OH!!" at the sound of La Fey's boots hitting Suzi's face. Suzi collapses in a heap in the corner]
Jeremy Tucker: La Fey lifts Spitz up into a vertical suplex, but Suzi lands on her feet behind her back to back, and drops down into a reverse neckbreaker!
[The Amazons Arena pops as La Fey sits up, clutching the back of her neck. Suzi wipes some blood from her forehead and irish whips her into the corner, but Linda runs up the turnbuckles and twists back into a flying body press]
Referee: 1...2...(Suzi Spitz kicks out)
Jeremy Tucker: Both women try to get to a vertical base first, but Linda is faster and superkicks her upside the head!
[The New York crowd cheers! Both ladies go down lie fallen trees and lie next to one another, trying to catch their breath]
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz pulls herself up by the ropes, but "Lucky" Linda La Fey grabs her from behind with a backstabber!!
[Spitz arches her back in pain as blood runs down her face. Linda La Fey pulls her up and irish whips her into the corner]
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey runs in and leaps into a huracanrana, but Suzie catches her, and runs into the middle of the ring with a powerbomb!!
Referee: 1...2...(Linda La Fey gets her shoulder up)
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz measures Linda La Fey and then hits her with a nice dropkick! Wow! Looks like she's been working with The Human Dropkick Machine on that one.
[Some fans in the crowd give Spitz the golf clap as she tries to wipe the blood out of her eyes.
Andrew Fulton: Probably picked that one up watching Timeless tapes.
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz pulls her up into a DDT, but "Lucky" Linda La Fey flips her in a northern lights suplex!
Referee: 1...2...(Suzi Spitz gets her shoulder up)
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey catches Suzi Spitz with a dropkick of her own!
[Linda mockingly applauds herself and then flips into a standing moonsault]
Referee: 1...2...(Suzi Spitz kicks out)
Jeremy Tucker: Spitz gets to her feet and ducks a superkick, gets behind Linda, and release german suplexes her on the back of her neck!
Andrew Fulton: No bridge, all impact!
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz double underhooks Linda's arms, and then double underhooks her up and down across her knee with a backbreaker!!
[Linda La Fey cries out in pain, but Suzi quickly hooks her in a suplex, cradles her leg, and flips her into a fisherman's suplex]
Referee: 1...2...(Linda La Fey kicks out)
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz wipes some more blood from her brow, and then climbs the turnbuckles, she flips into a split-legged moonsault, but Linda La Fey puts her knees up!!
[The New York audience cheers! Suzie Spitz clutches her ribs and flops around on the mat like a fish. "Lucky" Linda La Fey ties up her legs with her hands and rolls her over into a texas cloverleaf]
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey cranking back on Suzi's legs, bending her in half.
Andrew Fulton: Referee Tommy Milligan in perfect position, asking Suzi if she wants to tap out.
[Suzi Spitz bleeds a pool of blood under her face as she pushes up and crawls, inch by inch to the ropes. She finally hooks the ropes and the audience applauds]
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi pulls herself up along the ropes. "Lucky" Linda La Fey grabs her around the neck for an exploder suplex, but Suzi knees her in the stomach. She pulls her up into a sitout tigerbomb!!
Referee: 1...2...(Linda La Fey kicks out)
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz irish whips her into the ropes and catches her with an Oral Victory huracanrana with a cradle!!
Referee: 1...2...(Linda La Fey pulls her down into a sunset flip)
Referee: 1...2...3!!!
[The bell rings and both girls get to their knees questioning Tommy Milligan's decision. "Linger" by Cranberries plays and the fans cheer as Suzi covers her face in anger and exhaustion. Linda pumps her fist as she leans against the ropes]
Frank Salazar: The winner of the match, 'LUCKY' LINDA LA Fey!!!"
Jeremy Tucker: "Lucky" Linda La Fey was able to reverse The Oral Victory at the last minute advancing to the second round of the Two Million Dollar Tournament.
Andrew Fulton: She goes on to face the positively creepy Melody Doll in the next round.
Jeremy Tucker: Suzi Spitz hit that ringpost earlier in the match, and that clearly effected her the rest of the contest.
Andrew Fulton: Just a bump on the head, Jerry. If you can't stand the heat stay out of the kitchen.
[Linda La Fey runs back up the ramp, slapping the fans hands]
Jeremy Tucker: Linda La Fey and Melody Doll is a great match for the second round, fans, we'll be right back with more of the women's tournament.
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Post by The Shattered Dolls on Feb 1, 2020 22:38:28 GMT -5
The crowd is going crazy as "No Mans Land 2020" continues, Melody Doll sits alone in her locker room with just a simple lantern lit for light. She has her favorite doll lying next to her on the cold hard concrete floor as she tries to catch her breath from her match, she just had against Hannah Rockford. "Dollhouse" by Melanie Martinez can be heard playing softly in the background.
The light flickers from the lantern as a gust of air rushes by from the air conditioner as it kicks on. Melody Doll starts to smile as she picks up her doll, holding it close to her she begins to rock back and forth. A child's laughter can be heard throughout the locker room as it gets louder and louder it begins to draw attention to those passing by the room.
people begin to stop and listen at the door, wondering what a child's doing alone in a dark locker room. As the crowd gets even larger they begin to hear the laughter stops as it turns into a one-person conversation. The listeners don't know what to think about it, as some shiver, some laugh and some appear to be in shock at the words being spoken.
~Melody Doll~
Dolly, I told you I would beat Hannah, I always keep my promises. Well, I know I said that I would have a new dress for you next time I saw you but I haven't been to the store yet. Tomorrow we will go to buy you that new dress, yes Dolly a black dress.
~Melody Doll~
Oh, yes, Dolly my next match should be so interesting, we face someone who says she is the heartbeat of this companies Amazons division. You do know what The Puppetmaster says about a heartbeat, right Dolly?
Melody Doll begins to laugh a bit as she smiles at her doll.
~Melody Doll~
It only takes a second to stop a heartbeat!!!
~Melody Doll~
Oh, yes he will be very happy that I remember every lesson he taught us growing up, I know how to stop that heartbeat, to make it nothing more than a lump of putrid flesh.
~Melody Doll~
This Linda La Fey says she is the life and soul of SWAT, I was so happy to hear her say that Dolly. The Puppetmaster taught us how to capture the soul of things how to bind those souls to the darkness or how to kill the soul of an enemy. That means when I step into the ring with Linda La Fey tonight I will basically take the life force of Swat, the heartbeat of the Amazons division and deliver them into the darkness, by shattering them.
The crowd now about twenty people deep are all standing in silence as the hush anyone who comes by making noise, they want to hear what Melody Doll has to say. One of the camera crew slipped a microphone under the door so they could broadcast the conversation throughout the arena.
~Melody Doll~
My sisters will be so proud that I have won my first-round match and after I win my next match against Linda La Fey, they will realize just what I have been telling them all along I may be shattered but I am not broken! I can do this on my own, I will win this tournament and make a name not only for The Shattered Dolls but for myself Melody Doll.
~Melody Doll~
Dolly, you're my best friend, of course, I will bring you with me to the ring so you can watch me take the heart and soul from SWAT.
The fans in attendance are going crazy with mixed emotions as they hear this conversation and aren't sure what to think exactly.
~Melody Doll~
Thank you, Dolly, I almost forgot about Linda saying that, to her first opponent Suzi Spitz. Linda La Fey maybe "Lady Luck" but what is that old saying Dolly, oh yeah, that's right, luck runs out!!!
~Melody Doll~
Linda's luck has run out tonight because when you step into the darkness there's nothing to see, nothing to save you and nothing to cling too. Luck just will not be able to find her, see her or cling to her.
~Melody Doll~
Besides Mr. Cullen says we have to win, if we want to remain a part of The Dark Carnival, he says he will do more than shatter us if we lose he will burn down the Dollhouse. We can't lose the Dollhouse it's all we have, and our sisters would be mad at us too.
The crowd outside the door and in the arena begin to feel for Melody Doll and what she has been through, they are beginning to understand what she has to do and why.
~Melody Doll~
Oh, Dolly could you imagine if we won 2 million dollars, what a Dollhouse I could by you, and we could even buy you a black velvet dress with black hair ties you would look so pretty.
~Melody Doll~
it's almost time for me to get ready for my match Dolly, yes, shortly Linda La Fey will find out I may be shattered but I will never break.
Melody Smiles as she sets down her Doll...
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Post by vastrix on Feb 2, 2020 0:03:10 GMT -5
In the office of Dr. Vincent Miller, Tarrasque lays on a couch while Marcus Anderson sits in a chair opposite Dr. Vincent Miller himself.
Dr. Miller: So. The purpose of this session is to hypnotize Tarrasque and see if he can remember his name? Is it not Tarrasque?
Anderson: No, his handle is Tarrasque. That’s the name he was given when he was transformed into the weapon known as Tarrasque. He wants to know the name his parents gave him. He no longer remembers.
Dr. Miller rubs his chin while looking at the paperwork in front of him that was filled out by Marcus Anderson.
Dr. Miller: Alright. Let’s begin, shall we? Tarrasque, look at this medallion. Follow it with your eyes.
Tarrasque watches as Dr. Miller slowly swings a medallion side to side.
Dr, Miller: Just relax, Tarrasque. Breathe in, breathe out. Focus on the medallion and my words as slumber takes you. You are getting very sleepy.
Tarrasque follows the medallion with his eyes as Dr. Miller drones on. His eyelids getting heavier and heavier until he is asleep.
Dr. Miller: What is your name?
Tarrasque: Tarrasque.
Dr. Miller: No. What do people call you?
Tarrasque: Beast.
Dr. Miller: No. What is your childhood name?
Tarrasque: Me name...me name…
Tarrasque goes into a seizure like he was being shocked by something. He lets out a howl of pain. Once he stops seizing, he seems to relax.
Tarrasque: Me name Tarrasque.
Dr. Vincent Miller frowns, looking to Marcus.
Dr. Miller: He’s reacting like there’s a block on his memory. Somebody wanted his previous name gone forever. Why do you think that is, Marcus?
Marcus watches Tarrasque laying on the couch with some concern. He finally looks to Dr. Miller with a shrug.
Anderson: I really don’t know. Like they wanted his entire past life erased so he would know nothing, but the orders that they gave him.
Dr. Miller: Orders that they gave him? You had mentioned that he was transformed into a weapon. I don’t understand. How was he transformed?
Anderson: My father told it to me like this. He was taken from his home and given the dirty Captain America treatment with a side of brainwashing to make him into the perfect soldier. Only his mind broke under the pressure and he became the child-beast that he is today.
Dr. Miller: A “dirty” Captain America treatment?
Anderson: Yeah. Some kind of serum that transformed him along with cocktails of combat drugs. Mentally implanted skills and such.
Dr. Miller: I see. Then we need to get through the mental wall that was set up by these people in order to see if there’s anything left of his old life remaining in his mind. Tarrasque?
Tarrasque: Yes?
Dr. Miller: You have a wall in your mind, Tarrasque. A wall that is keeping you from your old life. I want you to envision the wall in your mind. Can you do that for me? Can you see the wall?
Tarrasque: Me see wall.
Dr. Miller: Good. Now then. Tear down the wall. Can you do that for me?
Tarrasque: Me try.
Tarrasque frowns, growling as he attempts to tear down the wall in his mind.
Tarrasque: Wall growing. Wall strong! Me no can. Me no can do.
Dr. Miller stands up, walks across the room, and gets into Tarrasque’s face.
Dr. Miller: Do it, Tarrasque! TEAR DOWN THE WALL!
Tarrasque: Me trying! Wall grow bigger!
Dr. Miller begins shaking Tarrasque by the shoulders, his face mere inches from Tarrasque’s.
Dr. Miller: TEAR DOWN THE WALL! TEAR DOWN THE WALL!
Tarrasque: NOOOOOO!
Tarrasque reaches out and seizes the Doctor by the throat, choking him with one meaty hand. He begins shaking the Doctor back and forth until Marcus can run over and work on prying Tarrasque’s fingers off the Doctor and getting him freed. The Doctor falls back to the floor, grasping at his throat.
Dr. Miller: I can’t. I can’t get him to break through his mental wall. It’s just too strong.
Marcus helps Dr. Miller to his feet.
Anderson: It’s alright. I have another method to try to find the answers. Can you do one more thing for me before waking him up? Tell him to win the rumble.
Dr. Miller: I can do that. Tarrasque? Repeat after me. I will win the rumble.
Tarrasque: Me win rumble.
Dr. Miller: I will win the rumble.
Tarrasque: Me win rumble.
Dr. Miller: I will win the rumble.
Tarrasque: Me win rumble.
Anderson: Good.
Days later, Marcus Anderson and Tarrasque are at a nightclub in a dark corner. Marcus Anderson is sipping at a beer while Tarrasque has a large bowl of spicy boneless wings that he pops several into his mouth at a time.
Marcus looks around at the waitresses that flit back and forth through the crowd to bring people their drink orders.
Anderson: I’m here at the right place and the right time. Where are you?
Tarrasque swallows a mouthful of meat, wiping wing sauce with the back of his hand.
Tarrasque: Me right here, Marcus.
Marcus blinks, looking at Tarrasque with a confused smile.
Anderson: No, man. I know you’re right here. I’m actually talking about-
“Me.”
Marcus nearly gives off a girly scream as the shadows seem to take shape next to him to form into “D” of RSW fame. He actually hasn’t been seen in public since RSW’s Pandemonium. Even without his “war paint” on, he is no less imposing.
Anderson: Well, you are here. Thank you.
D: What is it that you want from me?
Anderson: Well, Tarrasque needs to focus on winning a rumble at SWAT in order to go on to face Jonnie Valentine for the World title at the next show.
If D is impressed, he doesn’t show it. In fact, he doesn’t show any emotion at all.
D: And? What does this have to do with me?
Anderson: Tarrasque is more focused on finding what his real name is as opposed to winning this all important rumble.
D: Still not seeing the point here.
Anderson: I would like you to use your investigative skills to find out what Tarrasque’s real name is so that he can focus on his wrestling.
Tarrasque: Yeah.
There is a long silence that is only broken by the waitress coming to take orders. Tarrasque orders a refill on his bowl, Marcus another beer, and D orders a glass of water.
D: Just like that. You want me to go out and find his real name? Where is he from?
Anderson: Canada.
D: Can you get more specific? Canada is a large place.
Anderson: I’m afraid not.
Tarrasque: Me from Canada! Me am strong!
Marcus places a hand on Tarrasque’s shoulder, giving him a comforting smile.
Anderson: We know you’re strong, Tarrasque. You do a good job at wrestling.
Tarrasque pounds his chest with his fist, getting some sauce on his shirt.
Tarrasque: Me wrestle good! Me win rumble!
D: And I’m sure you will, but I don’t think that there’s any way that I can help you.
Tarrasque is about to get another mouthful of chicken wings when he suddenly looks crestfallen.
Tarrasque: Oh…
D: I’m sorry.
Anderson: This would give you something to do. I mean, you haven’t been seen since-
D: Since when?
Anderson: Nevermind. I suppose a lot of money couldn’t change your mind? Perhaps some blow and women?
D is silent for a long time and Marcus worries that he has somehow offended the mysterious man, but he cracks a rare smile.
D: Parsons has rubbed off too much on you.
Anderson: I suppose that he has. So what will get you to change your mind? We tried hypnosis, Tarrasque has tried accessing the Akashic Records. I mean, nothing we’ve tried has worked.
D: What?
Anderson: I said nothing we’ve tried has worked?
D: No, before that. Tarrasque can access the Akashic Records?
Anderson: About his own life I think. I’m not sure how exactly it works. They had wanted to him to gain access to the records to be able to attain at least temporary access to any skill in the world as needed.
D: I see. I don’t think I can help you do this.
Anderson: I understand. We will try something else.
Tarrasque: Me taken by Xian Tsar.
Anderson: See? That’s a clue! D?
Marcus looks around himself and finds that D is gone.
Anderson: Well fuck.
Tarrasque: Him leave.
Anderson: I didn’t notice him leaving!
Tarrasque shrugs, grabbing a handful of chicken from his fresh bowl.
Tarrasque: Him leave. Me win rumble.
Marcus shrugs with a sigh before taking a drink.
Anderson: We should get you ready for the rumble. Maybe after the rumble, I can see what kind of records there are on Xian Tsar’s missions. What twenty years or so ago? How old are you?
Tarrasque: Me not know, but sound right.
Anderson: Well, that’s our next project.
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Post by anthonycaffrey on Feb 2, 2020 2:45:04 GMT -5
Recorded on 02/02/2020
“You okay babe? You seem a little… stressed.”
“I’m fine, really. Please stop asking. You’ve already asked four times.”
“Have some more cake. It’s your birthday and you’re the grumpiest guy in the room.”
There’s a sigh.
“Tell you what. I’m going to go film this real quick, and when I come back, you can cut me another piece.”
The camera captures Anthony Caffrey stepping out onto the rooftop the cameraman was already filming from. He looks back real quick.
“Chocolate. You know me by now. I’m anything but vanilla.”
There’s the sound of a woman laughing as Caffrey shuts a door behind him and takes a few more steps on the rooftop. He lets out a cold breath of February air and looks out to the Philadelphia skyline.
“This view, man. I could stare at this view all night. Even the fuckin’ Comcast building!”
He turns to the cameraman and directs him to film the building directly.
“It’s the biggest one. Up top, you’d never see it from there, but there’s a statue of Ben Franklin up there. It’s a small detail, but it’s important. Philly tradition or superstition if you’re one of those nutjobs -- is that if there’s any building above the Ben Franklin statue on City Hall, none of the major sport teams will win a championship. So some genius said, “Okay, the tallest building will also have that statue”, and there you go.”
The camera turns back to Caffrey.
“I would say it’s the small details that’ll be the difference between me winning the Rumble and getting sent back to AWF flat on my ass, but it’s not. What keeps me a notch above the rest is my ability to distinguish which details are important, and which details are ultimately meaningless. It’s a skill a majority of my opponents don’t have, and that’s been everywhere, not just in SWAT. Take the Fairtex boys for example.”
Caffrey laughs to himself.
“They got soooo offended at me mixing up Tong and Psychotic Goth. So angry, bitterly shouting at me that Tong’s not Goth. My mix-up doesn’t matter, none of those guys could beat me. Now I’m happy I’m in such a good shape that the Fairtexes apparently think I weigh 98 pounds, but can you imagine boldly defending that you’re not in the main event? I would be embarrassed about that fact rather than prideful. Instead they bang on about their belts, as if I couldn’t get my old tag team partner out of the closet and run circles around ‘em.”
He stops for the camera.
“Oh, my partner’s not gay. It’s just a mop. They can pay as much as they want for this company, but I’ll still wipe the floor with ‘em.”
Caffrey makes a quick mopping motion and laughs harder.
“They’re mad at me for Salad Tongs for a guy who eats shit, but I saw how quickly he got eliminated from the first round of the Fired Up tournament. It was basically the same thing. And at the Rumble, if he steps near me, I’ll make him eat shit again. Figuratively, of course.”
He smiles.
“Speaking of people who I’ll make eat shit…”
Caffrey reaches in his pocket for his phone and pulls it out.
“Duke Kosloff, this is for you.”
Caffrey has let his domination of Duke Kosloff play long enough.
“Funny, I saw only us two in that match. I thought you were telling people I’ve only beaten you in multi-man matches. That detail was proven thoroughly wrong at the Classic where I began my time as champion by ending your miserable little reign. But hold on, what’s this? Do I have another example of me beating you in a singles match?”
He laughs as he holds the footage up on his phone up to the camera again.
“Well shit Duke… that’s TWO victories where it’s just you and I, one-on-one. So much for that ‘only could beat you in multi-man matches’ shtick. End of Days and the Classic both prove you wrong. But I don’t think you were wrong accidentally. You’ll claim you were, but I’ve known you long enough to know you have a habit of misrepresenting the truth if you think you can get away with it.”
Caffrey rubs his face, deciding to dumb it down for his opponent. He is not pulling his punches.
“In other words, you’ve always been a fucking liar. I could be like you and repeat 100% of what I’ve said in the past, but when you have actual talent, you always get new ideas. And at the Rumble, if we cross paths, pretty graphics be damned, I’ll introduce you to one of those ideas: a swift elbow to the face called Closing Remarks, and then I’ll throw you to the floor.”
Caffrey spits on his rooftop to let the audience know what he thinks of Kosloff.
“He’ll whine and complain when he sees this, but God, apparently not nearly as much as 110% Syberus. Whew!”
Caffrey scoffs at the mere mention of the name.
“Jesus, if he whined any more, he’d be a liquor store. And people tell me he’s a good guy? They gotta be wrong. A good guy would be telling us how he’s gonna rise above his situation. Yet instead, the man bitches about me wasting time while getting mugged by a bunch of seagulls and using industry terms to try to look tough. Okay, sure.”
Caffrey takes a deliberate pause to let the camera fully capture his illustriously sinister smile full of perfect teeth, happily knowing that somewhere in the world is an annoying prick watching him speak.
“Syberus, those seagulls proved my point. I already told everyone I’m the guy coming in and eating your lunch. There is no silver platter being handed to me, I’m a scavenger taking anything I can find. I am the seagull, and your International championship looks real good to me right now. The difference between you and I is that you bitch about the situation you’re in, and I solve the situations I’m in. You can claim you’re not allowed to win, but if your attitude is an indicator, we both know that you just don’t have the backbone.”
Caffrey crosses his arms, smirking as he thinks about the possibilities.
“My winnings in 2019 bought me this view. A year ago on my birthday I was miserably stuffed into a London hotel, and now I’ve got my own place in the heart of my city. I’ll take some of my winnings from this match and use ‘em for a case for the International Championship after I chuck your ass to the floor. As much as I hate the fans, I pity the ones who’ll have to listen to you bitch about your Rumble loss.”
He chuckles to himself.
“And if you think that’s bad, just imagine Alex Withers! Mr. No Sell. Oof. Poor Alex, do you think I should tell him?”
Caffrey takes a few seconds to think before nodding to himself. He jumps up onto the small wall keeping him from going over the edge and sits on it, taking a more honest approach.
“Alex… I get it. You think you’re better than everyone else. As Timeless pointed out, so does everyone else. But please, you’re not gonna win the Rumble, but please hear my advice so that one day, when you are a world champion in the XHF, you can avoid the same mistakes I made.”
He taps his fingers on the wall rapidly. We can see the anxiety coursing through his body as this apparently is what was bothering him earlier, but Caffrey does his best to keep his mood maintained. He takes a deep breath, letting the cold air roll through into the dark black sky as he speaks.
“First off, stop with this cool guy bullshit. You and Syberus both think peeling back the curtain and using little details like industry terms makes you special. In reality, it makes ya look like a jackass pandering to the Internet nerds who can’t get girlfriends. Congratulations on getting some twenty year old with bacne to buy your t-shirt.”
He mockingly applauds for a few seconds, but his mockery is clearly half-hearted.
“But more importantly, I work for AWF, and you work for SWAT. I say this because if I get punked on my ass and come up short, I have a home. But this? This for you is your home. So when I hear you say shit like that you only care about selling tickets? Boy, that mentality burned AXW out faster than the candles on my birthday cake.”
Caffrey lets out another long sigh into the night.
“I was exactly like you with my Undisputed Championship. I went around telling everyone they weren’t shit, and you know what happened after all that time of me I told people my competition wasn’t worth anything?”
He shakes his head, looking down.
“They believed me.”
He runs his hands through his hair.
“They stopped coming. They stopped watching. I kept telling them no one was worth their money, and sure enough, they stopped spending it. There were a few fans stuck around and they booed me relentlessly. You’ll make that same mistake I did in responding, thinking if the fans are reacting, the ratings don’t matter. And then one day, because you kept telling everyone that nobody else mattered, there’ll be no one around to admire your greatness. Your company will fold, and you’ll find… you’ll find your empire has crumbled to ash while you were laughing from your throne.”
Caffrey’s eyes look like they’ve just seen a ghost. He strongly considers his next words, letting his last thoughts hang out in the night as he contemplates how to get Alex to avoid repeating his downfall.
“I’m an angry asshole. Sure. I even call myself the Chief Asshole. It’s a name I’ve earned through my constant winning and behavior. You see this?”
Caffrey reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out his “Kingpin” trophy from the XHF awards. He sets it down beside him.
“This is my Kingpin trophy. I dominated the voting for this. It means I’m the most hated man in the XHF. Not the AWF, the entire federation. 68% of the fans voted for me. And while I want their votes to be about me spray-painting a dead woman’s gravestone, legally stealing a hotel, and beating all of their favorite wrestlers while verbally abusing them on the microphone… deep down, deep down I can’t help but think part of the reason the fans all hate me is that I took Anonymous Xtreme Wrestling, one of their favorite wrestling companies in the world, and with my giant jackass attitude, ruined it for them.
After staring at the trophy for a few seconds, he quickly shoves it back into his coat pocket. He wipes his face and hops down off the wall, beginning to head for the door back downstairs.
“Fuck it. The cat’s out of the bag. This Rumble? It means a little bit more to me than adding another title to my collection. It’s a little bit more than saving SWAT from its time of turmoil, sure, but please don’t call this a redemption. Call it a umm.. umm…”
Caffrey searches for the right words, but for the first time in a very long time, he’s speechless. He looks out back to the skyline, looking for the right words. He turns back to the camera only when he has something, though the somber tone indicates that these words might not be the right ones.
“Call it a chance to do better. I have the chance to take a company and instead of watching it crumble in the hands of assholes like Soutter and Mai Tai, I have the chance to take this company and reign over it the way I should have done with AXW. Everyone’s talking about fucking skilled they are, but I don’t think any of them are talking about how badly they want this opportunity. Not only do I have the ability to get the job done, but I want it more than anyone in that match put together.”
Caffrey nods to himself. His eyes are moving everywhere as he thinks, but the laser sharp focus is still there: it’s focused on winning the Rumble.
“And that… that I think is the most important detail of them all. When Rumble time rolls around, it doesn’t matter if I’m the first, tenth, or last man to enter that ring. I will be the last man to leave it, and I’ll have earned my shot at Jonnie Valentine or the one that isn’t either of the Fairtex boys.”
Caffrey can’t help himself as he cracks one more joke at the Fairtexes’ expense, his confidence restored. He stands in the doorway, about to head back into his party.
“In the meantime, boys… well, I learned all the details about all you assholes that I possibly could. I would strongly advise you all to stop talking about yourselves for two minutes, go pick up your phone and look me up before the bell rings. After all, you’re going to want to know all the details you can about your next SWAT Heavyweight Champion.”
The final thing we see is Caffrey’s sinister smile as he heads back into his party. The camera fades to black. |
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Post by edwarddubin0604 on Feb 2, 2020 19:59:30 GMT -5
(Team Fairtex passes by a monitor and see Anthony McCaffery's latest promo and shake their heads before giggling as if they found something funny.)
Tong Fairtex: "Did this guy claim he's a Philadelphian but claims to have seen Benjamin Franklin from a distance while enjoying the Comcast Center view."
Phantam Fairtex: "I believe he did brother Tong."
Tong Fairtex: "I thought so. Obviously Mr. Caffeinated must have failed everything from civics, geography and history nd who knows what else in school and his schoolof higher institution. You know why Phantam?"
Phantam Fairtex: "I bet I know what your answer is."
Tong Fairtex: "i'm that obvious."
Phantam Fairtex: "Oh yeah."
Tong Fairtex: "Then any Philly native with a brain which Caffeinated claims to be should know that's Billy Penn in the distance at City Hall unless you mean you have eyes that can see Penn University and saw that bronze figure of good old Ben sitting on a bench."
Phantam Fairtex: "No that's not it."
Tong Fairtex: "Really. Where did that idiot actually see Ben Franklin."
Phantam Fairtex: "It's obvious where he saw Ben Franklin. He saw him in the Market-Frankfort El stop with Abe Lincoln on posters and El platform pillars. Damn he must have X-ray vision to see Ben Franklin from there."
Tong Fairtex: "Seriously, you say we should stop talking about ourselves but look at what you've been doing. Yeah talking about all your titles and this and that to the point nobody cares anymore. You want to talk about Timeless. We'll talk about him Caffeinated. Timeless is real nasty when someone pisses him off and believe me Caffeinated he is and nobody wants to be around when he's in a bad mood."
Phantam Fairtex: "Nobody Caffeinated."
Tong Fairtex: "Then you seem to have something in common with Syberus and you know what that is."
Phantam Fairtex: "Oh I know what you're going to say brother."
Tong Fairtex: "You both ran your promotions into the ground. Yeah Syberus did just that to Hardkore World and believe me he pissed Psychotic Goth off and you don't do that to him and think you'll get away with it. That brings us to you and AXW which you ran into the ground if what we heard was true and obviously it is. I guess you didn't learn how to run a promotion or you would have realized that before you killed the place."
Phantam Fairtex: "Oh and before you say something so stupid you'll ralize you can't take it back. We did watch some of your matches in the AWF and in the XHF Network events and we guess we were impressed. We do that whenever the event is announced or whenever that happens. So don't take us that lightly which by your promo you are."
Tong Fairtex: "You must have meant someone else when you said you'd pull your partner out of a closet. Is that a skeleton or some blow up doll."
Phantam Fairtex: "Maybe a full sized cut out of Ricky Balboa."
Tong Fairtex: "He must mean one of these guys called The Icons."
Phantam Fairtex: "Haven't seen them in either XPW or SWAT or even Hardkore World."
Tong Fairtex: "He must mean the AWF."
Phantam Fairtex: "Hey that's where....."
Tong Fairtex: "Yeah where he came from and where he has some issues with a Philly native named Seth Dillinger who kicked his ass if I recall or some other guy did it. At least that's what I heard from someone there."
Phantam Fairtex: "He'll probably lie about it as if it didn't happen even though it's on record."
Tong Fairtex: "Yeah smile all you want like a villain from a bad low budget movie but when the Royal Rumble starts and finishes Caffeinated. You'll need a whole lot of coffee that will make Starbucks close for lack of caffeine and you'll definitely won't have that smile on your face when you look at the paper's sports section and you'll be called a loser by every sports columnist in Philadelphia."
Phantam Fairtex: "Then there's the sports talk radio hosts talking about your failure and fans will trash you as if they don't do that already. So you'll have to face all that and then some and your self driven egotistical dreams shall come to an end. Oh the shame of it."
Tong Fairtex: "So we'll leave it at that and see if you have the brains to think of something that's not pre recorded or whatever is yanked from your archives of previous promos of years past. Right now we're out of here."
Phantasm Fairtex: "Right behind you bro."
(They leave as the scene slowly fades to black.)
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Post by 𝓓𝓾𝓴𝓮 𝓚𝓸𝓼𝓵𝓸𝓯𝓯 on Feb 2, 2020 21:49:44 GMT -5
LIVE FROM THE LOCKERROOMS
Duke Kosloff sits in his locker room in front of a single cameraman and his brother Luca kosloff. He's prepared for this night for quite some time and now sits ready to step into the ring once again with a whole company and become number one. As Luca helps wrap the wrist and hands of his twin brother Duke, Duke begins to speak into the camera that is now live for the whole arena to see and hear.
"The Russian Nightmare"
Tonight, I step into the ring with Alex Whithers a man I am familiar with, Trent Jones "Mr. Bones" a man I recently took a loss too, and Anthony Caffrey a man I know very well. But see tonight will be a bit different than any other encounter I or they have ever had with each other.
"The Russian Nightmare"
See tonight, I have something I have never had before when I stepped into that ring, I have my brother and not just someone I call brother but blood.
Luca finishes up wrapping of Dukes hands and smiles at the statement from his brother.
"The Russian Nightmare"
In the past, I have had family who claimed to be there for me but was there for themselves and we all know how that turned out. Luca in the short time we have been reunited has shown me more loyalty than those I know my whole life. Allow me to tell you a brief story...
The Kosloff brothers both sitting side by side now stare into the camera as Duke begins to tell his tale.
"The Russian Nightmare"
The woods were dark, and the fog was thick around the heels as a lonely Musad officer strode among the trees sewn deep into the earth. Not too many of the soldiers not from the underworld dared to use the Swampy Woods as a navigation route, but those who did found its twist and turns to their advantage. That is if they knew their way about it unfortunately, most did not.
This particular lone wolf known to everyone in the Eastern hemisphere as "The Icepick" was one of the many who, not unlike even those with navigation, found himself staring at the same jumble of trees no matter which way his feet took him. Without carrying a gun or any other military weapon the woods neighboring the swamps acted as not just a maze but a maze harboring many teeth, sharp like daggers ready to plunge themselves into the backs of the ones who journey through the mouth of the beast. For that is what those who live near call the thick jumble of trees, "The Beast".
Luca begins to breathe heavily as he remembers the journey.
"The Russian Nightmare"
Its tall oaks blocked out the little sunlight that was left in the late afternoon, and inside the belly of this beast loomed creatures so foul that they are not even hunted for the meat on their backs. The sweet scent of the swamp flowers is folly to enjoy, for as it draws you near so do the plants once beautiful and inviting gape open with mouths and fangs.
Mud and dirt-caked thick on the bottoms of the Musad officer's boots, and in turn, softened the sounds of his footsteps on the forest floor. His breath could be seen flowing white from his mouth as he breathed deep, uncertain of his getaway decision. Close to his heart in his right hand, a small package was held, but not without the want of replacing it with a sword. The foul whispers of misleading calm called to him from the branches of far off trees.
Regret flew threw him not unlike an arrow accompanied by a poisoned tip of death. This light little morsel of shine stolen from the Russian embassy was not worth fight from the guard, and it was most defiantly not worth being torn to pieces by some unrecorded terror among the trees of the unknown swampy woods.
Duke reaches over into his locker grabbing what appears to be a small hand-carved wooden box with the Kosloff family crest on it.
"The Russian Nightmare"
His grip on the package grew tighter as his feet strode on through the forest; their city nature causing them to stumble among the roots and fallen branches even with his military training. A light shone brightly through the upcoming trial hope once again flickered in his chest, and fear gave away to excitement. Could it be that he staid close to the edge of the wood after all?
The trees soon opened up to the late afternoon air as the Musad Officer's foot caught the last root of the outskirt trees, and he fell to his hands; the stolen package flung from his grip landed a few feet away. Some would say that it was the wood's way of attempting to catch the fly that got away from the web. He managed to get back to his feet and deliver that package that meant so much to both his country and the Russian Embassy but most of all the Kosloff family.
Duke stands up as he walks around the wooden bench stepping behind his brother Luca, placing his hands on the shoulders of his twin he stares into the camera.
"The Russian Nightmare"
You see even though my brother was raised and trained to be a Musad assassin, officer whatever you want to call it, his Kosloff blood, the blood that runs through him lead him to do what was best for me and the family. That package could have done a lot of damage to our family to my empire and my dynasty.
"The Russian Nightmare"
So now, I have someone looking out for me who I can trust, I have someone to call real family. So I will help SWAT out with a simple bit of advice. Watch out who you deal with, watch out for your own because there are snakes slithering around waiting to take from you and slither back to their holes within the network.
Duke walks around in front of the camera blocking everything else as he continues to speak.
"The Russian Nightmare"
I may not be considered a team player, or team SWAT, hell I really don't care about most people I step into the ring with but if these past few months being around my brother has taught me anything. You need to believe in something, trust someone and have a mission in life. So tonight, my mission is to eliminate as many people as I can, become number one then take the SWAT World championship then the XHF Global championship, but unlike others, after I win it I'm not running off to another company with it.
"The Russian Nightmare"
Tonight everyone who steps into that SWAT ring into this Rumble match will all know what "FEEL THE BURN" truly means as they learn to "Believe in the Nightmare"!!!
Duke reaches up turning the camera off...
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Post by King Syberus on Feb 3, 2020 20:49:03 GMT -5
[ The camera slowly fades into a crackling fireplace as Vivaldi's “Four Seasons” plays in the background. Next to the fireplace sat in a red studded leather high back chair is 110% Syberus, in a monogrammed silk robe (“110% S”) holding a glass of port and thumbing through Homer's Iliad. After a few moments, Syberus “notices” the camera and slaps the book shut. ]
110% Syberus: Oh, hello there! And welcome to a special Royal Rumble fireside chat.
With me here today are just some of the exciting talent vying to take not only my International title (he gestures to a pedastal on which the belt resides nearby) but also go for double gold and take on my friend, mentor, stablemate, and man who will never betray me and who I will never betray, guaranteed, Jonnie Valentine.
Here to chew the fat, and discuss this unfathomable opportunity, are the likes of Anthony Caffrey, Duke Kosloff and Eddie big face, I mean big fat Eddie, I mean Eddie D. And Trent Jones-
[ Syberus looks off camera. ]
110% Syberus: Really we have to do Trent Jones?
[ Momentary pause. ]
110% Syberus: Jesus. Alright, well joining me first of all is a man who needs no introduction!
...
In his own mind that is, we on the other hand have no fucking idea. Please welcome to the fireside a guy who beat a bunch of people that aren't us in a place that's not here (Syberus slaps his cheek in mock disbelief)– Anthony Caffrey!
Anthony Caffrey: 110% Syberus. Whew!
[ At this point it should be explained that the “guests” on Syberus's fireside chat are just soundbites shamelessly ripped from opponent's promos. ]
110% Syberus: Haha, I know right? It must be strange for you to be in the presence of someone who's actually done everything you're bragging about but against good wrestlers in places that matter. I mean here you are showing clips of you beating Duke Kosloff. Like that's an achievement, have you ever sat through one of his promos? Yikes.
Anthony Caffrey: And if you think that’s bad, just imagine Alex Withers!
110% Syberus: Boy you said it! No wait, who the fuck is Alex Withers? You know what, don't explain. I'm guessing it's someone you'll need to show a desperate youtube clip of you pinning in your unbeaten year of pounding on hobos in Dumpster Fire Wrestling just to prove that it happened.
[ Caffrey reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out his “Kingpin” trophy from the XHF awards. He sets it down beside him. ]
Anthony Caffrey: This is my Kingpin trophy. I dominated the voting for this. It means I’m the most hated man in the XHF.
110% Syberus: Ahhhh look at that lil' thing! Fits right in your pocket there. I'll have to admit that's much more convenient than my 2006 Hardkore World Wrestler of the Year award.
[ He points a thumb over his shoulder and the camera pans to an obscenely large trophy that's in a hugely inconvenient place in the doorway, we catch Jonnie Valentine awkwardly having to slide past it trying not to spill his plate of hors d'oeuvres. ]
Anthony Caffrey: 68% of the fans voted for me.
[ Syberus puts a monocle in his eye just so he can immediately drop it into his drink in shock. ]
110% Syberus: Whoa whoa whoa hold the phone. You're honestly going to sit there as a guest at my fireside, at the fireside of 110% Syberus, the highest percenter in SWAT, and have the audacity to take pride in such a low percentage?!
68%?! Amateur. Fucking amateur. When I was in my pomp in Hardkore World, there was no other 32%. There was only the great Syberus. Different nickname. Different time. But my dominance in that period was such that the locker room went into meltdown. My friends swerved me. My managers turned their backs. The crowds would hail with boos. I had people claim they'd rather not have world title shots than wrestle me. People came back from retirement. Part timers suddenly turned up. All to claw at my heels as I stood atop the wrestling industry completely unparalleled in greatness.
You?
Having a punchable face and an annoying smirk which you bust out every two seconds does not make you public enemy number 1. Winning a meaningless vote from a crowd of your circle jerk buddies does not make you a significant figure. Going undefeated against the small fish in the small pond you've never left isn't anything even worth raising an eyebrow for when you're 110% Syberus.
Don't you get it Anthony?
Do you understand how many clips I could show you?
Do you understand how many Duke Kosloffs I've pinned?
Can you fathom how many years and how many championships and how many wrestling promotions are woven in the fabric of my career??
Anthony Caffrey: ...but I want it more than anyone in that match put together.
110% Syberus: Oh you do, do you? And this is based on what, recent polls? How the fuck do you know how much I want to win this match? Or Tong Fairtex or Frostbite who I assume are in it as well but am too lazy to check right now.
Saying you want it more is old hat. It can't be proven. And in any rate I've buried a whole lot of people in my time who wanted to beat me more than I wanted to beat them so really it's inconsequential.
Your problem Anthony is that you are simply not good enough to succeed here in SWAT. You have been judged already in your short time in this promotion, from which I've heard from you twice, and I can already tell that you're painfully limited ass is never going to get any better.
Unfortunately for you, you've stepped into the domain of the Society of the New Breed. The single most bona fide mark of excellence this sport has ever seen. We're better than you. And also, we're better than you. I'm not saying if you stick around you won't get a victory over an Alex Turner or a Psychotic Goth here and there. But you son aren't in the same league as 110% Syberus and Jonnie Valentine. We are a hallmark of a class completely apart from your own.
Now, if you want to get BETTER? You're in the right place to learn. But if you're just gonna spout your basic ass lines about your basic ass achievements, while having the narration perfectly describe each fucking muscle twitch in your awful face and ponder the hidden meanings therein – you have my invitation to slither back to wherever it is you're cosiest with the fed head so that he or she can book you on the title a few more times. What the hell, easier than actually being good at this shit right?
Now, who's next?
Duke Kosloff: I am that star the fell from the skies, I am the nightmare that was released upon the world, I am the reason why the churches fear the wrath of God.
110% Syberus: Uh... why, hello there Mr. all that stuff you said. Thanks for joining us on the fireside chat. Quite the backstory with one or two other members of this Royal Rumble haven't you?
Duke Kosloff: Tonight I make my mark on SWAT, tonight I force the powers to be to recognize the true threat, tonight I show the world why I am monster among them, and why I am the one to beat.
110% Syberus: You've got moxy, kid. I like that about you. Oh wait, no, the other thing – nothing that you say makes sense and I hate you. I feel for the poor bastard who actually has to watch your shit. I wonder how Soutter felt after hearing you open your mouth for the first time.
Duke Kosloff: Regret flew threw him not unlike an arrow accompanied by a poisoned tip of death.
110% Syberus: I'll say, but, you're here now, somehow claiming a pay check and in the same ring as me at the Royal Rumble.
Duke Kosloff: I will help SWAT out with a simple bit of advice. Watch out who you deal with, watch out for your own because there are snakes slithering around waiting to take from you and slither back to their holes within the network.
110% Syberus: Get that vibe from Anthony don't you? It seems you and him go way back. Tell me – in whatever the hell fed you're from is he as insufferable as he's been here in two promos or does it get worse?
Duke Kosloff: Allow me to tell you a brief story...
110% Syberus: I think it's already clear that you don't have the capacity to do that. I mean why Duke? WHY? I thought guys like you went out of style in the late noughties alongside leather bracelets and the pick up artist movement. Any idea how many chumps I had to sit watching recite vampire fan fiction instead of cutting a wrestling promo back then? Don't make us go back there, Duke, I beg of you. This is SWAT. Brush up for GTFO.
110% Syberus: That's enough from you. Let's hear from my main man, big giant face Eddie. Eddie, my man, I have to say I'm disappointed in you.
Eddie D: I can’t help it
110% Syberus: I know, I know... you're a special boy and your feelings were hurt and now you're shying away from the world because of what I said. I'd almost feel bad, but I'm unable empathise with life forms that I don't consider to be “real” you know what I mean?
Eddie D: Exactly.
110% Syberus: Eddie, you literally based your heat off of saying “this place I'm at is bad”. Any idea how low we're setting the bar here?
What do we make of you Eddie? You beautiful idiot.
You clueless, clueless man.
You boiled egg of a human being.
Eddie D: There’s no reason why Eddie D couldn’t, shouldn’t, wouldn’t win The Rumble tonight and take this place by storm.
110% Syberus: That's right Eddie. That's my boy. That's my special little champ. You can do absolutely anything that you set your mind to – and I know that's not a lot considering your mind consists of a few marbles rattling around an empty coconut husk, but you can do it all the same.
Don't let anybody tell you you can't.
And don't let anybody tell you there's too much of your big stupid face everywhere, on every screen in existence.
Don't punk out. Own it! Own your giant stupid face! It's probably going to be in the main event next time out because royal rumbles are complete lotteries so own it!
Eddie D: SWAT?! Every sorry Rumble entrant!?
BRING……. IT……. ON!
110% Syberus: That's me! I'm one of the sorry rumble entrants – sorry that I have to be in proximity to your stench of failure. But even more sorry that I have to now welcome Trent Jones to fireside. Come on down, Trent!
…
Just kidding, no one likes you Trent.
[ Fade. ]
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mosler
Special GUNS Acess
Mosler's not here man.
Posts: 2,345
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Post by mosler on Feb 4, 2020 3:24:29 GMT -5
"Congratz on ze big win, Buster. I know zere are a lot of people here who were really impressed. Reminded zem of your past glory, and zey're all expecting big things from you in ze days ahead. I imagine you're excited to enter zis new chapter too. Zat is why I wanted to break ze news to you zis way, instead of in a dirt sheet. Remember our stomach pump death match? It seems like only yesterday, but we've both come so far since zen. Me as ze commissioner of SWAT, and you as ze former rival I am terminating right now. You always seemed happier on food stamps, Buster. I really hope zis indignity is ze last push you need to make a drastic decision we can almost all live with.
Good luck with your future endeavours... in hell.
Affectionately yours,
Zoran Sainovic
...full stop. Can your singing telegram service handle zat? Don't worry about ze expense, I'll be charging it to SWAT HR. Location? Oh, he's a transient. I flush most of his royalties down a toilet, and assume he gets zem. For delivery? Can you send someone to ze arena tonight? I'd like to have zem waiting with security at ze gate when he arrives to compete in ze royal rumble, only to be denied entry to ze building. Yes. Perfect. I will leave her name at ze door."
[Sitting back in a leather chair, Zoran Sainovic hangs up the phone. That's old business taken care of. збогом Buster Friendly. His dressing room has been set-up as a makeshift office. It might have been disguised better half an hour ago. Sadly between staging it and this interview, Zoran discovered the rules in place with his recently won championship. A defence every thirty days? No problem. He's the booker. All the jobbers hate him, which sets up easy wins until XHF's own rumble in April. Sadly, the nature of long SWAT nights means he has no choice but to put the title on the line tonight. Title and commissioner position? Its little wonder there are fist marks on the walls. Not wanting the SWAT viewers to glimpse evidence of him losing his cool, Zoran decides to stroll.]
Zoran Sainovc <rising>: Don't you hate it when Royal Rumbles are filled to ze brim with fodder? Wastes of space who are only zere to act as a consolation body count for ze guy who probably should have won, but isn't? Like ze smart money being on Syberus, only for Anthony Cafferty to steal his zunder to ze point where I had to bow to Timeless' hardcore title wishes? Costing him ze hardcore title is just giving Syberus an excuse for why he's being dumped out of ze ring by an outsider. I'm not just doing it because stealing ze international title moniker is an insult to all us REAL international title holders zat wouldn't be caught dead with ze hardcore strap. So Syberus is getting F'd in ze A at least 10% more zan his norm. ...But at least he'll have thrown out 8 people first to show how strong he is. <shakes head> Will he? I'm cutting the fat. All 10% of it.
Why are zere only 25 wrestlers in zis rumble instead of 30? I chopped ze budget down to size, zat's why. No need to bring 2018 runner-up Beelzebozo into zis match. Drunk would just lean against ze ropes, trying not to shit himself - and much like Alex Withers ANZAC efforts, fail spectacularly. I also cut DRAMA for making zat liver fucking chronic self-lover look decent. I zink we can all agree, it was important to cut Buster loose lest CSK think ze merits of two years were still relevant. Ze last time we saw CSK he was in ACW, right? I just axed ze ACW champion. Returning legend? I know ze friends of Hardkore have lowered ze standard of returning legend to ze point where Tum would get a standing ovation, but zat doesn't make it right. What have you done lately, Kennedy?
Zis will also be Hell's Bouncers last appearance in a SWAT ring. Our current world title only features five names - why cut one? Because I don't want Suzi Spitz to EVER forget she is ze shortest reigning champion and an embarrassment to ze title. Every time she kisses up to Valentine, I want her to remember, zat her CLEAR inferiority to him set ze Amazons division back four years. Do you think we'll ever see another female champion, Suzi? After your stellar example?
....I'm also sick of being identified as Russian instead of Serbian. Perhaps I'll fire Duke Kosloff as well.
Can you imagine a world where I'm not ze commissioner?
Scary, right?
[Owing to the board erasing the next six pages, and the frustration that comes with that, I'm going to say Zoran walks through the exit, pursued by bear.]
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SWAT Team
.::XHF Superstar::.
The Promise Land
Posts: 2,416
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Post by SWAT Team on Feb 4, 2020 3:34:15 GMT -5
Jeremy Tucker: Well fans up next we have a contest for the future of SWAT. Radu Matei who hasn’t lost a one on one singles match since joining SWAT, taking on his archrival, Zoran Sainovic, for the commissioner title of our company.
Andrew Fulton: And if it weren’t complicated enough, Zoran’s recently acquired X*Crown will also be on the line. The most prestiges championship in the XHF! Zoran won it to improve his employment chances, now he could lose the gold and his job in one night! It is safe to say that God really has it out for Zoran.
Jeremy Tucker: EVERYONE has it out for Zoran. He’s scum.
Andrew Fulton: Well I still think he can win.
Jeremy Tucker: How do you figure that?
Andrew Fulton: Politics.
Jeremy Tucker: Meaning?
Andrew Fulton: What?
Jeremy Tucker: You have no idea what you’re talking about. Lets send it over to Frank Salazar with introductions…
[The camera cuts to the ring where Frank Salazar is decked out in a tux. Could he be Tuxedo Mask? No, he works.]
Frank Salazar: Ladies and gentlemen… the following contest –
MATEI SAINOVIC ROUND TWO
- has a one hour time limit…
It is for the commissioner role in SWAT...
AND
The XHF X*CROWN CHAMPIONSHIP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*GIGA POP*
Andrew Fulton: The first time these two locked up it was the single most brutal cage match in SWAT history!
Jeremy Tucker: And Zoran wasn’t even in the damn cage!
Frank Salazar: Entering first... the challenger!
[The haunting theme from Cannibal Holocaust comes across the PA to a hero’s welcome.]
Frank Salazar: He stands at 6’2”, and weighs in at 234lbs, coming to us from Sibiu, Romania… please put your hands together for…
The Five Time SWAT Dixie Heavyweight champion…
The former SWAT World Heavyweight Champion
The 2019 Helloween Cup winner
And 2019 Wrestler of the Year...
Your Sacrifical Idol
RADUUUUUUUU MATEIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[Pushing through the curtains is the man who died for SWAT. Now resembling a walking corpse, but with all the heavy medical gauze of Darkman, Radu Matei has his eyes fixed on the ring. Having broken his left arm against Cobryn, The Sacrificial Idol extends his right to high five the rabid fans. Radu tries to smile at them, but its clear he has revenge on the brain.]
Frank Salazar: And his opponent...
[The After the Fire version of “Der Kommissar” pumps over the PA to a pop from the crowd, who like the song, but then realize who its for and start pelting the entranceway with garbage.]
Frank Salazar: Standing at 6’1” and weighing in at 242lbs, he hails from Belgrade, Serbia.
A former SWAT International champion…
Former SWAT Ultimate Champion...
The 2018 Ken Morlock Memorial Cup winner
And CURRENT XHF X*Crown Champion...
You commissioner...
*HUGE JEERS*
ZORAAAAN SAINOVIIIIIIIIICCC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[No sooner has Zoran Sainovic pushed the backstage curtains aside than a an with a good arm catches him on the chest with a tomato. Security activity increases, as more litter floods the stage. Opening his suit coat, Sainovic reveals the X*Crown. With a cocky swagger, the SWAT commissioner locks eyes on Radu and slows down his pace.]
Jeremy Tucker: These two staring daggers at each other.
Andrew Fulton: To be followed by actual daggers. This is going to be a classic! …If you like your classics being all about guys getting stabbed and dropped on their heads.
Jeremy Tucker: Both men in the ring. Sanovic handing referee Kip Katt the XHF X*Crown... I honestly can’t think of a better opponent for this first SWAT defence than our longest reigning world champion.
Andrew Fulton: Zoran is only putting the belt up because he’ll be stripped of it otherwise, but don’t think he’s happy about it. He could lose his commissioner job and the X*Crown, in one foul swoop!
Jeremy Tucker: If his SWAT world title run was any indication, Radu Matei would make a great X*Crown champion. I have a hard time thinking of him behind a desk, but as the commissioner he’d certainly have the companies interests at heart a lot more than our previous management figures.
Andrew Fulton: A hard time imagining him behind a desk? Given the state of Radu’s body, I have a hard time seeing him anywhere else. He can claim he’s altruistically saving SWAT from Sainovic, but the truth is after his title run, Radu’s ring days are over.
Jeremy Tucker: Kapp giving the title to a ringside atten- wait, Sainovic with a mic.
Zoran Sainovic: OH yeah, Rad... I know you had an arrangement with Pesci, where he’d continue to cover Oxanna’s medical costs as long as you were an active wrestler. That was nice of him. We don’t have that arrangement, Rad. So Oxanna will no longer be covered by SWAT’s insurance.
Jeremy Tucker: I don’t think-
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*Heavy jeers immediately turn into a massive pop!*
Jeremy Tucker: RADU MATEI EXPLODING BEFORE THE BELL! RAMMING INTO ZORAN SAINOVIC WITH A CLOSELINE THAT SENDS THEM BOTH OVER THE TOP ROPE!!!
DING! DING!! DING!!!!
Andrew Fulton: A preview of the rumble, as both men go spilling over the top to the floor! Sainovic caught his shoulder hard on the apron on his way out, but both men hitting the ground hard! Matei on top, hammering away with his good hand.
Jeremy Tucker: One arm still in a cast, but Matei just unloading on the commissioner! Two months ago, Sainovic put Matei’s bodyguard Oxanna Willie in intensive care, and I have to question Zoran goading Matei about it. Kit Kapp starting a ten count. One.
Andrew Fulton: Goad away! The last time these two had a match Zoran did more physical damage to Matei than he had ever experienced before! Two!
Jeremy Tucker: In a shark cage being dragged by a van! Zoran didn’t physically put his hands on Matei! Three! The way I remember it, that match had one move, and Radu almost broke Zoran’s leg. Four!
Andrew Fulton: Radu with a fistful of hair, tossing Zoran under the bottom rope to break the count!
Jeremy Tucker: Zoran trying to crawl away to regroup, but Radu reaching under the rope, grabs a leg and drags him back out! SWINGING HIM HARD TOWARDS-
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*CRASH*
Jeremy Tucker: Radu swinging Zoran by the leg, just sent him CRASHING through our announce table! One! Zoran looks out, and Radu stomping on him – grinding his face into pieces of broken wood! Two!
Andrew Fulton: Zoran with a big shard of table stabbing away at Radu’s leg. Ugh, the blood shot all over my shirt. This is WAY too close! Three!
Jeremy Tucker: Matei’s leg almost buckles as Sainovic grinds away, but the Sacrificial Idol powers through… grabbing a cable from one of our monitors and choking the commissioner out. Four!
Andrew Fulton: Yanking back on that cable, and eventually Sainovic has to leave the wood in Radu’s leg so he can focus on gasping for air. Five!
Jeremy Tucker: Matei dragging Sainovic up with the cables, and still wrapped around the champion’s neck charges towards the French announce table! BULLDOG!!!
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Jeremy Tucker: The table didn’t break! Six!
Andrew Fulton: Matei climbing up on the apron. Katt trying to get him to take it back in the ring, but this is no longer about wrestling. This is pain. Seven! Matei diving off the apron onto Zoran – YES!!!
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*CRASH*
Jeremy Tucker: ZORAN ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY, AND MATEI GOES SMASHING THROUGH THE FRENCH ANNOUNCE POSITION WITH A FLYING LEGDROP!!! IF HE WAS BLEEDING FROM THAT SLAB OF WOOD IN HIS LEG BEFORE, HE’S GOT A HELL OF A LOT MORE IN THERE NOW!
Andrew Fulton: Eight! Matei is down, and Zoran – already bleeding heavily – crawling back to the ring. He wants to end this in the ring – anything else will just result in him having to defend his strap and position again. …not that he wouldn’t be happy to get a count out victory.
Jeremy Tucker: Zoran sliding under the rope to beat the count. Nine! Not like this.
Andrew Fulton: Hey, if you want to be commissioner you have to use the rules to your advantage!
Jeremy Tucker: Radu still in that table with no chance of – wait – yanking the cable still tied around the champion, pulls Zoran back to the outside! Count reset.
Andrew Fulton: Using that cable, Matei tries to pull Sainovic into a uranage but the commissioner puts the breaks on. Kicks Matei’s wounded leg. Kneelift. Swinging neckbreaker into the Spanish announce table. One. It doesn’t break!
Jeremy Tucker: Sainovic climbing up on the table to deliver a piledriver into the table...
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Jeremy Tucker: NO! Matei with a BIG backdrop sends Sainovic crashing spine first into the steel guardrail! Zoran in agony as he tries to pull himself off it! Matei leaping off the announce table and KNOCKING Sainovic back to ringside with a spinning elbow!
Andrew Fulton: Both men rolling around on the floor, Matei peppering away at Sainovic with clubbing rights!
Jeremy Tucker: Sainovic wearing a crimson mask, but with the presence of mind to smack Matei’s left cast! Gain. Sainovic fighting through those rapid fire blows to centre in on that broken arm of the Helloween Cup winner.
Andrew Fulton: Radu trying to shrug it off, but Sainovic pulling him into a cross armbreaker! Twisting that damaged left arm, trying to shatter the cast. Remind me not to get on Zoran’s bad side!
Jeremy Tucker: If the champion doesn’t watch it he’s going to get counted out.
Andrew Fulton: I somehow don’t think that Zoran will mind. NO!!!
#THUD#
Jeremy Tucker: Radu Matei BREAKS the hold, CHOKESLAMMING Sainovic into the steel steps! That’ll break the hold. Matei not letting up, using his good arm to drag Sainovic up – and whips him into the opposite steel steps!
#THUD#
Andrew Fulton: Dislodged the damn things!
Jeremy Tucker: Lot of force behind that! These two have been building sheer hatred for half a year, and its all coming to a head tonight! Even if they have to drench the ring in bad blood!
Andrew Fulton: Radu now turning to enter the ring, but Zoran from behind with a low blow. Another low blow, pulling Matei from that bottom rope and SHOTEI! Damn you could hear that! Matei’s jaw moved a good five inches before the rest of his head followed. SHOTEI! Another one rocks him back into the guardrail, Zoran setting him up…
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Jeremy Tucker: REVOLVER into the Japanese announcer’s table!
Andrew Fulton: Ringside looks like a demilitarized zone! They are really going to town on our announce positions. How many languages is SWAT broadcast in?
Jeremy Tucker: 27.
Andrew Fulton: Christ. Someone is going o die.
Jeremy Tucker: Sainovic using his body to block Kip Katt’s view, and producing a scalpel from his boot just going to town on Matei’s back. …Slashing through Matei’s clothing, and – is he carving a message? That’s sick!
Andrew Fulton: ...Force Awakens Best Star Wars Ever!
Jeremy Tucker: That is NOT the kind of statement you want permanent carved into your back! I don’t care how could the commissioner’s penmanship is, that’s inhuman!
Andrew Fulton: By the time it heals over, it might say something very different.
Jeremy Tucker: Mutilation? This has gone too far! I don’t care what the stakes are, Kip Katt has to step in. Radu Matei looks like a ghost from lack of blood...
*POP*
Jeremy Tucker: ...But somehow finding the strength to pull Sainovic face first into the guardrail! ZORAN’S NOSE GUSHING LIKE A FAUCET! Matei again mounting the commissioner and reigning down blows!
Andrew Fulton: Zoran wrapping the good arm in another submission hold, leaving Ragu with only that broken wing. Ha! Good luck with that you – COME ON!
#MAD POP#
Jeremy Tucker: Radu with his casted left arm, going to town! Smashing it into Zoran’s broken nose again… and again… and again… and again… is that dust?
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Jeremy Tucker: RADU MATEI SHATTERED HIS CAST TO PIECES AGAINST ZORAN SAINOVIC’S FACE!!!!!!!!
Andrew Fulton: What an animal!
DING!! DING!!! DING!!!!!!!!
Jeremy Tucker: Huh, what?
*Massive boos!*
Andrew Fulton: Oh, come on!
Frank Salazar: The referee has ruled this contest a DOUBLE COUNTOUT! Without a clear victory, Zoran Sainovic remains the SWAT Commissioner and the X*CROWN CHAMPION!!!
*Biggest boos of the damned night*
Jeremy Tucker: It can’t end like this! We need a winner! Restart the match! Make it falls count anywhere!
Andrew Fulton: The commissioner is calling the shots, and he’s not going to go for it.
Jeremy Tucker: I was wondering why these two weren’t closing, and it’s a frustrating non-finish! Despite being on top of the world - Sainovic is doing the absolute worst thing for SWAT, for the XHF, and for the belt. What a horrible person.
Andrew Fulton: That’s called ring smarts! Barely able to stand, Sainovic with a blood stained smile at the announcement... and staggering over to the timekeeper’s table to collect his X*CROWN-
*HUGE POP*
Jeremy Tucker: MATEI FROM BEHIND WITH A RELEASE OVERHEAD BELLY-TO-BELLY SUPLEX SENDS ZORAN OVER THE GUARDRAIL INTO THE AUDIENCE!
Andrew Fulton: What a poor sport.
Jeremy Tucker: Poor nothing, they’ve gone too far to stop now! Radu using the guardrail to launch himself into Sainovic with a slingshot shoulder block! RADU AND ZORAN BRAWLING IN THE CROWD!!!
Andrew Fulton: Secruity trying to hold the fans back, but they’re not having much luck. Ragu and Zoran trading shot for shot!
Jeremy Tucker: Rapid fire exchange as the two make their way up the stairs. Zoran – ZORAN PULLING OUT HIS CHAINED SICKLES!
Andrew Fulton: Well Matei has a steel chair-
Jeremy Tucker: To defend himself, and there is NO comparison! We saw Zoran pull that God of War crap at New Year’s Nightmare, it almost got Pesci the win and would have permanently ended Radu’s career! Now he’s swinging those blades in the crowd – he doesn’t care about lawsuits!
Andrew Fulton: Zoran wants his lump of flesh. Radu Matei dominated SWAT in 2019 by being the toughest, scariest bastard on the roster. Only one man stood up to the Sacrifical Idol, and that man is proving he’ll be the toughest, scariest, craziest monster in 2020!
Jeremy Tucker: Those sickles catching audience members as often as they’re hitting our former world champ.
Andrew Fulton: Yeah, that’ll keep the crowd from trying to pat him on the back. Hell, you have half the audience around them fleeing and the other half trying to get better seats!
Jeremy Tucker: Its pandemonium in the audience! Our videographer is having a hard time keeping up with this wild brawl! We need more security out there!
Andrew Fulton: The momentum of the blows sending the two men further back. Sainovic stabbing a sickle into Matei’s back – only to get speared through an exit!
Jeremy Tucker: The two heading towards the concession area – can we get some camers back there?! Hello?
Andrew Fulton: HERE WE GO! We have a videographer back there catching up and – Matei tossing a hotdog cart at Sainovic only to take out the camera!
Jeremy Tucker: Signal lost. Well, hopefully we can catch back up with them. What an absolute blood bath.
Andrew Fulton: They are going to be hard to miss.
Jeremy Tucker: Certainly more questions than answers. Hopefully we catch up with Sainovic again to address this situation. As paramedics check on the wounded in the audience, we’re going to send it to the back.
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Post by Lucky Linda on Feb 4, 2020 4:17:55 GMT -5
”Linda!” hails Glamorous Glenda. “Great win over Suzi”
Linda is opening a bottle of water and takes a drink in the back, she also has a towel over the back of her neck and hanging over each shoulder. “Thanks Glenda. She is quite the opponent, I have beaten her before, and she has beaten me before, I m sure we will both each other again after tonight, but Tonight Glenda! Tonight was MY night!”
“It sure was, and what a great match it was” Glenda pumps her up “how are you feeling after it?”
“I feel fine” answers Linda. “I had her right where i wanted her from the beginning of the match to the end. “
“That was some counter to the oral victory.”
“I have been doing my homework. What a disgusting name for a move.” Linda shakes her head in disgust. “She really is trash, going for the filthy demographic to cheer her on, and no, i’m no prude, i guess some women will do anything for attention, they make it ten times harder for us ladies to thrive in this world, but like the old saying goes, life wasn’t meant to be easy. She sure is though.” Linda holds her hand over her mouth in pretend i shouldn’t have said that.
“Ouch. You go Linda.” Cheers on Glenda.
“Oh, go i will! Right now over Tabitha and into the final!” Linda smiles.
“Tabitha?” She isn’t in this tourney, your next scheduled for Melody Doll.
“You don’t say?” Linda mocks. “I know who i am scheduled to meet next. Tabitha. Melody. Same. Same. Seems these tarts today think to make it if you aren’t an easy bimbo, you must be a batshit crazy nutjob abused and confused.” Linda shakes her head. “All looking for the easy way to the top. Melody. There is no easy way. I have seen and beaten much crazier than you honey. “
“... and do you want to know how i have beaten them all? I will tell you how” Linda continues “Two words. Hard work. Week in, week out! Every match! Every show! Not breezing in and out like the Spitz’ and Freya’s and flashing some skin and expecting the world to be handed to me on a platter. No! HARD WORK! Busting my ass! The harder i work, the luckier i get. Funny that. Isn’t it?” asks Linda, taking a swig of her bottle.
“Luck can only take you so far.” Glenda chimes in.
“In this world, you make your own luck Glenda.” Linda glares into the camera. “So Melody. You need to ask yourself a question. Do you feel lucky? Well? Do Ya? PUNK?” Linda winks confidently to the camera as we fade.
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Post by Phoenix Roost on Feb 4, 2020 19:00:47 GMT -5
[The scene opens on Seiji Shimuzu playing a video game far before his time.
Well, not SUPER before his time. It came out when he was three, and while it is not a game I’d let most three-year-olds play, but he was a three-year-old in one of Japan’s most populous cities. I can’t imagine there was a way he could get away without absorbing at least some of the hype for Final Fantasy VII, even if just by osmosis.
It’s a part of the game not many people would write home about. In a ruined forest area called Gongaga, you encounter a dude with spiky red hair and an electrified baton and a large bald black man with iconic shades who fights buster sword-wielding super soldiers with his bare fucking hands.
That is as cool as it sounds. A shame his name was passed on to such a useless filler character.
In the middle of this boss fight, the door slams open and the camera swings around to show Albion in the doorway, her face the picture of furious distress. Seiji whirls around in his rolling desk chair, eyes wide.]
Seiji: Are you....alright...?
[She is very clearly not alright. Her eyes are as wide as they go, and they seem a bit brighter than normal...? Albion’s response to the question is to step though the room and slam the door the other way. It could just be some effects in post, but the door hits the frame so hard the door seems to bow, but it stays intact.]
Albion: I couldn’t find her.
Seiji: I’m.....sorry...?
[Albion growls as she stalks into the room, throwing herself down onto a loveseat. Seiji has paused the game to turn to face her, and he seems to notice her eyes for the first time, which makes him furrow his own brow.]
Albion: Am I the only one trying to pay attention to things other than myself? Do you watch the shows you are on at all?
Seiji: I mean...not usually? XWA’s shows were pretty straightforward, if sometimes disjointed, and if SWAT is anything like the places Kaji used to wrestle for, most of the segments that aren’t wrestling will be unfathomably dull. Lots of dick waving and pissing contests, or else the same tired love triangle bullshit year after year.
[Albion glares a little harder, and her eyes seem to brighten a bit more. Seiji raises an eyebrow this time, and he seems like he’s about to address it when Albion beats him to the punch.]
Albion: She killed someone, Seiji. Or pretended to, or nearly did, and I don’t know which is the worst truth. I went off to find the cameraman who was there when she came around the corner, but he couldn’t remember where that was, and if I was in the spot where it happened, she had already cleared out, or been cleared out, before I got there.
[Seiji waits for a moment as Albion seethes on the loveseat. Her eyes continue to glow a bright blue, brighter than they should be, as her chest heaves from both the exertions of her first match of the night and the frantic search for a victim. After what could be a few seconds or several hours, Seiji cautiously opens his mouth to speak.]
Seiji: And what would you have done if you had found her?
[Albion seethes for a few more seconds, then her eyes dim back to normal with a heavy sigh.]
Albion: I don’t know. Tried to save her, obviously. It’s just so frustrating, having to wait for people like the O’Connors or this Joanne Canelli to do their terrible deeds. I have to help as best I can after the fact.
[Seiji shrugs helplessly.]
Seiji: I mean, that’s why we’re the Dawnbringers, I guess. The Dawn would not be bright without the darkness, right?
[Albion looks up at Seiji with a raised eyebrow and the beginnings of a smug grin she’s trying to hold back.]
Albion: I thought you wanted me to cool it on Dawn references.
Seiji: I mean, the line is tired because it’s true. But I wasn’t tired of the one line, it was how you were piling them all on top of each other. You gotta’ let shit breathe.
[Albion growls as she stands up and starts pacing the room. She’s wearing her trenchcoat, obviously ready to head out at a moment’s notice. She’s not bleeding, but she seems to have a nasty welt on her forehead where the monitor hit her. She doesn’t pay attention to that, though; she pulls out a metallic cylinder from one of the inside pockets and plays with it in her hands as she paces. Seiji was about to turn around and keep playing, but then he sees the metal wand.]
Seiji: What the hell is that?
Albion: The nearest thing I have to an answer to your last question. The one about saving that poor woman.
Seiji: Was it a woman for sure?
Albion (angrily): Does it matter? Whatever gender they identified as, it’s a moot point now!
Seiji: Fine, fine. Seriously, though, what is that?
Albion: I don’t want to say much about it right now. I tried to give it to your brother, though.
[This gets Seiji’s attention. He raises both eyebrows now.]
Seiji: Oh? What for?
Albion: To make him whole again. But he wouldn’t take it.
Seiji: Seems like him. Not super familiar with him, but he takes his past very seriously...what of it he can remember, anyhow.
[Seiji pauses for a beat.]
Seiji: Why are you bringing that up?
Albion: I just...there’s apparently no rules and someone can just go around killing people without anyone batting a damn eye, so why not talk about shit no one should know about? No one’s paying attention, so I could blow up your console with my brain and no one would know!
[Seiji chuckles darkly.]
Seiji: Or care...
[Albion’s eyes flare again, but this time it’s definitely a gold shine added in post. You can tell because they then add in an ephemeral version of a metal Domino mask, her gold eyes shining through. They also add in a kitsune mask over Seiji’s face, but without the glowing eyes. After a few seconds, both the gold sheen and the masks fade, leaving just an angry woman with a strange instrument and her baffled partner behind.]
Albion: Now let’s be clear. I would never do that. There aren’t very many classic Playstations around anymore. But what’s old is new again, as can be seen by the Final Fantasy Seven remake, and also the fact that we didn’t leave vampires in the nineties.
[Seiji and Albion take a moment to look directly at the camera, then Seiji goes back to playing while Albion continues to look at the camera.]
Albion: Joanne, in an attempt to calm down, I just want to tell you how disappointed I am in you. Not as regards your wrestling ability, which seems to be as high as you claim, given how you were able to overcome the Wildcat with a minimum of shenanigans...certainly much less than Jade resorted to while still failing. It’s not in regards to your alleged...
[Albion’s eyes start to glow again as the anger rushes back, but she stays composed enough to raise her hands in the intended gesture of dramatic air quotes.]
Albion: “Alleged” vampiric tendencies. I’ll get back to that. No, it’s about how you are dragging the names of such beloved characters through the mud. Look at these guys. Despite being about ninety percent triangle, they have personalities, and desires, and loyalties and conflicts and goals. And their names are saddled on two men who, as far as Kaji and I can gather, have done absolutely nothing for you.
Do they need to? I suppose not. You’ve also got your KGB posse to back you up when you need it, but that just makes your bargain basement Turks even more extraneous than the real ones. But whereas these guys carve a niche for themselves in a world full of apocalypses, you and your guys seem content to occupy a niche so well-worn, I’m surprised you don’t sleep in the basement of arenas and call yourself Valentine.
Though I suppose you have some competition for that name from a wrestler that’s actually worth half a damn.
[Albion starts to tense up, her face screwing up as her anger starts to come back, but she takes a deep breath to steady herself. As she does, she slips the metal rod back into her coat.]
Albion: Of course, he’s also a wrestler with a brain worth half a damn, something I can’t say you have in common with him. I like the part where you claim I said I already have this match won, a thing I have not even had the chance to say about this match yet, and yet you write me off as an easy win just like Jade did.
Is there a stupidity virus going around the KGB? Have that looked at.
Like Jade, you seem to have some issues with reality, so let me help you with that. You throw shade at me for writing you off and yet you write off an entire side of the bracket for tonight’s tournament, hoping it would come down to you and Jade when that wasn’t even a possible final match. I know this business is full of hypocrites, but that’s a new level of shittiness.
[Albion pauses here, and the fury comes back to her eyes, though they do not glow this time. They’re just wide and intense.]
Albion: Now let’s get back to the crux of the matter. You are infinitely more dangerous than Jade was, and it’s going to be a struggle not to try and free the world from someone as remorseless as you. If you’re not truly a creature of the night, you try hard enough to seem like one that you should still be in a straight jacket.
[Albion pauses here to take a steadying breath. Overlaid, superimposed over the image of her steadying herself is the clip of Joanne absolutely digging into Radu Matei at Gold Standard. After a moment, the image fades back to just Albion and she has gathered herself.]
Albion: If you think I have underestimated you, you are gravely mistaken. There’s only one match I’ve ever had that I was more concerned about preparing for, and I had a month for that match. I have had an hour for this one. This will not be pretty, and it will be brutal.
Seiji, here.
[Seiji pauses the game again, well past the boss fight with the Turks and exploring Gongaga, as he turns around and is handed that strange metal wand. He furrows his brow.]
Seiji: Why are you--?
[Albion cuts him off.]
Albion: Just in case I need it after the fight with Canelli. I’m going to be fighting as if my life depended on it, and it very well might. I need you to hold onto it while I do, and I’ll take it back when the match is over so you can prep for the Rumble.
[Seiji looks concerned, not knowing exactly what it is, but knowing its important. So he takes it and tucks it into the inside pocket of his own trench.]
Albion: Thank you. Don’t use it on me unless you have to.
Seiji: How will I know if I have to?
[Albion smiles darkly.]
Albion: You’ll know.
[She sighs a bit as she turns away, the door to the dressing room opening as a stagehand comes in to tell Albion how long she has until her match with Joanne. The camera doesn’t pick up what he says, but it can’t be a big number, as Albion starts hopping in place and getting herself into the proper mindset to walk into a battle to the death.]
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